Today, at the Mommy and Me dance class that I take my four year old daughter to, the instructor had us do a stretch, telling us to pretend we're mermaids. My daughter said to me, "But you're not a mermaid, you're a whale!" FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Today, I babysat for two little girls, who wanted to play 'mermaids'. I smiled, and said that I would love to play with them. The older girl laughed, saying "You can't be a mermaid. Mermaids are pretty." FML
Today, I took my 4-year-old daughter to the local pool for swim lessons. As we walked onto the deck she turned to me and said "Mom, that lady has really big boobs!" The whole pool heard, even the man my daughter was referring to. FML
Today, I got chewed out by a parent for putting her kid underwater. I teach swim lessons. FML
Today, I dyed my hair purple. I came out of the salon and a little girl walked past and said, "Wow, you look like a mermaid!", to which her mother quickly said, "No she doesn't, she looks like her parents don't love her." FML
Stop that now
Today, I saw my 4 year-old daughter singing and dancing, so I decided to sing along. As soon as I started singing she said, without blinking her eyes and super calmly, "Could you please stop doing that?" FML
Today, I took my two-year-old daughter swimming. While sitting in the hot tub, my daughter pointed to the elderly man sitting across from us and mumbled something. I couldn't understand her, so I asked her to repeat it. After two more attempts, she shouted, "MOM! He has big boobs!" FML
Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML
Today, I overheard my 5 year old daughter call a girl in her dance class a slut. Shocked, I asked her where she heard that word. Her response: "I heard you and Daddy say it about her Mommy." FML
Cheers
Today, I had to help my little sister do a first-grade project for school. For one part, they have to draw a picture of their role model. She drew a whale, and I asked, "A whale is your role model?" She laughed and said, "No! It's you!" FML
Today, while working as a swim instructor, I started singing the hokey pokey to get all the kids used to putting their faces in the water. One of the kids was covering his ears. When I asked him why, he said "because you were singing." He's 3. FML
Top comments
mmmskittles 3
kids are so perceptive these days...
I_iz_B_a_troll 23
Aww, how cute!(:
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Comments (155)
Aerious 0
59, Dory can speak whale too.
jman730 0
You should have taken your daughter outside and chin checked her. Even if you're on the heavy side, that blows if your daughter has the audacity to say that in public.
chosha_fml 26
That was mean, even at her age.
TheWorldGreatest 8
I think she was trying to be funny, not so much a insult.
matttheman33 0
id take that as a complimant. wales are awsome
DarkJoy_fml 5
What does the UK have to do with this FML?
jannie22 0
thts pretty mean
bossybella 0
lol omg
AnneFTW 17
I hate reading FMLs about fat people looking for sympathy. It's your own fault you're overweight, stop trying to find ways to justify it. YDI.
green_ghost_fml 4
Tell your daughter it's rude to comment on people's weight and leave it at that.
shinydragonmist 0
what are your measurments