Today, I realized that I can recognize each member of my disgusting family by the sound and smell of their farts. I can’t wait to move out. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realised I can tell which family member has just left the bathroom from the smell alone. FML
Today, the smell of my own fart made me feel hungry. FML
Today, I realized that having the apartment bathroom next to my bedroom space isn't so great and convenient when it's occupied by my evil roommate, Fartzilla. I hear every constipated grunt, despite having music turned up. Worse, it's like living next to a poop-pourri factory. Nose bleach, anyone? FML
Today, as I was walking out of my building that I have just moved into to walk my dog, a kind neighbour held the door open for us. Just as I walking walking though, I let out the loudest stinkiest fart in history (thanks fertility meds). I guess I’ll have too move out now… FML
Today, I've gotten to that point in life where I can no longer seem to trust a fart. FML
Today, I finally determined the source of the horrible smell that periodically invades my apartment: there's nothing wrong with the plumbing as I previously thought, I can just smell my neighbors pooping in their bathroom on the other side of the wall. FML
Today, I now know why my next-door neighbour can't look me in the eye without smirking. He can hear every grunt, groan, fart and strain that happens in my bathroom from his bathroom. FML
Today, my mother bolted into my room and let out a huge fart that smelled like rotten meat because she wanted to prove a point, that she had been having intestinal problems for three days. FML
Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML
Today, I returned home after a four day weekend at my parents' house. Upon entering by the front door, a horrid stench assaulted my nose. Hours later I still cannot find the source of the foul odor. I'm starting to wonder if this is how it's always smelled without my knowing. FML
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Top comments
Akitakat 31
I would sniff out all my options before making any sudden moves.
Glowworm56 27
*Loud fart is heard* "Oh, hi, dad!"
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Comments (7)
Akitakat 31
I would sniff out all my options before making any sudden moves.
Glowworm56 27
*Loud fart is heard* "Oh, hi, dad!"
Tripartita 45
*slightly quieter fart* “I’m doing alright. How about you?”
RichardPencil 32
Why? You’re just going to have to start over matching each new person to the sound and smell of their farts. Unless you are going to live alone, in which case the name that fart game gets pretty easy.
acmariner99 25
What about yours?
Fritterzz 13
You have a gift.
sheeeeet 11
Makes one wonder how to recognize you, you know what they say : who smelt it dealt it!