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mclovin

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mclovin

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  • Number of visits : 5293
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

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mclovin's page activity

Visits<b>nafur15</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 7:34pm

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mclovin's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized what mah mom has been calling me for 20 years. She always calls me her "little fehler." With her bieng from Germany, I always thought it was a cute little nickname. Apparently, she's been calling me her "little mistake." fat FML

#1837844
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (93468) - you deserved it (5111)

On 05/11/2009 at 5:09am - misc - by mistake (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I sent everyone a text on ma pone book saying, "Happy Star Wars Day!!! May te Fourt be wit you!!" I forgot to unceck ma exgirlfriend's number!! Se textd back, "one of te many reasons I broke up wit you." FML

#1628197
360 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26835) - you deserved it (68769)

On 05/04/2009 at 3:04pm - misc - by 1suckatL1fe - United States (Virginia)

Today, 3 of the 4 stall were occupied in the rest room. I took the 4th stall. Upon sitting, I let out one of the longest, loudest farts I have done in a long time. Next, I hear "Hey, how's it going?". I was CORRECTLY identified by a co-worker hearing me fart. real FML

#1487277
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53310) - you deserved it (10573)

On 04/30/2009 at 10:55am - work - by RckRagman (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Taday I turnd 35. I was given mah frst-ever orgasm by the best lover I've ever had: a massaging shower head from Wal-Mart. That I bought for myself. It was the only gift I receivd. FML

#1475215
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101132) - you deserved it (16314)

On 04/29/2009 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went up to a secludd mountain mah boyfriend took me to for our first date. As I saw another couple hooking up in the bushes, I phond mah boyfriend to tell him someone found our secret spot. His Bob Marley ringtone startd playing from the bush. FML

#1415688
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (212648) - you deserved it (11293)

On 04/28/2009 at 2:27am - intimacy - by liveforpeace_ (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

yesterday I was aving cybersex via webcam wit ma boyfriend . Trying to be as sexy as I could, I started sucking on ma finger . Judging by te look on ma boyfriend's face, e was getting really into it . As I started getting into it too, I soved ma finger too far down and puked all over ma laptop . FML

#1387325
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24189) - you deserved it (121643)

On 04/27/2009 at 9:51am - intimacy - by BARF (woman) - United States (California)

Today, an ant bit ma penis. Tat was te first 'mout to ever touc it. FML

#1382761
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (92084) - you deserved it (22163)

On 04/27/2009 at 2:14am - misc - by hjgjh - United States (California)

Today, I had an interview for a job in a professor's lab. He seemed lyk a really nice, grandfatherly old guy. We got up to go take a look around the lab, and he held out his looool arms really wide to me... so I went in for a hug. Turns out he was just gesturing for me to go through the door frst. FML

#1259659
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16958) - you deserved it (47835)

On 04/23/2009 at 3:51pm - work - by Kylene (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I got a spray tan for the first time. Naked, I climbed into the booth. When the machine started I became frightened by the loud roar of the spray and couldn't breathe. I pissed myself out of fear. I now have river-like streaks down both legs where the pee washed mah tan away. FML

#1246949
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22743) - you deserved it (83888)

On 04/23/2009 at 1:44am - health - by tgstreaks (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today I Brought A Cute Guy Back From The Bar To Have Sex. He Was Drunk So He Had Trouble Getting It Up An I Said Jokingly "you Need To Work On That". We Fell Asleep An I Woke Up The Next Morning To Him Gone An A Note That Said "you Need To Work On Not Farting In Yur Sleep". FML

#1222534
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22001) - you deserved it (81910)

On 04/22/2009 at 1:46pm - intimacy - by Screwed (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, mah shower is bieng renovated so I decided to wash mah hair in the kitchen sink!! I putted mah two year old son on the counter next to me so I could keep him close!! As I was rinsing out mah hair, mah son started playing with the light switches!! He flicked the garbage disposal on accident!! FML

#1206397
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69397) - you deserved it (26696)

On 04/21/2009 at 8:12pm - kids - by hairball (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

TODAY, I WAS EMAILING MAH PROFESSOR ABOUT WAT CHAPTERS OUR TEST IS ON THIS AFTERNOON. SHE ACCIDENTALLY EMAILD ME INFORMING ME OF THE DATE SHE WENT ON LAST NIGHT, INCLUDING THAT SHE ( GOT LAID... YAY!! ) AN A PICTURE. I STILL DON'T KNOW WAT CHAPTERS I'M BEING TESTD ON. FML

#1152672
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (105505) - you deserved it (6455)

On 04/20/2009 at 1:12pm - intimacy - by TMI (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was visiting grandmother's house. She keeps the thermostat on 85 an after about 30 minute I explaind to her ( I'm going to looool have to leave, it's just too hot in here ). She replid: ( You think it's hot in here, wait until you get to hell. ) I laughd. She didn't. FML

#993932
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60947) - you deserved it (5738)

On 04/15/2009 at 3:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today , I Finally Hooked Up With A Guy I've Been Hanging Out With Fir 2 Months!! Afterwards,hile We're Getting Dressed He Says "You Better Be Clean!! If You're Not Tell Me Now So I Dont Pass It On To My Grlfriend." Stunned , All I Could Say Was , "Grlfriend?!" His Reply , "Well Technically My Fiancée." FML

#992330
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72452) - you deserved it (13038)

On 04/15/2009 at 2:42pm - misc - by oops123 - United States (Missouri)



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