Today, it's my 18th birthday. Last month was my best friend's 18th birthday. She spent the night with me, and the next morning, my mom and brother gathered in my room and sang "Happy Birthday" as they handed her pancakes with a candle on top. Today, I was woken up by screams to take the trash out. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was woken up by my family surrounding me with breakfast in bed and "Sweet 16" balloons. My birthday is in 3 months, and I'll be 17. FML
Today, it was my 17th birthday. My mom forgot and my best friend is out of town. The highlight of my day? The guy at McDonald's slipped an extra apple pie in my bag. FML
Today, it's my mom's birthday. I woke up at midnight to be the first to tell her happy birthday. When I awoke in the morning, I decided to bake her a cake. Little did I know my whole family was going out to lunch to celebrate. I wasn't invited. FML
Today, it's my 18th birthday. I was telling my friends a story when my mom started talking. I simply said 'Mom...' so she'd realize she interrupted me. She gave me the finger and called me rude in front of all my friends. FML
Today, I woke up early and spent hours baking and icing a three-tier cake for my friend's eighteenth birthday, which is this evening. I just found out my mother threw it in the compost bin because she's on a diet and it was "tempting" her. FML
Today, I turned 22. Instead of cutting my own cake, I stood by and smiled at a friend's belated birthday party. Her birthday was actually two months ago, but she decided to have her party on my birthday. No one remembered mine but everyone got her beautiful gifts. FML
Today, it's my 16th birthday. My parents forgot about it, and planned a weekend out of town. I was alone on my birthday. FML
Today, I turned eighteen. Thinking I was going to get a big present from my parents on this special day, I eagerly unwrapped my present. They got me a bag of M and M's. Last year I got flannel bed sheets. FML
Today, it’s my birthday. My boss treated me to a day off work, except my mother called at 12:01am drunk as hell screaming, “Happy birthday” down the phone. When I finally fell back asleep, I awoke to my boss asking me to come in after all. FML
Today, it was my mother's birthday. My 5 year old brother and 85 year old grandma decided to decorate the house with balloons and a blow up "people" they found in my room. FML
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Top comments
FernandoTorres_fml 0
Nooo, it's all part of the surprise! You go to take the trash out, and someone has parked a car amongst the rubbish! But no, you can't accept it when someone does something nice.
KurouTenshi 0
well on my bday I lost my job, got a bday card that informed me my rent was due, and then I only got to eat cold ravioli (which, incidentally, is just as good cold, as it is cooked)
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Comments (147)
trizzieb 0
Well put #10. I like the way you think.
Boddmon 0
Well, who told you to have a birthday on garbage day? YDI
iSwag 0
haha nice
tsoccerdude 0
happy bday NOT go get a ****** life nd get off of fml and u no wat fyl asshole
tsoccerdude 0
srry for my language
Reset_Smith 0
Sorry for your attitude.
repyourcliche 0
it's okay, i forgive you.
davemania 0
Awww... tsoccerchick... i mean dude :/
repyourcliche 0
strictly speaking they said 'srry'... i don't think we should be so easily forgiving. *apologies to anyone with a lisp who may read this out loud.
tsoccerdude 0
thank u for ur for ur forgiveness
hiyoko 0
Too bad your family seems to like your friend more than you.
CallMeHush 1
Happy Birthday! Want a cookie? I bet you feel better now :D
CallMeHush 1
Oh, I could so use one of those this morning.
ALegitNinja 0
Is Founds Hers Stash! *shares*
CallMeHush 1
Bless your heart. *nibbles a corner•
Sirin_fml 47
Ah, I see you found my cyanide-laced decoys. Excellent, Mister Bond, excellent.
afarr 0
i think im allergic, do they have nuts?
afarr 0
should i have a dead?
notsurewhattoput 0
I do lol
tsoccerdude 0
but u don no if she's good looking
twistedavalon06 0
yeah right.
powermad80 2
Don't take the trash out. You're 18 now and can make your own descisions.
babygraprefruit 0
"My first decision as an adult is to not take the trash out!"
b182link 0
haha their parent will kick them out
skyeyez9 25
Sometimes family members hurt the ones those that are closest to them. It sucks.
doriangray2 0
well what are you gonna do...shit happens