Today, I was pickpocketed. I didn't realize until I stopped to get breakfast. I went back home to see that my dog had taken my wallet and had ripped and torn it up. I was pickpocketed by my own dog. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I gave a short presentation at a neighborhood watch event to raise awareness about pickpocketing and to give tips on how to avoid becoming a victim of it. After I got back home, I realized my wallet was missing from my pocket. FML
Today, I was taking my dog for a walk and got robbed at knifepoint. The robber made away with my phone, cash, and debit cards… and the French Bulldog I’m still making monthly payments for. FML
Today, I got mugged while walking my dog. He seemed to be OK with it. FML
Today, I took my dog to the park. While chatting with another dog owner, my dog managed to steal their sandwich and ran off with it. I had to chase my sandwich-thieving dog through the entire park. FML
Today, I tripped over my dog while carrying groceries. As I laid on the floor surrounded by smashed eggs, spilled milk, and a bruised knee, my dog stole the bread from the bag and and ran off. FML
Today, I went to retrieve my stolen wallet from a train station. After I collected it, I returned to the place where I'd parked my bike, only to find that my bike had been stolen. FML
Today, the police called because someone had turned in my wallet that was stolen. I happily drove home only to find that my house had been robbed and ransacked. FML
Today, I went to eat out. When I sat down, I realized I forgot my straw. I took my purse with me, not wanting it to get stolen. Someone stole my food instead. FML
Today, I woke up to find out my house was robbed. He didn't steal anything of value, but he stole my beer, dog, and cat. FML
Today, I went to pick up my dog from the vet after she had surgery. I somehow managed to lock my keys, my purse, and my dog in the car. FML
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Top comments
leopardwilliam 22
Maybe you should rethink the bacon wallet
c_wyld 21
Man that's ruff. He couldn't at least throw you a bone, I mean c'mon its Monday...
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Comments (55)
RAH94 17
What a ruff day
Charles900 16
Once had my dog completely tear apart a 20 dollar bill in my pocket. I hope your money is at least intact, OP.
mld4657 28
your dog's a dick
Jujuboo_3 25
Doggy got some skills. Take him around town with you(:
truecountrybitch 22
stupid tanner!
amileah13 26
Oh goodness :/ let's hope he didn't tear up or chew any money up!
Ice_Cold_Llama 17
You deserved it m8
Mooglefox 23
Your dog didn't try to be an ID thief, huh?
wyverntail 15
Clearly he wanted to have the luxuries of being human.
germanballs 8
So you stopped to get breakfast without your wallet? Hmm.
Paws_Cat 29
That's not so bad actually. Just as long as the things inside are alright, that's a lot better than it being gone.