Hetero blues By Anonymous - 03/09/2026 00:00 - United States Today, I have a major crush on my coworker and I hate it because he's s gay and happily married to another man. FML I agree, your life sucks 97 You deserved it 243 Share Tweet Share
Today, the most action I had on Valentine's day was a homeless guy pulling his dick out at me as I walked home from work. FML I agree, your life sucks 23 102 You deserved it 1 937
Today, I was looking through my Internet browsing history. Apparently my wife had searched "How to have an affair without getting caught". FML I agree, your life sucks 41 437 You deserved it 2 729
Today, I was laying down on my couch. My friend IM's me on my laptop to watch a video. It turned out that the video was one of those scary pop up's. I got so scared I dropped my laptop. The screen had a big crack. FML I agree, your life sucks 46 549 You deserved it 10 676
Today, my mother called me and told me that she went to the hospital. This wasn't a surprise 'cos she normally goes to the hospital for the smallest things. I was a smartass and asked, "What now? You finally have lung cancer from all those cigarettes?" Apparently, she does. FML I agree, your life sucks 27 042 You deserved it 101 176
Today, my left eye is bright red and painful. Also, I have pimples all over my genitals. Spoiler alert: it's herpes. The eye? A bacterial eye infection. Welcome to a week of pain. FML I agree, your life sucks 857 You deserved it 352
Today, I wore new shoes to a wedding. Halfway through the ceremony, the left shoe started squeaking with every step. During the silent vows, I had to walk across the room sounding like an angry rubber duck while people turned to look at me. FML I agree, your life sucks 326 You deserved it 124