Today, due to "severe cuts to the budget" at work, I had to stir my coffee with a paperclip. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was having my morning coffee while getting ready for work. I grabbed clothes off the floor to throw in the hamper. I accidentally threw my full coffee instead. FML
Today, I'm so strapped for cash that I smuggled toilet paper out of my mother's house. FML
Today, I accidentally threw a glass of iced tea in my own face, because the restaurant I'd been going to for over a decade switched from heavy glass mugs to identical light-as-a-feather plastic mugs. FML
Today, I was told it was inconvenient for me to take lunch breaks, because someone else has to answer the phones and no one else wants to actually do any work. FML
Today, I arrived at work six minutes late due to heavily congested traffic. This is just two days after my boss put out a memo saying that anyone who's late to work from then until the new year will have their holiday bonus pay forfeited. FML
Today, while battling a severe flu, I was forced to come to work by my manager. Upon arrival, I discovered that a colleague he likes who should be covering for me is out today. The reason? Her shoes hurt. FML
Today, I had to wait in a hospital room because I cut myself with a knife while trying to open a box of soda. After three stitches, I went home only to notice the box has an easy-open tab. FML
Today, I went to ask my boss for a raise. Turns out they are firing 35 people. I wasn't on the list until I asked for a raise. FML
Today, I took my printer to work because the one in my office is broken. When I tried to leave, my boss stopped me and accused me of stealing it from the office. Nobody would believe me when I explained. Now my boss has a new printer. FML
Today, I was fired for having a haircut that was 'inappropriate for the workplace'. I have alopecia. My boss told me to stop making up excuses. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
evilplatypus 39
I'd rather they take the coffee stirrers than the coffee. Or my job. Be grateful for what you DO have.
whitey53 5
Hey man, whatever works lol
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (48)
Peach3 1
Did it occur to you to wash your hands and use your finger...?
rbr0wn 3
Would you stir hot coffee with your finger?
coltsrock37 15
Just make sure you don't wake up with some exotic form of tetanus.
The_Troller 14
You think that's severe? My mom just laid off about 10 people in the past week, be grateful that you have a job and can afford to pay for coffee.
cjwalsh86 0
Oh you POOR thing!!!! .........
jester613 2
Bring a spoon from home and keep it at work. Why is this even an issue
je_suis_fml 11
Yea, I was trying to figure out how this was even a FML, smh. I thought he was gonna say how he was laid off, but instead the bloke cries about a damn paperclip! Yes, poor OP.. he has a job in this economy, but no coffee stirrer! Shat up..
pjsr 33
This economy?!? Wth are you - the economy is great, unemployment is extremely low. Almost everyone is short of workers.
ninjuh_wingman 29
I think that if you used your finger it would hurt since coffees hot
sparty12 2
wait...you get free coffee at work and complain that they don't have stirring sticks? wow.....just....wow
every1luvsboners 11
Paper clips are more expensive than coffee stirrers. So according to my calculations, your workplace is doing fairly well if you're stirring coffee with paper clips.
gac1883 0
Be thankful you have a job
AngryBlckMan13 2
Bring your own damn spoon...