Today, I was cleaning the windows at work and a guy walked in so I opened the door for him. After I opened the door, he stood there with his eyes closed and his arms open. I thought he wanted a hug so I hugged him. Apparently he wanted me to spray him with Windex. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I thought I was waving at my neighbor, who was also waving enthusiastically back. After smiling and gesturing, I realized she was actually cleaning her windows. I was flirting with Windex. FML
Today, whilst at a red light in my car, a homeless man with a spray bottle and a dirty rag came over to clean my windows. He started with the driver's window, which was wide open, and whatever was in his spray bottle smelled suspiciously like urine. FML
Today, at work, my manager thought I needed to be showed how to use Windex. FML
Today, in a crowded hallway, I saw the guy I fancy standing in front of me, with his arms open wide. Thinking he wanted to hug me, I wrapped my arms around him and stepped back. He looked at me like I was nuts. I then realised he was trying to hug the girl next to me. FML
Today, I went to open my bedroom curtains while still in my pajamas, which, in my defense, were just a very oversized T-shirt. I didn’t realize the window cleaners were outside until I heard one of them say, “Morning!” We made prolonged eye contact before I slowly closed the curtains like I was lowering the lid on my own coffin. FML
Today, I had an interview for a job in a professor's lab. He seemed like a really nice, grandfatherly old guy. We got up to go take a look around the lab, and he held out his arms really wide to me… so I went in for a hug. Turns out he was just gesturing for me to go through the door first. FML
Today, the window cleaner did his rounds at my house. I sat at my mirror applying makeup and doing my hair. When he came to my window, he yelled rather loudly, "Stop putting on a show for me, you dirty slut!" FML
Today, I went to work and said hi to my boss. He reached towards me. I thought he was trying to give me a hug, so I awkwardly hugged him back. Turned out he was just trying to fix my shirt collar. FML
Today, my boss held his polo shirt one inch from my nose and asked me to smell it. He said that he was going into one of our tenants' apartment and wanted to smell him before and after so I could judge said apartment's cleanliness. FML
Today, I went to a guy's dorm for the first time. He told me to wait outside for a minute because he had to "clean something up" first. When I told him I'm 420 friendly, he said, "Nah I just came on my desk earlier and didn't feel like wiping it up." FML
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Top comments
k34nu 7
WTH? Why would someone want to be sprayed with windex...?
Reid5 6
Why would you hug a complete stranger?
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Comments (109)
lex1459 38
Why did he want to be sprayed with windex in the first place...?
hoonyer 17
Dafuq did i just read. . . O.O
rupmaster 0
This is the dumbest one on FML
lorenzoman77 7
That's kinky bro. O.o
Zues11 0
hilarious man! i did this when i was 17 i worked at a TB and this guy walked by opened the door he stood there just looking back i laughed then he wanted me to spray him with the windex.....i wish it was bleach in that bottle
Aurealis 0
Monk.
cloudygirl5 16
2 things #1 who would like to be sprayed with windex #2 why would you hug a random person
worldclassrager 41
Well I think he appreciated the hug also...but that's a strange thing to ask for...
darcislove 18
did you spray him in the eyes for being a weirdo?
hurley12 30
Although it's odd to assume a stranger wants a hug it's weirder that he wanted to be sprayed with windex.