Today, I found out that I spent a year helping my dad get back into shape, not for his own good health which was what I thought, but so that he could cheat on my mom with five other women. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out from my ex-stepmother that my dad and lied about having cancer to cover up the fact that he was losing weight from doing drugs again. He lied about it for 5 years. FML
Today, I was helping my mom look for some money she'd misplaced. At my wit's end, I flipped through her diary, in case she'd hidden it between the pages as she has before. Didn't find the money, but I did find out she might well be cheating on my dad. FML
Today, I found out that my mother was having an affair with my boss "to help me keep my job" because she thought I was useless. FML
Today, I found out my mom is still cheating on my dad with her ex boyfriend from her teenage years. She was caught last year, but apparently it's still going on. FML
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad was having an affair on my mom with. FML
Today, I found out that 15 years ago my father threw out my college acceptance letters so that I could stay home and take over the family's funeral home business. FML
Today, I found out that my father faked his whole "mid-life crisis", just so he could gain my trust and get me to admit that I smoke weed, and to tell him who I buy it from. Hello year-long grounding. FML
Today, I found out that my father, who very recently lost his wife, decided that drunkenly hitting on my long-time boyfriend's mom was a good idea. FML
Today, I found out my mom was getting remarried, to my dad. He's been in prison for five years because he pushed her out a window. FML
Today, I found out my dad stole money from me when he was arrested for buying Oxycodone from an undercover cop. FML
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Top comments
rache8bab 1
who would say ydi on this?!?!? really?
FernandoTorres_fml 0
The OP is Tiger's son?!
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Comments (93)
gth829c 0
5?!....you should go pro
sugarbabyxoxo 2
fyl and your poor mother! I feel bad for you!!
JeaanPauul 0
Tiger Woods styleee.
zthoomassz 0
dont forget john terry style
UrNotFunny 0
ashley Cole style too
n3n324 0
Put fire ants in his condum boy will he get a kick!
White667 0
I know Jesus, FIVE women? That's impressive.
reyemrein 0
Yeah he's got some real talent. And dedication. Most people would have abandoned their goal long before a year of working out. But no. Your dad stuck with it until the end and became the best damn man ***** he could be!
del_taco15 0
TIGER WOODS
iCam808 0
well he did work hard for a year... lol jp ur dads a douche.
goatboy197 0
darn you #20 I was going to mention Tiger!
thatsluv 0
naw 'Cheetah' Woods was like 12 lol
louisstephen 8
I agree
Danielt104 6
OP, tell your dad Tiger Woods that I said hi.
psyco5000 0
does ur dad happen to be tiger wood??
ydiftw 0
He is my hero. Good luck at the masters to him
rwac07 0
john Terry is scumm cos he plays for chelseaaa
samantha_durano 6
man *****.
jman246 0
he's not a man hire he's a ******* legend :)
jman246 0
******
Eddie_Paints 0
Dad FTW!!
tjigga 0
hot^
jennjennsofly 7
wow and ew and wow and ew and wow and ew and wow and ew and wow and ew aha fyl
rache8bab 1
who would say ydi on this?!?!? really?
sskarma23 9
exactly it's not like you could have know your dad would do that
ahhdorablepeach 0
So true!
ahhdorablepeach 0
I wouldnt.
FernandoTorres_fml 0
The OP is Tiger's son?!
NYKnicks36 0
maybe now he will have to go to rehab for having an "addiction to sex"
Buchitoo 4
hahah win^^^^^
PurpleSquirrel 0
Tiger isn't a Tiger anymore.. he's a cheetah.
tellithowitis 13
AHHHHH I GET IT!!!!! THAT WAS AMAZING!!! BEST PUN EVER.
gman81 4
damn, he went tiger woods on himself!
Eddie_Paints 0
45. He's a Lion Cheetah!!
GodBarack 5
Are you sure your dad isn't Tiger Woods?
RichardRocks 3
Haha. that's exactlly what I was thinking when I saw the number "5"
Fedor_is_KING 0
At least you know you did a good job getting him in shape.
sixbabydonkeys 0
can u train me?? haha
blaaaaakely 0
;( bummer! that's truly awful. what a pig.
ComaWhiteLove 18
Why would you have a winking frown face, who winks when they frown?
foolishworkerbee 0
i can't imagine that's the result you were hoping to see after all your efforts. sorry. :/