loveless
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I surprised my girlfriend with U2 tickets. Still no action. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
TheComedyAudio
Today, I surprised my girlfriend of 3 years with Stone Sour and Korn tickets, since I knew how badly she wanted to go. She responded by asking if we could go as just friends. FML
LD619
United States
Today, I gave my ex-girlfriend two concert tickets to show her I still care about her and want to win her back. She sold them. FML
Voice29
United States
Today, I bought my girlfriend two tickets to a Broadway show that was coming through town she really wanted to see. I couldn't attend with her due to work so she said she would take her mom. I found out later she took her ex. Now they're back together, and I paid for the date that made it happen. FML
fmylovelife
United States
Today, I surprised my girlfriend with roses. She surprised me by getting back together with her ex. FML
sostupid
United States
Today, my friend and I drove three hours to attend a U2 concert. We had been psyched about the tickets for weeks because they were awesome seats (my early Christmas present). After a long drive, we get to the venue and I realize in horror that I left tickets at home, on my desk, three hours away. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I was going to surprise my boyfriend at his family birthday celebration with a $2,000 trip he's always wanted, Ireland. Right before my gift, he had opened his mother's gift, an envelope containing a plane ticket. Guess where it was going? FML
MollyMoodle7
United Kingdom
Today, my boyfriend bought me Kings of Leon tickets for my birthday. Since he thought I was irresponsible, he gave the tickets to his mum so I wouldn't lose them. The show is today, and we can't find the tickets. FML
feeling fed up
Dundee, United Kingdom
Today, I spent hundreds of pounds buying my best friend concert tickets to see our favourite band, complete with a meet and greet. I drove over very excited to pick her up to take her. She had already left. With her boyfriend. FML
fuckyou
🌶️ Spicy
Opportunity knocks
Today, my girlfriend took me to see my favorite band live. Afterwards, we were lucky enough to run into the lead guitarist, who promptly asked her if she'd like to go back to his hotel room. She accepted. FML
Anonymous
Chagrin Falls, United States
Today, it's my girlfriend's birthday. To celebrate, I spent the day with her and then took her out to a really nice dinner. She is currently giving me the silent treatment because I didn't write "Happy Birthday" on her Facebook wall. FML
Top comments
diet_otaku 0
seriously. if you want sex just ask for it. girls are not obligated to respond to gifts with sexual favors.
jchansfan 0
LOL Who cares you get to see U2 w/ your girlfriend! =) But I really hope that's not the main reason you bought the tickets lol, somethings even Bono can't make happen... :P Either way this FML is great... =)
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Comments (138)
jchansfan 0
LOL Who cares you get to see U2 w/ your girlfriend! =) But I really hope that's not the main reason you bought the tickets lol, somethings even Bono can't make happen... :P Either way this FML is great... =)
redbluegreen 40
Dude, hush up. It's U[*******]2! She should've been the butter to your toast and let you spread her.
allmidnighteyes 10
Yeah, Rach, split that open like you're slowly pulling apart a week-old grilled cheese sammich.
Intoxicunt 5
I was thinking more like pulling the pepperonis off a pizza. /Has a U2 ad to the right now. I guess OP's girl is going to be a groupie instead.
redbluegreen 40
Dude, no. Pepperoni's off a pizza? Your foreplay must be really awkward. I'm all about the butter man. ALL ABOUT THE BUTTER!
jchansfan 0
o_O'... I can't keep up with you kids and you're dirty metaphores... lol :P
redbluegreen 40
Would you like to take a test drive? Around the block...?
allmidnighteyes 10
Only if I can blow your manual tranny.
DrunkenValor 0
I'd love to parralel park you, Rachel. Find a nice tight spot.
Intoxicunt 5
I'm more of a hotdog person. Can I pop your hood? (Hood is a part of female genitalia, by the way. I learned this when my friend pierced hers.....)
redbluegreen 40
I have more of a thing for funnel cakes...
Jessica_Carnage 0
Haha, if you're young, that's why you didn't get any action. U2. Really? But if you're old, then your life sucks, lol.
geekplaya 0
yeaa funnel cakes. i wanna buy you at a carnival and eat you with a fork and realized i just ate really crappy leftover hot dog buns recycled and mushed together with some dandruff on top
DrunkenValor 0
Only I may do that to Rachel, you git.
brkn_hearted 0
geek and playa do NOT mix you fucknut. psycho creepy stalker much though? :D
catwest8686 0
HAHAHA U2 SUCKS!
dhall30 8
As a certified grammar nazi I would like to inform you that you probably meant to say "your" instead of "you're". To clarify, this comment is directed at commenter number seven.
dementxrs 12
56: shut the hell up man, u2 is awesome! mate, my boyfriend would get sex for 10 years straight if he got me u2 tickets!
shakenbake93 0
I would give you some action if you took me to U2.
White667 0
I love this FML: Short, Sweet and to the point. Literally every guy is thinking "Jeeze, what a prude" and all the girls are "Well with an attitude like that.."
izsy9667 0
I went to the U2 concert in chicago, if your girlfriend doesn't appreciate that, then dum her.
evilspongebob 0
i agree that concert was badass. beware though.... bono might hit it before you
osnapp55 0
woot fifth. lol i am no troll. u2 sucks but just wait till u get to the consert ;•)
kitkatt978 5
your a troll. just face it
GreggHutch 0
You're*
metalguy95 11
*concert
xx_Ashleigh_xx 0
I cant belive u is that all u care about ******* hell she probly loves the tickets but u still have to repect her
DataWhore 0
you are an ass, I hope and pray she never gives it to you!
jonnymohio 2
Surprise her with a ring, if still no action, then you really are screwed.
diet_otaku 0
seriously. if you want sex just ask for it. girls are not obligated to respond to gifts with sexual favors.
imhope 23
Exactly.
Einstein714 0
u2 tickets are butter on her biscuit, and everyone likes buttered biscuits and gravy(you)
Akber1223 0
who's U2? lol