Today, during divorce proceedings, I decided to have my kids DNA tested. Neither of my kids are mine. My daughter's real father is unknown but my son's DNA identifies him as related to me, but not as my son, so he’s more likely my nephew, meaning his dad is one of my brothers. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my husband presented me with a DNA test proving that our newborn daughter isn't his. Confused, I got her tested again. She's not a match to me either. FML
Today, my ex mother-in-law stupidly made an offhand comment, so I got my kids DNA tested. NONE, I repeat NONE of them is mine. When I think of the thousands I’ve paid in child support I’ll never get back, and now my own mother thinks I’m an asshole for refusing to pay any further. FML
Today, my dad's will included a DNA test he did on me when I was 3, proving I’m not his son. I thought we had a great relationship, but apparently he secretly hated me all these years for mom cheating, and decided to embarrass me in front of our family, half of whom it turns out I’m not related to. FML
Today, I found out that my husband secretly DNA-tested all of our kids after they were born. Obviously they're his, but I'm incredibly hurt at his lack of trust and I'm thinking about divorce. FML
Today, in the middle of my divorce, I got paternity tests for both my sons. God must hate me. My eldest son, a criminal currently in prison who I utterly despise, is my biological son, whereas my youngest, who makes me proud every day to be his father, is not my biological son. FML
Today with a DNA test, I found out that my husband is my half brother. 30 years ago his father made a donation to the sperm bank my mother used, and I’m the result. To make matters worse, I’m pregnant. FML
Today, I took a DNA test and it turns out that the person who I thought was my dad is not my actual dad and my real dad is his best friend. FML
Today, my sister and I decided to do one of those online DNA tests just for fun. Our mom came in, saw all the stuff on the table, and lost her mind. She started bawling and apologizing. Apparently, neither one or neither of us actually belong to my dad. FML
Today, a DNA test proved that my 2-month-old daughter isn't mine. The real father is my girlfriend's husband, whom she married last year when she lied to me about going on a vacation. We've been together for three years and I never knew. FML
Today, the paternity test came back. It's like I suspected all along; my "son" is actually my half-brother. FML
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Top comments
xxWTFxx1981 23
Most US states will legally bind you if you signed the birth certificate even if not biologically yours. 18 years of child support and the kids aren't even yours. The worse part is those kids see you as the father. I mean how do you tell them? Do you tell them? Sorry my friend that's got to hurt a lot.
JackWood 21
Blood is not always thicker than water. Some families suck.
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Comments (3)
JackWood 21
Blood is not always thicker than water. Some families suck.
xxWTFxx1981 23
Most US states will legally bind you if you signed the birth certificate even if not biologically yours. 18 years of child support and the kids aren't even yours. The worse part is those kids see you as the father. I mean how do you tell them? Do you tell them? Sorry my friend that's got to hurt a lot.
RawrXD 4
Those poor kids.
RichardPencil 32
You'll probably get off paying her very little. She has a high probability for excellent earnings if she pursues a career... ...as a *****!