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The all-time greatest FMLs

What happened next?

By Broke boy - 26/06/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, I was in a public toilet stall and realized too late that there was no toilet paper left on the roll. I had to awkwardly shuffle around in a panic, knocking on the stall walls to ask for help. The guy in the next stall over gruffly said, “Dude, be a man, just use a sock or something.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 126

Family matters

By Anonymous - 31/05/2026 12:00 - United States - Graham

Today, I found out that my uncle, who is still married to my aunt, is trying to seduce my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 61

Betrayed

By Bitches - 16/07/2026 03:00 - Romania - Bucharest

Today, my girlfriend called me a "controlling, overbearing psychopath." What did I do? I found out her best friend is trying to persuade her to cheat on me and I demanded she cut her friend off. I'm better off single, I know, but it still hurts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 89

Starfish

By Spice it up - 06/03/2026 03:00

Today, my girlfriend complained that I don't initiate sex much anymore. The only way she will have sex is at night, lights out, covers on, TV turned up, and no foreplay or anything. It's so fucking boring, I'd rather just watch TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 110

Good boy

By Anonymous - 17/05/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I spent 45 minutes getting my toddler into a cute outfit for family photos. As soon as we arrived at the photographer's studio, he made direct eye contact with me, pulled off his pants, and ran screaming into the background of someone else's shoot. He's never looked happier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 181

Holy crap

By Anonymous - 14/07/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, I’m at my third ER visit in a week for an extremely painful ovarian cyst. The people next to me are reading aloud from a Christian Science book. I’m in hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 94

Overenthusiastic

By Anonymous - 09/06/2025 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I tried to pick my wife up and put her on the worktop for some oral fun, and when I say "tried" I mean I failed. My back spasmed for the first time in my life and I sort of threw her into the fridge door. I’m now in agony, she’s mad that I “think she’s fat”, and the fridge has a dent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 138

Idiot tax

By Dumbass - 16/11/2025 20:00

Today, my boyfriend came home, complaining about not having enough money for bills. He then pulled a stack of lottery tickets out of his bag, saying, "I hope one of these wins." FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 87

To be fair and balanced…

By Anonymous - 01/01/2026 00:00

Today, I found out my husband is still friends with someone who talks a lot of crap about me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 86

Coming or going

By Anonymous - 21/05/2026 09:00 - United States - Rowlett

Today, my job transfer was canceled literally as we were getting in the U-Haul. While my kids celebrate that they don't have to leave their friends and everything, my wife and I are fighting like cats and dogs over the huge mess this shit created. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 58

Hangry boy

By Anonymous - 17/01/2024 22:00 - Germany

Today, my mom’s greedy cat stole some milk I had left on the countertop, completely undeterred by the fact that not only was the milk in a plastic bag, it was also frozen solid. Yep, he actually managed to eat it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 148

Knock yourself out

By Anonymous - 10/08/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, my package with two brand new toys got delivered to the wrong apartment. Somewhere in this apartment complex, a stranger is either judging me or having the best day of their life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 103

Handle with care

By Frankly - 26/06/2024 16:00 - United States

Today, my dad and two of his hunting buddies started a true crime podcast. It's as bad as you can imagine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 124

Don't follow your dreams, kids!

By Anonymous - 06/07/2025 20:00 - Belgium - Schelle

Today, after years of study and hard work, I fulfilled my long time dream of becoming a neurologist. Too bad it took me so long to figure out I absolutely hate working in a hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 138

That was quick

By Anonymous - 13/02/2026 22:00

Today, my ex started dating the girl he kept telling me not to worry about. We broke up three hours ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 68

Family man

By Anonymous - 05/05/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, we were planning to go out to dinner at our favorite restaurant. My kids and I were all dressed and ready to go when my husband waltzes in with fast food. He said he found some coupons for a free family meal. The kids and I got upset and he said, "I didn't have to get this for you guys." FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 120

Daddy issues

By Tom - 29/12/2024 00:00 - Canada - Etobicoke

Today, I ended a relationship because she told me that I was "like a father." FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 147

Don't give up

By Anonymous - 26/01/2025 12:00 - Turkey - Mamak

Today, I realized that for my entire life I haven't felt genuine romantic love for anyone, despite being with many. I've taken care of people and made them happy all the time, but in the end I never really loved anyone, except one person, but it's too late in my life to go back and change things. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 183

Neglect

By Very caring parents - 26/02/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, I'm staying at my parents' house. I was woken up by the fan in my bedroom falling down. I calmly picked it back up and went to bed, wondering why my parents weren't concerned at all. My mom said she figured it was nothing, and when my dad tried to say something, she retorted, "You didn't even wake up!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 117

Honey, I'm home!

By Anonymous - 26/11/2025 20:00

Today, I got home and found my husband, naked with an erection and my panties on his face like a mask. He claimed to be the Panty Bandit there to plunder my booty. I might have indulged his insanity and had sex with him were my mom and dad not right behind me in the doorway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 101

Agony

By I can't think of a funny username for this - 16/06/2024 16:00 - United States

Today, in my years of experience with skin problems, I've had boils appear in the most horrible spots you can imagine. Still, nothing compares to having like 4 or 5 in roughly the same area, especially if that area is somewhere hard to reach. Somewhere like the back of your neck. Welcome to my hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 64

PDA FML

By Anonymous - 13/07/2024 16:00 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, after asking my boyfriend multiple times to be more kind and romantic, he looked at me lovingly and said, "You know, you look pretty sometimes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 182

See you around, then

By Joanna B - 25/09/2025 12:00

Today, at the end of my great grandmother's funeral, her daughter (my grandma) told me and my mother that she doesn’t have a reason to come back and visit anymore, and that everyone in her life is now gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 68

Couponed off

By Uber scammed me - 12/05/2024 12:00 - Sweden - Haegersten

Today, I was going to an event with my friends and I'd told them I could pay for an Uber since I had a coupon for 70% off. It was only going to cost 5 bucks, but later I looked at my bank statement and an additional 15 bucks was taken from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 114

How romantic!

By Anonymous - 15/02/2026 09:00

Today, it’s Valentine’s Day. My boyfriend promised me that instead of a packed chain restaurant we would have “dinner under the stars.” We ended up having Slurpees and Slim Jims in the 7-Eleven parking lot. He called me ungrateful for not appreciating his “romantic gesture.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 161

Breaking news

By Anonymous - 23/11/2024 20:00 - United States

Today, I was feeling motivated to improve my unhealthy miserable life and went for a jog. Halfway through, I tripped on my own shoelace and scared a couple walking their dog. According to my wife, it's already been gossiped about in our neighborhood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 134

Bad start to the marriage

By Confusd - 21/07/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, my hopefully soon-to-be ex husband refuses to get an annulment. His female best friend, who’s been in the picture for years, rage quit our wedding and she blocked him on everything. He’s fallen into a depressed state. When we consummated our marriage he was a like zombie. He still claims he “loves me.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 117

Risky business

By Anonymous - 22/01/2026 20:00

Today, I snapped a tendon in my knee during cowgirl position. My boyfriend was “so close to finishing” that he asked if he could just slip it back inside for a few seconds while we waited for the ambulance, “since you’re already lying down, Babe.” If I could stand, I’d have hit him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 98

Bad guy, duh

By sonowwhatdoido - 13/04/2026 22:00 - United States - Greenville

Today, I was supposed to have dinner with my best guy friend, (He’s gay. It’s platonic) but he never showed up.I waited for 30 minutes in the rain, texted and called, but he’s not here. This is the day after he “pranked” me by telling me the guy I like likes me back. I have no idea what’s going on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 85

Soggy mess

By Anonymous - 30/08/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I managed to wash my phone with my laundry. I didn’t realize it was in my jeans until I heard a thudding noise. After rescuing it from the depths of soggy clothes, I tried the rice trick to dry it out. A few hours later, my cat thought it was a new litter tray and promptly pissed in the rice, then spread it all over the counter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 238

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The Top

Today, working as a massage therapist at a spa, I had a male client proposition me for “special services.” I declined and ended the session. He got angry and told the front desk that I offered him favors. Now I’m suspended while management investigates, when really it’s just his word against mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 442

You deserved it 84

Today, my boyfriend and I were laying naked in my bed making out. All of a sudden, we hear "pop goes the weasel" outside my house. My boyfriend stops and excitedly says, "ICE CREAM MAN", flips me over, grabs his clothes, and runs out of my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 530

You deserved it 81

Random

Today, my girlfriend was complaining of being stressed, so I mentioned having heard that sex relieves a lot of that build up of stress. She replied, "I think I'd rather stay stressed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 102

You deserved it 8 058

Today, while trying to sleep, I kept hearing this groan/scream for help for about an hour. I decided to call 911 to send someone to investigate. Police came, I received a $100 parking fine and another citation for improper use of 911. The noise? Just a dog howling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 650

You deserved it 13 275

Today, I found out my fiancé has been sleeping with his therapist behind my back. If that wasn't bad enough on its own, I'd talked him into starting therapy six months ago to help with his mental health troubles, and have been mostly paying for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 429

You deserved it 237

Today, an angry client emailed me at 6 a.m. about equipment for his house that's back ordered from the manufacturer until 2023. He knows we can't do anything about it and he won't let us change brands. For the next 3 hours, he sent emails, texts & voice mails, all increasingly angry since I'm "ignoring" him. It's Saturday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 881

You deserved it 93

Today, while trying to relax because I'm sick and I feel like crap, the shower head attachment fell and hit me on the head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 873

You deserved it 112

Today, my mom offered to drive us into the city after Christmas. I told her months ago that I wasn't getting in a car she was driving, because I don't trust her not to secretly drink and drive. I guess she either forgot or didn't think I meant it. Now I have to tell her again, two days before flying down there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 413

You deserved it 96