Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

stevenJB

Offline (the 02/05/2016 at 9:16pm) | Search for a member

stevenJB

18Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Parmelee, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 12813
  • Number of comments : 396
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 23 posted

About stevenJB : Yay you're my latest stalker! :D well, just to start off...I'm a rocker and metalhead so I listen to alot of punk,metal, rock. All that good stuff. I'm native American and have long black hair that is a few inches over a meter long (longer than my arm if I hold it out). I play electric guitar,bass guitar and sing some too. If you wanna know anything or know anything just send me a message. Because I have alot of free time >.> and feel free to kik me: "lockolaine"
"The only thing you should feel when you shoot somebody, is the recoil"
UPDATE 12/20/14
Cut my hair off, will update profile info later.
UPDATE 1/5/15
I forgot to update a year ago, further updates in time!

stevenJB's page activity

Visits<b>M3DO</b> - 2 hours ago<b>alexishbu</b> - 5 hours ago<b>xninix</b> - 13 hours ago<b>mominlaw</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 2:21am<b>missadell</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 11:45pm<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 5:01pm<b>kyletg09</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 2:37pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 3:58am<b>yellow33</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 5:00pm<b>MiLM</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 10:16am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 7:32pm<b>Dynosaur_dollie</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 8:12pm<b>BonerFart</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 10:42am<b>Zlatan12443</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 7:41am<b>edenxero</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 12:22am<b>atinytoebean</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 4:40pm<b>RandomFood</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 9:21pm<b>MrsJoHood</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 8:47pm

Fucked!<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 11:01pm<b>yellow33</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 5:42am<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 1:05pm<b>sugoi72</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 10:46pm<b>ismailfayez</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 2:00am<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 4:58am<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 3:15pm<b>MiLM</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 7:25pm<b>NotNeeded</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 9:19pm<b>missadell</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 9:10pm<b>UselessReject23</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 7:46pm<b>cadillacgal79</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 12:04am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 10:39pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 11:46pm<b>leeleeamber</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 12:31pm<b>DoomSkuller</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 8:02am<b>sneakattacked</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 6:09am

stevenJB's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of stevenJB's badges

stevenJB's favorite FMLs

Today, my bra burst apart in the middle of class. I then had the privilege of asking my male teacher if I could borrow his stapler to put it back together. FML

#19067640
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30036) - you deserved it (4223)

On 02/13/2012 at 7:28pm - misc - by chlolivia (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML

Today, I cracked a rib coughing. FML

#19063731
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33476) - you deserved it (2828)

On 02/13/2012 at 6:32am - health - by anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I had a debate with my girlfriend about whether giving birth or getting kicked in the balls hurts more. It ended up with her kicking me in the balls. I was the one who said giving birth hurt more. FML

#19053808
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34081) - you deserved it (6257)

On 02/12/2012 at 1:17am - love - by OwMyBalls (man) -

Today, my girlfriend openly mocked me, calling me an idiot for thinking seahorses are real. She insists that they're like unicorns, and only exist in fiction. FML

#19011478
362 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40510) - you deserved it (4578)

On 02/06/2012 at 4:52pm - animals - by BoringFucker (man) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, my girlfriend openly mocked me, calling me an idiot for thinking seahorses are real. She insists that they're like unicorns, and only exist in fiction. FML

#19011478
362 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40510) - you deserved it (4578)

On 02/06/2012 at 4:52pm - animals - by BoringFucker (man) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, while I was standing in line at the store, some guy insulted the girl in front of me as he walked past. She turned around and socked me in the face. FML

#19011410
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29189) - you deserved it (2064)

On 02/06/2012 at 4:43pm - health - by Marc - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was having lunch at McDonald's when I dropped a French fry down my shirt. It stuck out the top of my bra. Before I had the chance to remove it, a creepy man picked it out and ate it saying that it was the best French fry he had ever eaten. FML

#19000148
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47880) - you deserved it (4876)

On 02/05/2012 at 10:45am - misc - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, some guy hit my car and then threatened to sue me for "parking my car in such a way that it was impossible not to hit it." My car was in the driveway. FML

#18998594
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31868) - you deserved it (2195)

On 02/05/2012 at 3:08am - misc - by dreefsa - United States (California)

Today, I received a single, hand-made Valentine's card from the weirdest kid in the school. It said, "If you ever get mauled by a bear, I hope he doesn't damage your face." FML

#18988741
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29518) - you deserved it (5408)

On 02/04/2012 at 12:12am - love - by Jayde - United States (Texas)

Today, I took off my sweatshirt in the middle of class. The tanktop I was wearing underneath went with it. FML

#18980998
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32670) - you deserved it (7880)

On 02/02/2012 at 11:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I got punched by a man for making fun of his stutter. I didn't. I stutter too. FML

#18980797
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41594) - you deserved it (2530)

On 02/02/2012 at 11:00pm - misc - by Sam (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I reached a new low in my relationship: my boyfriend got so drunk I had to help him take a piss. FML

#18979126
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26899) - you deserved it (5882)

On 02/02/2012 at 8:02pm - love - by lillymean (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, I picked up a prostitute. The prostitute was my sister, and I picked her up from jail. FML

#18967800
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60307) - you deserved it (4652)

On 02/01/2012 at 10:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I went to see a doctor about some of the memory problems I've been having. After the appointment, I could barely remember a thing he told me. FML

#18961286
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30300) - you deserved it (3036)

On 01/31/2012 at 3:17pm - health - by louie (woman) - United States (Oregon)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: