Nearly FMLs

By KatzVKatz - 13/01/2016 12:27 - Slovenia - Novo Mesto

Today, I went for a nice, relaxing swim in the pool. Later, as I was in the dressing room taking my wet swimsuit off, I looked down and saw a hand holding a phone under the door. Whoever was filming, now has a direct shot of my lady parts on his phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3

You deserved it 0

By where's the wood - 13/01/2016 12:08 - United States - Myrtle Beach

Today, I got into my first car accident. Yesterday, I told my best friend that I'd never been in one and that it felt like everyone was trying to hit me. I guess I jinxed myself. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

By bronxiecat777 - 13/01/2016 12:07 - United States - Glen Burnie

Today, I couldn't get a ride home from basketball practice. I had to walk across town, in the dark, in 10 degree weather, wearing shorts. The snow froze to my legs. It was sparkly. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

By vicnic - 13/01/2016 11:56 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, my business went liquidated. I also can't get govt financial assistance because I have to wait two weeks to book an appointment to get approval of the assistance, then two weeks for it to come through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 0

By forever virgin - 13/01/2016 11:07 - Italy - Rome

Today, after getting married and Having waited to loose my virginity to the man i love.. I found out my husband his equipment has the size of my pinky.. There Goes my wish to have children. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

By controllingmother - 13/01/2016 10:54 - Australia

Today, my mum yet again opened and read my mail, including my bank statement. I'm 22 and she someone called me 'rude' when I told her my mail is no longer her concern. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

By woopsmybad - 13/01/2016 10:49 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, After three years of paying for everything, putting up with drug abuse and having my birthday forgotten I found out my partner had been cheating on me. Finally, I was able to stand up for myself and break it off. At least I thought so until an hour later I was the one apologizing. Wait... FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 1

By napo - 13/01/2016 10:19 - Australia

Today, I sat on a 13 hours flight next to someone who spoke non stop about Napoleon Bonaparte. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 1

By HollieLollie - 13/01/2016 10:01 - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, I slipped on ice and broke my foot, outside of the hospital I was just leaving after getting my cast off of that same foot. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 1

By awspinks77 - 13/01/2016 09:40 - Korea, Republic of - Seoul

Today, I met in person a girl I'd been casually talking to online. The sole thing she didn't lie about was her somewhat annoying personality. Age? Not 20. Try 50. Height? Not 5'1", more like 5'10". Among many other things. I left her at Starbucks after 5 minutes and now she won't leave me alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By awspinks77 - 13/01/2016 09:31 - Korea, Republic of - Seoul

Today, I met this homeless man who told me his tragic life story. It brought me to tears. So saddening, that I handed him $200, wishing him a good day. I leave the store I went to and go to get in my vehicle, and I watch this same man get in a Bugatti and drive away. I want my money back. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 13/01/2016 09:14 - United Kingdom - Wantage

Today, It's my birthday and I'm on the school ski trip. I missed a call from my Mum so I rang her back, My Dad answered and got furious at me for ringing, shouting how it costs money and 'why on earth would you ring??' not once did he say happy birthday........ Apparently he didn't realise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 1

By out of shape - 13/01/2016 08:46 - United States - Lancaster

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex for the first time, it was great until we both got a cramp in our legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 0

By kerplunk95 - 13/01/2016 08:40

Today, i was kicked out of home with my one year old son with nowhere to go all because i finally got the balls to ask my mother who my father is FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

By theregoesmyA - 13/01/2016 08:23 - United States - Bloomington

Today, I sent my friend an email containing a long rant about how one of my current professors is a total ass. Unfortunately, my professor and friend have similar email ids. Guess who I accidentally sent the email to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 0

By thebakingseal - 13/01/2016 08:10 - Australia

Today, I got so scared at a dream that I had to come into my parent’s room and sleep there for the rest of the night. I’m 25. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 1

By Multidarkdude - 13/01/2016 07:53 - United States - Palm Coast

Today, I found out that one of my old crushes actually finds me attractive. However, he's been engaged to his high school girlfriend for the past three years. I'm nearly 20 years old and I've never been in a legitimate relationship. Being gay sucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

By kill-me - 13/01/2016 06:46 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my boyfriend and I discussed how much we dont want kids. Guess who just found out theyre pregnant? Yeah, me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 0

By DAYDR3AM3R - 13/01/2016 06:45 - United States - Oakland

Today, about ten minutes ago, actually, I walked into the bathroom I share with my grandmother. She managed to get fecal matter all over the sink and countertop. I cleaned it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 1

By holycrapimgonnadie - 13/01/2016 06:34 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was laying in bed trying to fall asleep when I felt something cold brush against my hand. Startled, I gasped "what the-" and suddenly heard something scramble out my room. I live alone and I don't have any pets. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

By chel96 - 13/01/2016 06:16 - Canada - Ottawa

Today I was shocked to see a zero beside an assignment worth 20%. I emailed my prof and she told me it was an error and that I had to bring in the original graded copy (I got an 80%) to her office and she would be happy to fix it. I accidentally puked on it last week when I was super drunk. fml.

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 2

By fycklyfe - 13/01/2016 06:09 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I went to write my final exam for Physics. Moments before the exam, I was bragging on how I would get a 100% to a friend. Apparently my teacher overheard, today I found out that the 100% on the marking site was put there by "mistake," which he told me while laughing. Guess who got 29%. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4

You deserved it 0

By INeverWin - 13/01/2016 06:09 - United States - Hyattsville

Today, I decided to be spontaneous and buy a PowerBall ticket for the first time. On the way home, I hit a deer and totaled my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

By Anonymous - 13/01/2016 06:02 - United States - Huntington

Today, right after my friend called, I was telling my dad about how that friend just can't manage her money and makes such bad life decisions that I wish I could run her life for her. She called me back just to tell me that I forgot to hang up. She heard it all. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

By Anonymous - 13/01/2016 05:54 - United States - Conway

Today, it's the third day in a row that I've gone to brush my teeth and found my toothbrush already wet. I sleepwalk so I figured that I had just brushed my teeth in my sleep a couple times. Then, I looked to my brother's side of the bathroom sink to find that our toothbrushes are identical. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 0

By ShadowReiku - 13/01/2016 05:53 - United States - Herndon

Today, I discovered that when my cousin's three year old is visiting, she uses my electric toothbrush because it's "coolest." I've called in sick to work four times in the past month because my cousin can't control her bucket of disease. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

By anonymous - 13/01/2016 05:13 - United States

Today, it's my girlfriends birthday and she said she couldn't hang out because she'd be with family. Half an hour later while getting food I see her at the restaurant with her ex

I agree, your life sucks 3

You deserved it 0

By FUBAR_88 - 13/01/2016 05:13 - Australia - Burpengary

Today, after being rear ended twice I was having an ultrasound on my shoulder to see if I have torn the tendon. The lady said it must have been a bad car accident. Looks like I'll be having surgery to fix it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 0

By agony - 13/01/2016 04:55 - United States - Brandon

Today, i managed to give myself a nosebleed, poop, and prolapse my asshole all at the same time. My mom is laughing at me as she drives me to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

By Anonymous - 28/12/2015 04:46 - United States - Windsor Heights

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate for the first time when she noticed I only have one testicle. She immediately broke up with me, for she doesn't want her future sons to be gay because they'll only have half of their testosterone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 484

You deserved it 2 135

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The Top

Today, I received a letter from my landlord's attorney. It said my landlord is terminating my "verbal" lease with him. Ten years ago, the deal began as rent to own. My landlord is my grandfather. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 941

You deserved it 764

Today, I tried to go rollerskating with my kids. I wasn’t even able to fully stand up before I fell and broke my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 486

You deserved it 148

Today, I found out nobody in my family wants to come to my college graduation. I spent four years and $60,000 to be the first person in my family to go to college, and nobody wants to see me graduate because the four hour ceremony is "too long." FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 515

You deserved it 4 618

Today, I went to visit my boyfriend at work. That's where I met his pregnant girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 371

You deserved it 5 156

Today, I had to get an ultrasound, which required me to drink 3 glasses of water beforehand. The doctor said I had too much and told me to go pee out just a little and come back. It took a lot of effort to hold the rest in. The first thing she did when I got back was press on my abdomen. I peed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 092

You deserved it 4 447

Today, I was skiing and crashed into a tree. It was the only tree on the slope. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 355

You deserved it 545