Here comes the flood
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Gurnee
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Gurnee
By man-period? - 02/03/2016 06:48 - United States - Portland
By Bad parenting101 - 08/01/2017 03:23 - United States - Denver
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff
By Mycardoesn'tevenwork - 22/02/2016 20:16 - United States
By uninvited - 04/02/2016 15:16 - United States - Boston
By FML - 19/01/2016 06:41 - United States
By Anonymous - 08/01/2016 17:38 - Canada - Newmarket
By shelby124 - 15/08/2012 16:31 - United States - York
By meg__1798 - 09/12/2015 02:08 - United States - San Francisco
By NoBasement4U - 26/11/2015 20:24 - Canada - Medicine Hat
By Why? - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Saint Charles
By Anonymous - 31/10/2015 05:44 - Canada - London
By Countdown has begun - 16/05/2019 12:58
By seriously_CAT - 21/10/2015 02:26
By notamonkey - 14/12/2016 17:24
OP here, I didn't expect this to get posted so I made an account :) Your comments genuinely made me laugh! Since this got posted, here's some background for you: this happened to me two years ago, after I had worked for them for over a decade. While it wasn't the greatest job in the world, it felt like a calling to me. There's nothing I love more than making people (especially children) laugh. I later found out that they fired me because my boss wanted to impress his new girlfriend by giving her niece (who happens to be a chimp handler/animal trainer) a job. It was a small company and they couldn't afford to keep the both of us on, so I had to go :( But it's all good, I got lucky and found myself a similar job with better pay and benefits. :)
By vanillapudding6 - 14/10/2015 01:21 - Canada - Toronto
By ftt - 06/12/2016 15:22
By Anonymous - 28/05/2013 16:51 - United States - Ozark
By Till We Pass Out - 03/10/2015 15:30 - United Kingdom - Halifax
By Anonymous - 01/06/2017 18:00 - Australia
By MedHistory - 15/09/2015 20:40 - Canada - Laval
By leadwriteafw - 03/11/2016 18:35 - United States - Mansfield
Hey y'all OP here- I wasn't really expecting for this to get published! Just here to answer a few questions. First off, this obviously didn't just start happening today, it been an ongoing issue since February-- that's just how FML works. Secondly, I'm 17 years old which means I've been experiencing this all while in high school, which has been SUPER fun. But yes, I've had an MRI, several sonograms, lots of blood work taken and tested, and I took a very intense allergy test. The only thing all of that revealed was that I had a minor milk allergy. So I've completely cut out all milk (which FYI, you'd be surprised at how many things have milk in them), with still no change. I've tried several medications, some of which have provided their own not-so-fun side effects. But at this point I'm just trying to treat it with vitamins and by lowering my stress levels. All my friends and family know about, so I always carry a barf bag and tooth brush with me. Hopefully it will go away on its own, because it's really not as fun as it sounds. Thanks for your kind comments and helpful suggestions though!!
By happybidet - 31/10/2016 13:02 - United Kingdom
By Jen - 20/10/2016 16:32
By love you too honey boo - 13/01/2020 05:00
By cannotexplain - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Australia
By Braceyourself - 25/09/2016 05:44 - United States - San Pablo
By doggone - 05/05/2012 23:07 - United States - King Of Prussia
By Eddy - 27/08/2017 16:00
Keywords
Hey guys its me OP, To clarify, my mom told me that she was planning to do this only if the Heimlich maneuver did not work. I was choking on the chip pretty badly and could not breathe so she was thinking about the worst possible scenario. Luckily, I got it out and I am fine and no throats were cut. (This time). When she told me about her (bad) plan to perform a tracheotomy I told her about the scene with Sandra Bullock in The Heat and the dangers of doing one without training (and that TV does not count as training). I also may have mentioned that I would rather choke out and die than have my throat cut open with a steak knife on the kitchen floor.... Thanks for all of your comments! -OP