Today, I was at the store with my grandpa. When we were rung up, he started to pay for our myriad groceries in coins, and the guy behind us groaned. My grandpa said, "Shut your mouth," and started ranting about how stupid people are to leave paper trails for "government spooks." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I spent twenty minutes helping an elderly man figure out how to use the self-checkout. When we'd finished, he smiled, thanked me, then walked away… without paying for any of his groceries. The cashier assumed I was with him. FML
Today, I was waiting in line for what seemed like forever at the only open lane at the grocery store. The guy in front of me took his sweet time and had multiple cards rejected, before finally pulling out a $100 bill and demanding exact change. He was buying a carton of milk. FML
Today, I was at the gas station with my grandma. After I slid her card and began to pump, I convinced her that it was a lot easier and more convenient to pay at the pump with your credit card instead of paying inside. She yelled as I realized I went $20 over what she had to spend. FML
Today, at a self-checkout, I scanned all my items, bagged them, and left. Only when I got outside did I realize I had completely forgotten to pay. I then noticed that security was running to stop me, and I had to explain that I wasn’t a thief, just an idiot. FML
Today, in a hardware store, I had to physically restrain my senile grandpa from trying to take a crap in one of the display toilets. FML
Today, a customer came into McDonalds and placed his order. He insisted on putting each coin on the counter rather than handing them straight to me, because he doesn't like touching "poor people". FML
Today, I had an elderly man come to my cash register. His total came to $15.50 He handed me $5 in nickels and dimes. A full roll of quarters. Before I could take the roll, he bust it open, making me count it. After that was all counted he was 50 cents short. So he handed me a $10 bill. FML
Today, I went to the grocery store where this really cute guy works. I swiped my card but the machine wouldn't read it. I swiped it quickly some more before getting frustrated and saying, "Your stupid machine doesn't work!" He took the card and turned it around. His face said it all. FML
Today, I was shopping at the grocery market and was next in line. Behind me was a woman who only had two items, so I nicely let her in front of me, as it looked like she was in a hurry. When she was all rung up, she decided to pay her $16.45 in loose change which needed to be counted out. FML
Today, I helped a very large elderly man, who thanked me and tried to hand me a dollar bill. I kindly told him, "We are not allowed to accept tips from customers." His reply was, "You're going to take this fucking money," and shoved it in my pocket. I'm now being written up for it. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
TBelle4Ever 15
Oh Grandpa, are you still taking your medication?
PleaseStayChill 9
Yes, because $1 bills are completely in our imaginations.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (39)
Texaporte 3
Haha, when I was 12, I saved up a bunch of change and used it to buy a Gameboy Color. The checkout lady at Walmart was PISSED. That was SO much fun. :D
worldclassrager 41
as long as it's paid for...the other guy can go to another register if needed...
hateevryone 15
Going out with your grandpa would be an adventure.
nativegirl13 3
Am I the only one who noticed that ,elderly people talk alot about the government?
kimg0885 23
At least he was just talking about that bogus govt. he's right they are tracking you, they are tracking you right now.....* door breaks down
sabri246 5
Oh, grandfathers...
hailezz349 5
Sounds like gramps found the vodka stash..
hailezz349 5
Sounds like gramps found the vodka stash..
Pandasaurus 14
why do elderly people talk so much about the government? ._.
Elkrider 13
Reminds me of somebody I used to know, he refused to have cable TV at home because "the government will use it to look in on you". My question what the government could possibly want to see in the living room of an 85-year-old guy was ignored in a very pointed manner. ;^>
TheComputerGuy96 16
NOW YOUR JUST SOMEBODY THAT I USED TO KNOW