Today, I was driving home from college when I saw a couple of sporty chicks jogging on the side of the road. I honked at them and yelled suggestively as I do at college, which usually gets a fun flirty reaction from college girls. It was my next-door neighbor and her 11 year old daughter. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was jogging through my neighborhood and then I notice this cute guy running beside me, we stoped and flirted for a while and my mom drove past. She then rolled down the window and said "Honey, you owe me for the dry cleaning on your period pants." FML
Today, as I was taking an evening jog around my neighbourhood, I passed an elderly woman. I grinned at her as sign of friendliness to a common pedestrian. She grinned back. Whilst staring at my crotch. FML
Today, I was riding my bike on the side of the road because there was no sidewalk. Then a car with a loud horn honked at me. Pissed off, I turned around and screamed "shut the fuck up!" It was my girlfriend's parents saying hi. FML
Today, while driving to my girlfriend's house, I passed up a stop sign without stopping. A car passing by honked. I honked back several times and flipped them the finger. Turns out it was my girlfriend's dad trying to say hi. FML
Today, I was driving home from my friend's house and noticed this really cute girl riding her bike. She had an amazing body, beautiful blonde hair, and looked like my kind of girl! About 10 minutes after I got home, my sister pulled up. She had just biked home from the hair salon. FML
Today, I was driving home from school when I saw this girl I like walking home. Trying to be polite, I pulled over and asked if she wanted a ride. My offer was rejected as she said, "No, I'm actually already home," and walked up the nearest driveway. My driveway. FML
Today, I was running with two other women when a guy started tailing us in his car and catcalling. I quickly got fed up and gave him the finger. Turns out, he's the husband of one of the women I was running with. For the next half hour, I had to listen to her go on about how adorable he was. She totally saw what I did. FML
Today, I was jogging with my shirt off, feeling confident and athletic. A car slowed down next to me. I expected a compliment, but instead, a kid leaned out the window and yelled, “Put it back on, Shrek!” FML
Today, I drove my two kids to their friends' houses. In my convertible, looking what I though was my best, I slowed down outside a bar with cute 20 year old girls in front. My daughter noticed the speed reduction and said, "Keep driving dad, you're fat and mom left you for a reason." FML
Today, I watched as the teenage neighbor girl tried to parallel-park between me and my wife's cars. She was doing pretty well until she backed into mine, got scared, hit the accelerator and ran into my wife's. FML
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Top comments
containsnosoy 0
"Fun flirty reaction"? Are you sure they're not just flipping you off?
fwongraven 10
Now imagine you're a woman and you're walking alone or with a friend, and some bloke drives by you in his car and starts yelling at you. At best it's disgusting and at worst it's downright scary. Whether it's justified or not there's a lot of fear amongst women about being attacked or raped, have some sense and think about what you're doing.
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Comments (117)
perdix 31
Oh, yeah, the mother-daughter sammich. If mom goes for it, it's her problem. She's the one who will go to prison.
perdix 31
I complained when someone from the US used the British spelling. I accept when people from other countries use their local spelling. It doesn't matter whether you are stalking me or not. I am paranoid and delusional enough to think I have a horde of stalkers tracking my every move. And believe you me, I am always ready for you with either a roundhouse kick or an autograph ;)
daengh 15
You're a tool. Maybe the 11-year-old's dad can teach you some manners. Or even her mom.
Allup 0
#29 every wonder why your not getting laid? if so i can tell you
daengh 15
fscking IE reloaded the page w/o updates. too bad I can't install firefox or opera on this computer.
Spastastic 6
Actually, I rather like the world "chick". It just makes me think of beatniks. Otherwise I agree with you, haha.
pshnoway 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Why is everyone freaking out like this has never happened before? Guys honk and yell things at girls all the time, it doesn't mean they're hitting on you, or that they're even interested in you, they're just having fun and joking around. People seriously need to calm down and learn how to take a joke. OP, FYL but next time you go around honking at girls, make sure their at least around your age.
Aloira 0
Yes, it happens a lot, but that doesn't make it right or cool. The OP clearly thinks that the women he normally does this to enjoy it. There might be a few pathetic girls out there with horribly low self-esteem that enjoy getting hit on like this, but the majority are probably annoyed by it. I get hit on my random guys a lot and there's a right way and a wrong way to do it. I don't get offended easily but even I can see that this is the wrong way. OP needs to learn to be a little more respectful.
amy397123 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Who cares, it's just a honk. Take it as a compliment.
owlsong 0
Why would you even honk when there's no chance you'll meet or ever see the person again? It's just some faceless loser, so it's not really a "compliment." Something like "You are very beautiful" is a compliment, a honk is ... nothing at all, except for an annoying sound. You don't go up to someone you're attracted to and say "HEY!!! HEY!!!! DID YOU KNOW YOU'RE HOT?? HEY!!!!!" that's just abrasive and annoying. if you think someone on the street is pretty, great - keep on truckin' because no one else cares.
alexFYL 11
And that is exactly why hot girls are bitches. Because they know they're hot - every man is always telling them that - it's old news. It's irritating. Shut up and compliment them on something else other than their looks. Chances are, if a girl is hot, she has already been hit on that day by like 47 other men and her patience is wearing thin.
pshnoway 0
I think it's amusing when guys honk at girls because it means absolutely nothing but they still get so angry about it. Guys do this to me all the time and I just laugh about it and shout something back.
amy397123 0
#140 is the only sensible one here.
pshnoway 0
Why, thank you.
Tenjin 0
11 year old? That's horrible.
Some___Guy 0
Yeah, honk your horn - women love that. And it might get you a date.
BlueTwist89 0
LOL. Kinda funny--no--really funny they were your neighbors. I think it woulda still been bad if they weren't. It makes it that much worse. Hopefully they didn't tell their parents because that would be you look creepy. Haha.
BlueTwist89 0
Err sorry. Made a typo. You would look super creepy, if they told their parents.
Ascaryrobot 0
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sohomomo 2
damn
kurato 6
dam, I was gona type " why dont you have a sit over there"
fuzz97 23
dude, you're such an asshole.
perdix 31
Calm the **** down, people! I knew an 11-year-old girl who was nearly 6 feet tall and had boobs any woman would envy! Once you knew her age, you put away your lust for her, but if you didnt know better, you'd think she was a hot woman. The OP reported this as an FML meaning he was ashamed of his behavior. If this were Penthouse Forum, then we'd have a Pedo-Bear.