Today, my manager came in and said, "Hey Alice, great job closing so well last night. NOT." and walked off. When I heard the door shut, I said, "And great job being a bitch, you cow." I heard my manager walking back towards me. She wasn't the one who'd left the room. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went into my boss's office to confront her about not consulting me before switching my shifts with someone else. I left in tears. FML
Today, my boss bitched me out on the sales floor for a good 10 minutes, because I wasn't "smiling the right way" for our customers. FML
Today, my boss came around to my way of thinking. He called our customers a "bunch of assholes" and to kick them out if they gave me trouble. When a lady began yelling at me for "setting the damn prices too high" I told her to leave. My boss soon bitched me out for being unprofessional. FML
Today, I had to call a coworker to the office via the store intercom. The damn thing didn't turn off properly and everyone heard me say, "I hate that asshole. Just be where your dumb ass should be." I realized my mistake a few seconds before my manager stormed in and threatened to fire me. FML
Today, I told my supervisor how awful my coworker was at her job. I then got fired. FML
Today, my duty manager demanded we close the bar early because she wanted to go home. I was subject to abuse from customers for closing early, then shouted at by the duty manager for not being done. My actual bar manager fired me for closing early. FML
Today, my boss yelled at me for leaving on time. After months of management hounding us about our overtime, I get in trouble for doing what I was supposed to do. FML
Today, at work, my phone rang. My intern answered it and told me it was a coworker who'd just left. I picked up and said "What's up bitch? What are you going to complain about now?!" It was actually my boss. FML
Today, like every day, my coworker showed up thirty minutes late, sat down for thirty more checking email while I got the morning work done alone, listening to her bitch about how much she hates her job and wants to go home. My coworkers criticized me for being moody, and praised her for being the best. FML
Today, I was talking with my closest coworker about her boss. She told me that she yelled at her and told her, "You capricious and silly girl, you have to be more independent and brave for this job. You are a lawyer; think about your duties." She told me this as her boss came up behind us. FML
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Top comments
lyndis_fml 0
Well, she WAS being a bitch. Even if it's true, that's not something you say to an employee. She should have been more constructive with her criticism, and if she can't show respect I don't see why she should expect it from anyone else. That said, she can still fire your ass. Be careful.
LadyAlathia 0
What is this, 1983? Who even says "...NOT!" anymore? You're a poor employee, she's a bitchy cow. Unfortunately, most bosses are bitchy cows these days.
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Comments (77)
TheAngryPrincess 3
Congrats!
doglover100 29
Last time I used the "not" insult I was 9. Your manager needs a better insult.
GnaR_KiLL5150 12
Agreed with OP on what was said but unfortunately the boss doesn't have to give a shit.
justsayingbeach 15
Mature ?