Nearly FMLs

By periods - 18/12/2015 16:37 - United States - Palo Alto

Today, I complained about period cramps. My boyfriend said periods can't be that bad since "girls must orgasm every time they put a tampon in." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 757

You deserved it 2 225

By Anonymous - 13/12/2015 11:47 - Australia - Canterbury

Today, I found out my girlfriend is a full-on, wants-to-be-banged-by-a-horse furry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 189

You deserved it 3 600

By good2know - 09/01/2015 23:09 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my boyfriend gave me my first ever orgasm. Then he bitched me out for insulting his intelligence, saying it was "blatantly fake" and that "women don't orgasm like that". FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 883

You deserved it 3 541

By failed dad - 25/06/2014 12:30 - Greece - Athens

Today, I heard my son say, "I don't want any bacon with my eggs". Where did I go wrong? FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 263

You deserved it 19 393

By tinytiny1124 - 14/04/2014 16:57 - United States - Columbus

Today, I had to convince my 3-year-old son that there were monsters in the house just so he would lie in bed and cuddle me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 246

You deserved it 28 321

By DaniD - 03/04/2014 21:52 - United States - Woodstock

Today, at work I was getting out of my car. I parked next to a coworker. As I open the door the wind catches the door and slams it again her car door. I grabbed it to look at the damage when the wind grabbed it and slammed into her door again. Huge dent. FML!

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 0

By Pdawg09 - 03/04/2014 21:52 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my anxiety got so bad I began hyper-ventilating. My long term boyfriend decided to pretend he didn't know me while it happened because "I looked ridiculous".FML.

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 0

By Haley1322 - 03/04/2014 21:49

Today, my aunt told me to go grab a pair of scissors that were in my dads side drawer. As I was looking through his side drawer, I found a "his and hers" lubricant pack. It was open. And wet. Fml.

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 1

By Anonymous - 03/04/2014 21:47 - United States - San Francisco

Today, after waiting almost 10 months to see a doctor, I show up for the appointment they rescheduled twice. When I try to check in I'm told that they don't have an appointment for me today, rather that I never showed up for the one that they cancelled! FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 0

By charlie3289 - 27/10/2013 05:01 - United States

Today, I was at work when I found an iPhone on the floor. I decided not to turn it into the manager and keep it. Five minutes later, a customer asked if anyone had turned in her missing phone. I said no and began to walk away, when her friend called her phone. It rang. She recognized the ringtone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 744

You deserved it 209 046

By stewhart - 24/10/2013 07:25 - United States

Today, I was playing Farmville all day, and I was really into the game. I was getting phone calls all day, but I kept ignoring them cause I was making so much Farm Money. Come to find out it was my son's school. He fell off the jungle gym and broke his arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 357

You deserved it 140 876

By Anonymous - 14/09/2013 05:23 - United States - Hudson

Today, I was playing World of Warcraft, when all of a sudden, I remembered I was supposed to be at a wedding. I was 25 minutes late to my own wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 016

You deserved it 99 897

By sad - 14/07/2013 03:58 - United States - Herndon

Today, my daughter has had a speech and language problem for over the past couple years. Me and my husband were trying to talk as much as possible around her, just so she could pick up words. Now at age 5 she said "Mommy, you talk WAY to much. I think you have a problem." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 0

By Tim - 02/07/2013 15:43 - United States

Today, while drinking at a bar with my girlfriend, my ex-girlfriend who I've been seeing on the side walked straight up to her, introducing herself as "the ex-girlfriend that he's been sleeping with for the past 3 months." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 204

You deserved it 216 025

Dearknon tells us more.

Dearknon 4

Friday 2 July 2010 23:12

I'm the OP. Wasn't looking for sympathy. Was actually a very funny situation, since my GF immediately ignored my Ex and we continued with our night like normal. Haters gonna Hate. Sad part is now I'm losing the Ex because she's pissed my GF didn't believe her :D

By Anonymous - 08/06/2013 20:53 - United Kingdom - Bromley

Today, I walked in on my dad masturbating to a nude photo of my mum on the computer. She passed away four years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 105

You deserved it 14 340