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The all-time greatest FMLs

By Anonymous - 27/05/2019 04:00

Today, I made eye-contact with a cute guy in a store. Too bad he saw me buying anti-diarrhea medicine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 794

You deserved it 229

Soaked

By SunBed - 11/05/2020 17:00

Today, I came home to my bed and most of my room soaking wet. This morning, my mom thought it would be "smart" to warm up my room by opening the skylight above my bed. There were heavy showers all day today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 794

You deserved it 114

Judge not

By Anonymous - 18/07/2020 05:01

Today, my friend dragged me out of a movie because they swore a bit and there was drug use. Apparently, she's a Mormon now, and, "doesn't want her values compromised." This from the same girl who tried to get me to try crack a few weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 794

You deserved it 245

Working in retail sucks

By Anonymous - 09/03/2020 23:00

Today, a customer yelled at me because we didn't have any laptops in stock. I work at a clothing store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 793

You deserved it 121

Rats!

By I’m screwed - 08/12/2018 15:30

Today, we’ve had a rat problem in our house for a few weeks. Recently I hid a bottle of booze in my room so my parents wouldn’t see it. But my parents saw a rat in my room and tore the whole thing apart to find it, eventually finding my bottle instead. I was literally ratted out by a rat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 793

You deserved it 2 781

It's all too much

By twistedelegance - 19/07/2019 04:00

Today, I failed my driving test, and didn't get my great new job that a buddy helped me get. He got fired, and they won't hire me because he recommended me, regardless of how qualified for the job and how great the interview went. He called to tell me an hour before my driving test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 793

You deserved it 178

Christmas is canceled

By Virginia6810 - 14/10/2019 02:00

Today, I got an email that my Amazon account was probably hacked, and they have gone ahead and canceled all orders that seemed suspicious. Two days ago I was celebrating that I'd finished Christmas shopping early. Never mind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 793

You deserved it 171

By Anonymous - 06/08/2019 20:00 - United States

Today, I was feeling sick and ended up throwing up as soon as I got home. My mother's first question was an accusatory, "What have you been drinking?" I was returning from the AA meeting I have been attending for over a month. I go because I'm afraid I'll become an alcoholic like her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 793

You deserved it 149

STI TMI

By Anonymous - 17/05/2022 22:00 - United States - Cumberland

Today, at my physical, I found out that my ex-boyfriend who broke up with me 4 months ago was not only cheating on me, but had also manage to catch chlamydia and give it to me. I'm now dating someone else, so I had to explain that I've had chlamydia for 4 months without knowing, and he should probably get tested. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 792

You deserved it 263

The miracle of barf

By EvictingItSoon - 08/03/2020 23:07

Today, what I thought was food poisoning is actually a baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 792

You deserved it 712

Nun the wiser

By Anonymous - 11/07/2021 16:01

Today, my girlfriend offered to roleplay as a sexy nun, then dumped me, claiming my saying yes meant I was attacking her catholic faith and that I’m a sick, depraved criminal. She was the one who offered. I’m not remotely interested in roleplay, I only agreed cause I thought it was her kink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 792

You deserved it 142

Dad joke number 287474

By HunkyFez - 28/08/2020 08:06 - Australia

Today, my dad offered to make me lunch as it was my first day at a new school. Today was also the day I had to eat a penis-shaped sandwich in front of my new peers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 792

You deserved it 277

Ed Gein vibes

By emeraldapostle - 17/05/2019 01:59

Today, both a coworker of mine and my boss agreed that I fit the profile of a serial killer. I don't know what's worse, the fact that they think that low of me, or the fact that this isn't the first time someone's said I remind them of a serial killer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 792

You deserved it 292