Today, it’s been a year since my brother-in-law started sleeping on our sofa. At first I had sympathy, but he hasn’t even been looking for a job, so when I found him wearing my robe, drinking my sherry, in my armchair, I evicted his ass. Now I’m the one sleeping on the sofa because my wife is mad at me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband threw my brother out for wearing his dressing gown and eating his snacks, saying it was the final straw for his lazy, thieving, unemployed ass. I support my husband obviously, but now my parents are mad at me because my brother moved back in with them. FML
Today, what should have been a nice family dinner ended with my wife standing over me, staring me dead in the eyes, while endlessly repeating, “Get him out of my house, get him out of my house…” until I agreed to take my drunk brother to a hotel to sleep it off. FML
Today, my brother lost his flat and is sleeping on our sofa. He’s also unemployed so my husband is getting increasingly angry at him freeloading. To make it up to him, I made his favourite pudding, Angel Delight. He just walked in and caught my brother eating it right out of the fridge. FML
Today, it's been about two months since I made my husband sleep in the spare room after an argument. I invited him back to our room after two nights but he refused. Since then he’s moved a TV, Xbox, fridge and new armchair into the spare room, and put a lock on the door only he has a key for. I’ve barely seen him. FML
Today, and since I got frustrated at my wife as she was harping on at me, yet again, a few months ago, and I told her to shut the fuck up for the first time ever in our 25 year marriage, I’ve been sleeping on the sofa. I’m thinking of changing my address to Sofa, Fireplace Road, Living Room Town. FML
Today, my brother-in-law is super mean and treats me like shit, but carries his wife on a golden platter. I've literally done more for him the past 10+ years of my marriage than his wife of 3 years. I've taken bank loans, packed countless lunches, washed so much laundry, all while his wife doesn't lift a finger for him. FML
Today, despite the fact that I live with my parents and pay rent, my mom decided the best spot for my brother, his wife and one-year-old son was my bedroom. So I'm sleeping on the couch, because it would, "take too long to clean her room." FML
Today, my brother-in-law brought his new girlfriend over to meet the family. Things went south real quick after she went on a tirade about what terrible parents my wife and I are for letting our kids keep all their Harry Potter memorabilia. Now he’s mad I threw her out. FML
Today, my screw-up brother turned up at my house, expecting to move in rent free. Apparently, mom kicked him out and sent him to me. He's a freeloading demon, who's almost impossible to get rid of, so I told him to get lost and locked my door. Now my mom calls every 5 minutes to call me a selfish asshole. FML
Today, my roommate invited her brother over to drink. Neither can handle their drink and her brother is a sympathy spewer. He’s not my guest but I had to clean up vomit until 4 in the morning. FML
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Top comments
poopface82 25
Small price to pay for getting him out. Check local laws, though - you may have to go through some procedure to do an eviction.
Anderling 33
Time to look up tenants’ rights and get the kicking-out started
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Comments (9)
poopface82 25
Small price to pay for getting him out. Check local laws, though - you may have to go through some procedure to do an eviction.
RichardPencil 32
Seems like he was pursuing a career as a Professional Sherry Taster. That's a real job!
Anderling 33
Time to look up tenants’ rights and get the kicking-out started
Battousai124 9
Kick her ass out, too. If she thinks it's OK to mock off of your sister she can join him.
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
I've never understood why anyone is willing to put up with sleeping on the sofa when they feel they were in the right. If you cheated, got caught, and are trying to make up for it, sure. But if she got angry with you cause you solved a problem she should have dealt with months ago, tell her to sleep wherever she wants but you're getting a good night's sleep.
mha8649 8
Evict her ass too. problem solved problem staying solved.
meisiemeisie 8
By brother in law, do you mean your wife's brother? If so, then YDI for unilaterally making a rash decision about HER family member instead of having an adult conversation with your wife and deciding on a course of action together.
Rake 18
YDI, It's her brother, you should have spoken to her about it, before making decisions. It's a basic curtesy and respect.