Today, I finally met my girlfriend's family. When it was time for dinner, I was sent upstairs to get her brother. When I walked in, he was laid out on his bed getting a rimjob from his cousin. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. I was on their bed having sex with their daughter. FML
Today, my brother said he was cleaning his room. When I walked in, he was giving my cousin a blowjob. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to visit me and my brother at our apartment. I left for just five minutes to fix us lunch. When I got back, she was making out with my brother. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. It turns out that one day, long before I met my girlfriend, I had a one-night stand with her mother. FML
Today, after getting a pat of appreciation from my girlfriend's father for taking it slow, he found me later, in her room, with my head between her thighs. FML
Today, barely 24 hours after we decided that yes, we were now boyfriend and girlfriend, I caught my “boyfriend” with his cock down my cousin's throat. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got caught doing it in her parents' bed by her mom. Instead of making me leave, they forced me to stay for dinner. FML
Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams to come over for a movie. When I answered the door, my little brother ran up behind me, yelled, "Geronimo!" and pulled down my pants and underwear. FML
Today, my girlfriend went down on me for the first time. Just as I was reaching climax, my brother raced into the bathroom right next to my door and began to vomit extremely loudly. FML
Today, I was going on a date with my girlfriend. When I took her home, her sister came to the door. I used to date her sister and I didn't know they were related. My girlfriend realized this, then kicked me in the crotch. FML
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Top comments
AstroTurfMatador 11
This really doesn't make sense. By the sounds of things, this took place at your girlfriend's family's house. Seeing as how this was the first time you met them, why were you the one sent to get her brother?
interesting33 37
I don't know for sure but it sounds like you walked in without knocking or waiting for an answer. If that's the case then YDI
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Comments (37)
ChakatBlackstar 29
Don't you know how to knock?!
raven_of_azarath 35
Bleached eyes or bleached ass?
Mightytall 35
Knock! You always knock and wait for an answer before you walk into a room!
Davros 12
What does your girlfriend say after an ******? Get off me cuz, your crushing my cigarettes.
atomwolf 11
You could have just knocked the door like a person who respects the privacy of others. I get that you shouldn't have to expect something like that, but it's like driving. You have to anticipate the worst thing happening
Emma Marshall 19
How'd you know it was the cousin
dajokerscopes68 4
must live in the south
QueenAfrodite 8
Whoa
Blunt person 16
Uhh, incest is a criminal offence where i'm from, so....
GUYMAINE 16
Have you ever heard of knocking? Obviously not, so what you do is ball your hand into a fist. Then you hold it in front of you, knuckles facing you. And lightly tap the door with said fist to get the person inside the door/rooms attention.