Today, my stepdaughter called me "Dad" for the first time. It was quite an emotional moment, until I realised she was just recording my reaction for a stupid TikTok, and didn’t really mean it. She’s pulled some pranks before, but this time I’m done with her, she can fuck right off from now on. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after my stepdaughter warned me that she’d get rid of me, she's finally successfully driven such a large wedge between me and my wife that we haven’t spoken in a month, and today she asked me for a divorce. Well played, stepdaughter, well played. FML
Today, I felt comfortable enough to finally call my stepmom "Mom." She politely asked me not to call her that. FML
Today, I happily introduced my stepfather to my friends as my dad. He told me, "Don't ever fucking call me that." FML
Today, within one day of meeting me, my stepmom decided to break up with my dad. Her reason being, "I love you, but I just can’t put up with the kid." I’m 'the kid'. I’m 28 years-old. FML
Today, I have been teaching my 5 year-old step-daughter how to read and write. She came bounding up to me with a piece of paper and said, "look what I did". It was a letter that said "My dad misses my real mommy, not you". FML
Today, my stepdaughter unexpectedly got her first period during a visit. I explained everything to her, then took her to the store to buy supplies and snacks. Her mother called and cussed me out for “stealing” this experience from her. Yeah I totally planned it to happen this way. FML
Today, I brought a girl home. My dad's first reaction was to pull out the camera and snap away. She now won't reply to my texts or calls. FML
Today, my daughter threw my stepson down the stairs. When I asked what the hell was going on, she claimed she was just demonstrating her willingness to seriously injure him the next time she catches him in her underwear drawer or in her room at all. I’m not sure which direction to parent in here. FML
Today, my soon-to-be step-daughter had as absolute meltdown at our rehearsal dinner, screaming that I ruined her family. Her parents were divorced 10 years before I even met him. Her mother was there because we’re friends. She’s 23 years-old. I honestly don’t know which one of us was more embarrassed. FML
Today, after months of not wanting anything to do with her dad, my three-year-old was over her phase. During dinner, I play-shoved my husband and he did it back. Our daughter saw him and now keeps saying, "It’s not nice to push mommy." We’re back to square one. FML
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Top comments
spinningrecords 14
What a horrible kid, I hope karma pays her back in spades.
Hangryko 32
Well, someone's getting an eviction notice on their 18th birthday.
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Comments (6)
spinningrecords 14
What a horrible kid, I hope karma pays her back in spades.
slhiggx 17
She’s a ******* child. Wtf is your excuse?
Dana Triganza 9
Doesn’t say her age actually
RichardPencil 32
I'm looking forward to the sequel after she tells you "¡Ay, papi!"
Hangryko 32
Well, someone's getting an eviction notice on their 18th birthday.
slhiggx 17
She’s a ******* child. They are immature. Be chill.
IHaveThePower 18
If she feels secure enough to do that, you're clearly doing plenty right. She's just immature--kids don't really have developed brains yet. Tell her that hurt your feelings and model how to handle conflict, and she'll learn from it.