Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Dr_Pepper

Search for a member

Dr_Pepper
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 26054
  • Number of comments : 195
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Dr_Pepper's last visitors

Rizzenms_fancypantsFreezesweet_candy_sugarnspiceebobby_salcedo5redrovaaJessKrazeEmilyroxx

Dr_Pepper's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Dr_Pepper's favorite FMLs

Today, I received a 4 page text message from my mom explaining what she was going to do to me tonight in full detail. I am one name below her boyfriend on her contact list. FML

#6094317
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25344) - you deserved it (1967)

On 11/01/2009 at 12:35am - intimacy - by Nomoretexting (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I received a 4 page text message from my mom explaining what she was going to do to me tonight in full detail. I am one name below her boyfriend on her contact list. FML

#6094317
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25344) - you deserved it (1967)

On 11/01/2009 at 12:35am - intimacy - by Nomoretexting (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I received a 4 page text message from my mom explaining what she was going to do to me tonight in full detail. I am one name below her boyfriend on her contact list. FML

#6094317
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25344) - you deserved it (1967)

On 11/01/2009 at 12:35am - intimacy - by Nomoretexting (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. After about five minutes, he sneezes violently on me. I don't know what's worse, him getting snot all over my intimate bits or the fact that the sneeze felt better then what he was doing. FML

#6089895
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19356) - you deserved it (2362)

On 10/31/2009 at 8:22pm - intimacy - by thornrose22 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at my school's Midnight Madness, I was selected to show my school spirit in a contest. Being drunk, I decided to hump the school mascot in front of 300 people. FML

#6065931
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5802) - you deserved it (45287)

On 10/30/2009 at 1:11am - misc - by skyhawk13 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got home from work and heard the shower in my bathroom running. Thinking my wife was taking a shower, I got completely undressed and walked in. My wife wasn't in the shower, instead I found my daughter and her boyfriend in the shower, making out. There was an awkward moment of silence. FML

#5974378
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28875) - you deserved it (7979)

On 10/24/2009 at 1:35pm - intimacy - by sad_dad (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got home from work and heard the shower in my bathroom running. Thinking my wife was taking a shower, I got completely undressed and walked in. My wife wasn't in the shower, instead I found my daughter and her boyfriend in the shower, making out. There was an awkward moment of silence. FML

#5974378
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28875) - you deserved it (7979)

On 10/24/2009 at 1:35pm - intimacy - by sad_dad (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I took my first Viagra. It worked great, but "Wally, the one-eyed wonder-weasel" would not return to "hiding". After 4 hours, I was in mortal aching pain, and went to my doctor for a shot and sedative. My wife, the doctor, and the nurse could not stifle their laughter. FML

#5938772
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14336) - you deserved it (5407)

On 10/22/2009 at 12:07am - intimacy - by ItsFunnyNow (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was in a work meeting because our clientele is unhappy with our service. I was in there because I don't correct our customers when they get my name wrong. My name is Blane, but "Blair", "Blake", "Lane", and "Glenn" got rave reviews. No one picked up on this. I hate my job. FML

#5840446
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19668) - you deserved it (3179)

On 10/15/2009 at 8:33am - work - by Blanerd (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I locked my keys in my car. My spare keys are 45 minutes away in my dorm room. My dorm room keys are attached to my car keys locked in my car. Security said they would let me in as long as I had my school ID. It's on my keychain. FML

#5815091
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22292) - you deserved it (6349)

On 10/13/2009 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)

Today, I got back from vacation and realised I still had the motel key. The key-ring has the address on it, so you can post it back to them. I drove to the postbox and posted the key. I then discovered that the motel key won't start my car. FML

#5425393
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13649) - you deserved it (34277)

On 09/23/2009 at 9:15am - misc - by fmlxxxx (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I went on a blind date. We had agreed on meeting in front of a park. Thinking I was there first, I texted her "I'm already there, sitting next to the fat chick." I heard a beep. SHE was the "fat chick." FML

#5292418
331 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18257) - you deserved it (88275)

On 09/16/2009 at 2:23pm - love - by sarahh38 (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I learned that you can pierce your balls. However, sitting on a thumbtack is not the best way to find this out. FML

#5096341
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45878) - you deserved it (6231)

On 09/07/2009 at 12:57am - misc - by Ballshurt (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at a party when I got covered in the liquid from a glow stick. Thinking it wasn't a big deal I went to rub it off, but it stuck to my clothes. The cops came so everyone ran and hid in the bushes because we were all drunk. The cops arrested fifteen people because I glowed. FML

#5063911
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13475) - you deserved it (39588)

On 09/05/2009 at 4:54pm - misc - by Idiots (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was in an unfamiliar building on campus and I needed to use the bathroom before class started. I walked in and saw a man at the sink. I said "Oh my god I'm sorry! I thought this was the women's washroom." It was. The very butch looking woman gave me a look of death. FML

#4957088
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33289) - you deserved it (7494)

On 08/31/2009 at 5:18pm - misc - by Cherie (woman) - United States (Illinois)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: