Today, I found out my new boyfriend owns, and regularly drives, a forty year-old, smog-spewing sports car. I asked him if he'd ever consider upgrading to electric for the sake of the environment. He said that we wouldn't work out, and that I should leave and lose his number. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I met an awesome guy. He turned out to be very well off at a young age, which excited me, until I learned that he works for a power company and is very enthusiastic about his career. I don't know if I can date him knowing his company is destroying the planet. FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he finds his car more attractive than me. FML
Today, my boyfriend's car broke down on the way to the gym, so he called his dad to give us a ride. On the way, his dad talked about how much he hates me and our relationship, as if I wasn’t sitting in the back seat directly behind them. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to text him when I got home after driving 40 miles in bad weather from his house back to mine. When I did, he broke up with me. FML
Today, I found out that the guy who asked me out only did so because he thought I "looked rich." He broke everything off once he found out I live in a one-bedroom apartment and drive a 14-year old Volvo. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. As I left his house and began to drive away, I see him chasing after my car barefoot. I stop and roll down the window, ready to listen to the speech he has prepared to win me over with. He takes a moment to catch his breath and says "I want my cellphone back". FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend thinks brushing his teeth is unnecessary, because, "the world is going to end because of climate change anyway." FML
Today, I’m stuck on a date with a man who got ready by washing his car instead of showering, is proud to never read newspapers because “they lie”, and thinks racist jokes count as witty conversation. I’d have left already but he drove me, there’s no bus stop nearby, and no Ubers in the area. FML
Today, as I was driving with my boyfriend, he pointed out what a crappy car I drive. About how the locks don't work, the vents are broken, the windshield wipers are busted, my headlights aren't bright, and a hubcap is missing. Then he said I’m a good match for my car, 'cos we have the same “personality". FML
Today, I told my mom I was leaving early to give my boyfriend a ride to work. She asked me why on Earth I’m even attracted to someone who doesn’t have a car. FML
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Top comments
Thaylok 17
It sounds like you approached him in a very rude/disrespect manner. Much like vegans pushing their personal menus on unsuspecting family, blurring out "smog spewing" when talking about a real investment is not going to get you anywhere but back on lonely street. You saved him a lot of effort and time by finding out early, so there was a plus side to your approach.
spinningrecords 14
That may be his dream car and you shit all over it. Not a good approach for a new girlfriend, but better than waiting years to make the attack.
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Comments (8)
Thaylok 17
It sounds like you approached him in a very rude/disrespect manner. Much like vegans pushing their personal menus on unsuspecting family, blurring out "smog spewing" when talking about a real investment is not going to get you anywhere but back on lonely street. You saved him a lot of effort and time by finding out early, so there was a plus side to your approach.
spinningrecords 14
That may be his dream car and you shit all over it. Not a good approach for a new girlfriend, but better than waiting years to make the attack.
Gubbon 17
Isn't it crazy that the 80s were 40 years ago?
OniKudaki 6
Don't you come at me like that.
RichardPencil 32
Not sure why this is an FML and not a mutually agreed-upon parting of ways. If a met some who doesn't like dogs or who does like Trump, buh-bye! Nothing happening here. Nope.
mmm1810 22
Sounds like he dodged a bullet
dreams2383 20
he dodged a bullet. you sound annoying and have no idea how toxic those electric batteries are for the environment. not including everything your wearing,what's in your house the food you eat etc. get over yourself.
Crowned Sataness 12
there's nothing wrong with caring about the environment, but you sound snotty and insufferable. and the electric cars are NOT good for the environment, look up how much they have to mine for one battery. they just trade one evil for another. those batteries don't just grow on trees
sonofmandalor 15
that 40 yr old car has done less damage to the environment than building I electric car lmfao