By ilovekids? - 12/12/2015 02:05 - United States - Commack
The Top
By SSS - 14/02/2019 01:00 - United Kingdom - London
By _RobotInDisguise - 09/12/2009 23:47 - United Kingdom
By BlueB - 06/07/2013 15:42 - United States
By Anonymous - 25/07/2012 01:37 - United States - Solon Springs
Pants on fire
By Anonymous - 04/12/2009 02:17 - United States
No thanks
By SadIndianLife - 15/11/2015 21:00 - India - Delhi
Blazing Saddles
By Jen - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States
By Devil's Pigeon - 18/04/2017 14:00
Eve of destruction
By Anonymous - 17/05/2019 16:31
By blasted - 25/11/2009 13:56 - United States
By ItWasHotAsBalls - 22/12/2016 00:56
By WiseGuy0481 - 19/12/2016 20:18 - United States
WiseGuy0481 tells us more.
By Ihavelike3bucks - 18/12/2016 13:51
Ihavelike3bucks tells us more.
Of course out of all the FMLs I've submitted through the years - this is the one that went through. Anyway, I'm better now! On top of that, I got hit with the flu like a truck. No laxatives, stool softeners, magnesium, enemas, etc helped and between that circle of hell I ended up going to the ER. Ended up literally tearing myself a new one with an anal fissure. I've never been constipated before so this was awful. Oh also my first day back, our entire building was shut down and we all were laid off. Happy Holidays everyone!
By moonbears - 22/10/2015 16:46 - United States - Portland
By embarrassed - 18/08/2014 16:39 - United States - Great Neck
By Wheel chair bound - 16/12/2016 21:14 - United States - Marion
By SmallTownCutie - 29/05/2019 04:13
By screwyouchris - 16/10/2015 23:08 - United Kingdom - Brighton
Cartoonish
By mr_dinzaster - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff
Grounded
By Anonymous - 08/08/2014 23:25 - Sweden - Sundsvall
Perfect
By Anonymous - 17/11/2009 02:40 - United States
By KaD - 21/05/2017 16:00
By Anonymous - 12/06/2012 11:58 - United States - Gorham
By M. Moore - 10/06/2019 18:00
Newbie
By EggBomb - 01/12/2016 18:22
By roze198765 - 04/08/2011 01:19 - United States
Major headache
By Emily 1992 - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff - United States - Klamath Falls
Drunken rampage
By Anonymous - 01/08/2011 21:47 - United States
By Anonymous - 13/07/2014 16:04 - United States - Pompano Beach
Keywords
When we were together it was constant comments about how I was barely staying afloat and "how could I take care of her if I could barely take care of myself?". I was trying everything I could to make her happy but she would not let it go. It ended up being part of the reason we split. That was almost a year ago. I now work for a great company and make really good money. I just bought my car last month. I see her coming out of the store and all those talks came shooting back into my head. I just wanted her to see me happy and doing well....ok I wanted her to feel dumb and regret splitting up. Nevertheless I blared the music and slowly rolled right into a car backing out. Luckily it barely scratched it. I saw no regret in her eyes, laughter yes, regret no. So yes I deserved it. Karma sucks.