Today, my distraught mom called me, saying my dad had killed himself and to come home right away. After cussing out my math teacher for trying to stop me and rushing back home in a taxi, I ran into the living room, only to find my parents laughing so hard they were practically in tears. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom texted me in the middle of my end of term math exam, saying it was extremely urgent and needed me to come home ASAP. While skipping my exam, I finally got home to find out my mom forgot what the emergency was. FML
Today, right before the most important final of my education, I got a text from my mom saying my house had burned to the ground, and my children were outside waiting for the firemen. I panicked, left school, and sped home… all for her to laugh and tell me it was “just a joke.” FML
Today, I popped two tires hitting a curb. I called my dad hysterical, and he told me to call my mom and hung up. My mom's been dead for seven years. FML
Today, I was feeling depressed. I overheard my mom crying on the phone. She said, “If my daughter kills herself, who’s going to do the dishes?” FML
Today, my dad walked into my school and joked around saying that he's going to shoot my boyfriend. We all laughed. Except my boyfriend. He was sobbing in a corner. FML
Today, I got a call from my daughter’s school. They found her on the roof, threatening to kill herself. I had to pretend to sound scared and sad over the phone, but in reality, the only emotion I could feel was extreme joy. FML
Today, at work, I was about to close a big sale, when a coworker rushed over and said there was a call for me in the office. He heavily implied my mom had died, and I rushed out. After I figured out there was no call and that my mom was fine, he'd already stolen my sale and the commission. FML
Today, my parents and I went to the movies for my mom's birthday. After the movie, my mom and dad got into a fight, and left me at the movies. My cell phone was dead, and my house was about 12 miles away. They finally came and picked me up, hours later. FML
Today, I was crying after having argued with my boyfriend. My mom saw me, she asked, "Why are you crying? Don't you have homework to do?" FML
Today, my boyfriend died. I was crying in my room when I heard a knock on my door. I thought it was my mom coming to comfort me, but instead she yelled and screamed at me for doing the dishes wrong. FML
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Top comments
tw1st3r 2
Wow FYL... They took the joke too far...
ajourdhui 0
what the ****. what kind of selfish asshole does that to someone? especially someone they love.
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Comments (128)
mborrie 1
thats probably the worst thing anyone could do to you! it's really sad that your parents don't get that !
ItsTheKing 10
People shouldn't joke about suicide like that. Especially if it's about a really close relative like they did to you.
xxenforcerxx 4
woow thats sad. im sorry
saddgurl 0
I can't believe they thought that was funny...
thehouseaddict 3
Your parents give new meaning to being mentally challenged.
Pelreskovich 11
That's is a TERRIBLE joke. I'm sorry :(
JayByrd13 6
haha! wow that sounds like somethin my parent would do
falling4youxo 7
I'm sorry you have ****** up parents, too.
millionz4184 2
I'd get away from them as soon as possible. That's totally dysfunctional. Get ur education and get away.
cooLING 0
To add to #51: try for a scholarship and get a job of you don't have one. You NEED to get outta there. If you have supportive relatives, ask them for help too. I have a cousin who lives with a mom who'd say that kind of stuff. I wish I could take her in but my house is already under enough strain due to having two elderly people to take care of.
crazyperson3 0
Hey be grateful that 1) he is still alive and 2) you have both your parents...
effedml 5
Hard to be grateful for those parents. Very bad parenting.
Jazzalyn 10
That is just ****** up on every level possible. I love a joke as much as the next person...but some things shouldn't be joked about.