Today, I thought it would be a good idea to Super Glue a couple of quarters to the sidewalk downtown and watch people try to pick them up. Unfortunately, street patrol was watching me glue everything the whole time. I was fined with public vandalism and defacing US currency. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was walking through town when I saw a plastic bag on the ground. Trying to be a good citizen, I picked it up, intending on throwing it in the trash. When I looked up, there wasn't a trash can for another hundred feet. So I put it back down. Now I've got a $200 fine to pay for littering. FML
Today, in a desperate attempt to get my business "out there", I dropped a few of my cards on a station floor. I got a call, even a quote. A $500 fine from the transit for public littering. FML
Today, I was at a mini arcade and accidentally put a hundred dollar bill through the quarter machine. FML
Today, I got a speeding ticket. I wrote a check, and on the way to deposit my fine, I got another one. I put both fines in a box down town, and I turned around to see a cop putting a parking ticket under my wind-shield wiper. FML
Today, I was walking when I saw a quarter. I bent down to pick it up. Barely a foot ahead there was another, so I crawled over to get it. This continued for about six feet when I realized a kid was laying them out in a trail. I'd collected 7 fake quarters and the kid had it on video. FML
Today, I was walking on the street when a woman in front of me dropped a couple of dollars. I picked them up and chased her to return it all. She insisted that it wasn't hers. I tried to tell her it was, but she wouldn't accept it. A cop saw me and arrested me for solicitation. FML
Today, I was walking through a rich part of the city and saw 2 dollars on the ground. I didn't pick it so people wouldn't think I was poor. FML
Today, I had to pay my bus fare in very small change. After carefully counting out coins under the withering glares of a bus-load of people, I quickly slid them into the machine, and somehow ended up jamming it. FML
Today, while at the vending machine, I put in my $20 instead of my $1. I got my change back in quarters. FML
Today, I found a $20 bill on the ground, so I decided to pick it up. It was actually attached to a string and was meant to be a prank by some kids. They failed miserably, so I took the money. They ran up to me and punched me in the balls for taking their cash. FML
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Top comments
tick_tock 0
Haha, that's hilarious. But yes, you deserved it I'm afraid.
KEVINPASH 0
Street Patrol? you must live in the hood.
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Comments (158)
eeee93757 0
I hit YDI the second I read "Today, I thought it would be a good idea to..." wow, you are a DUMB ASS...and like 93 said, why most people hate most Americans.
mfpeanuthead 0
Can't you do something better with your time??
ILoveJace01 0
Lol hilarious. That is hilarious.
firesaga500 0
YDI 1. Fail 2. There are so many other things you could do. 3. It's cruel to trick people like that, especially if they had a bad day.
tangello 0
this is why you glue and walk at the same time, while "accidently" dropping the glued ones when no one's looking lol
BeautyAndBrains 0
Okay, I ALWAYS give people the benefit of the doubt on this site, so when I say soemeone deserved something, they deserved it, and you definitely did. How bored are you that you decided THAT would be a good idea. Grow up and get a job. Act your age, not your shoe size.
cdorothyc 0
Ha! All in good fun.
mcsnelly 5
really, how old are you? grow up.
rxxk 0
Defacing US certificates of debt is a crime?
24788 7
Wow, cops really have nothing better to do in your city.