Today, my girlfriend accused me of being a feeder, saying that's why she's been putting on so much weight. When I said it might be because she eats at McDonald's everyday, and that I was willing to start cooking low-calorie foods for us, she hit me. Then she went to McDonald's. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took my girlfriend out for lunch, and I asked her if I could have a bite of her meal. She took it to mean I was calling her fat, and stormed out. FML
Today, my girlfriend threw a bitch fit about her clothes not fitting and how she’s “so fat” to the point of storming out of the house when I asked her to please calm down. Just a couple of hours earlier, we'd ordered food and she ordered a salad, then asked to trade my burger and fries with her. FML
Today, my girlfriend had a bitch fit because I snatched a couple of her fries for myself. She regularly raids my snacks, takes food off my plate, and has even stolen my work lunches, but a couple of fries is too much to ask. FML
Today, my fiancé and I had a fight because he wouldn't let me get what I wanted to eat, even though it was my money. He said, "It's way too many calories. I'm supposed to help you lose weight." When I pointed out that I had given up a month ago, he looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can tell." FML
Today, my girlfriend had a huge fight with me because while I'm trying to gain weight and she’s trying to lose some, I’ve still lost more weight than her. Not my fault my body’s natural preference is to drop pounds like they’re hot. FML
Today, after my girlfriend continuously whined for hours about a specific burger place, I finally gave in and we drove nearly two hours to get there. Once in line, she looked at the menu, then decided everything had too many calories and wanted to go home. She doesn’t get why I’m pissed. FML
Today, I was making dinner for my family while my wife was at work. She walked in the door with McDonald's, even though she knew I was cooking. Then our kids saw and started screaming that they wanted McDonald's too and that it was unfair. I've told her not to pull this shit and she won't listen. FML
Today, I burned dinner because my girlfriend was yelling for me to help with a trivial problem. To salvage things, I ordered pizza. She spent the rest of the evening moaning that I ruined dinner, that we don't eat healthy, and that I "make us" waste money on food. FML
Today, my girlfriend is mentally unhinged. She had a full on temper tantrum and ranted about healthy eating, and how she’s “fat” and needs to lose 30 pounds, all because I suggested Buffalo Wild Wings for dinner. She stormed out of the house. I later ran into her at a local pizza place, devouring a pizza. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I've recently become serious about getting fit, and have lost nearly 84 pounds. Apparently, when I was fat, I made her look smaller in comparison. When I got slimmer, she insisted I either gain the weight back or she'd leave. So she did. FML
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Top comments
xkncas 8
Leave her. She won't change.
KingCeltic77 18
I would try showing her Super Size Me, that might scare her into not eating it.
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Comments (148)
Ukeee_X 19
Woah. Talk to her about that, that ain't right man. You eat healthily and she might catch on
CreepInTheCorner 11
That spelling of "calorie"... Wow.
xAttackAttackx 25
The I is right next to the O. He probably didn't notice the accident.
klaggoon 4
you deserved it for going out with a fat violent bitch. seriously, if you dump her you deserve evereything she does to you
ThomasMercury 11
Break it off! Break it off! Break it offfff!!!
TiddleyMoney 7
smack her with a low calorie meal kike BAM! it may knock a coupke pounds off.
Psycho_Babydoll 26
Jeez, what's with all the hitting FMLs lately?
Lvl_8 7
- 5 Defense
Lvl_8 7
- 5 Defense
MuseFan1991 14
people like that make me sick! i know one woman who ate so much junk food during pregnancy that her child is now diabetic. this same woman goes to the gym once a week with my sister in law (who is an annoyingly slim Uk size 10), does half an hour on the cross trainer and then goes to McDonalds! as a sport science graduate, this made me physically angry. half an hour cross trainer burns about 200 calories tops, and there's well over 1000 calories in a McDonald's meal. no wonder the world is getting so obese
CharresBarkrey 16
Who cares? Live your life, you don't need to control how other people live as well.
functional 13
by that logic, you shouldn't even tell him/her how to live his/her life.
JanisEvans 10
UK 10 isn't annoyingly slim. It's fairly average healthy. I'm a UK 8 and could still stand to lose a few pounds.
MuseFan1991 14
im not trying to tell people how to live their lives, i was just commenting on how some people dont realise how much danger their putting their children in by eating constantly at McDonald's. i apologise if i sounded unneccesarily harsh but it just makes me so angry. and janis, size 10 is annoyingly slim when the person in question has had a child and i'm struggling to get from a 14 to a 12 :P
upallnight11 19
Who the hell eats at McDonalds every day? That's sick! How is she still alive?
coolster5000 22
My friend eats at fast food restaurants every single day. I think he stopped growing . He's been doing that for about 9 years . That's who