Empathy black hole

By shellbom - 17/11/2009 21:33 - United Kingdom

Today, I rang British Gas to cancel my boiler cover, as I'm totally and utterly skint. I told her the reason was I was getting divorced, moving house, losing my job, and had no income at all. She was very sympathetic, and said, "How would you like to pay your £37 cancellation fee?" FML
I agree, your life sucks 28 896
You deserved it 4 039
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Top comments

xCrackerx 3

I'll translate for you, #2. Clearly you don't understand English. I'll try Ebonics. Today, I holla'd at my gas company to cancel my plan, cuz I'm broke as ****. I told her my baby momma was leavin' me, bouncing up outta my crib, I ain't gettin no mo' chedda from my job and I got nothin' in the bank. She was all sad for me and shit, and she said, "Yo, how you wanna pay yo damn cancellation fee?" FML.

153 10
ShaunathinShavis 0

There is more British jargon in this fml alone than I have heard in the last year

124 6

Comments

rawr_ima_bear 0

£=pound. €=euro. Pounds are worth more than euros, i think. A euro is worth about 2.2 times as much as a dollar, while a pound is worth about 2.5 times as much as a dollar. 37x2.5=92.5. £37 is worth about $92.50

1 0
arienh4 0

Swing and a miss. 1 pound is approximately 1.68 dollars, and £37 is about $62.

0 0
gameoverman_fml 0

US dollars, I presume. Other countries use dollars too.

0 0
avoidthegirl 6

This is to #8 since FML apparently hates me right now: rang, skint, moving house, and wtf is a boiler cover?

3 7
hornetchik 0

Oh well, turns out North America ISN'T the centre of the world, so figure it out for yourself.

2 4
zawed 1

To #38 Rang: Called. Skint: Broke, poor. Moved house: Moving into a different house. Boiler cover: Insurance for the boiler. It's not that really hard to understand. =)

3 0
KayleeFrye 39

Whenever I have an attack of low self-esteem, I read the comments people make on FML. It reminds me how many ignorant and stupid people there are in the world, and at least I don't live with my head up my ass like a lot of the people who visit this site. I feel better about myself, but then I get depressed again because most of the ignorant, stupid people in the world seem to live in the good old US of A. Wake up, America, we don't rule the world. Not everyone uses the same language and slang as we do. It doesn't mean that they are wrong.

15 1
lostfaithinpppl 19

The words of wisdom! Thank you! OP, I feel sorry for you. Just hang in there.

1 0
caitlinmc14 1

Agree with KayleeFrye & ovrwhlmdbystupid, etc. Okay Americans, please stop making us look like morons. The only word that may have been remotely difficult to understand in this post was "skint." Whose meaning isn't really that hard to figure out, given context clues and whatnot. I didn't know what it meant, but I can reasonably guess that it means something along the lines of not having adequate funds. God, no wonder everyone says America as a country is stupid.

5 1
Witchcraft_fml 4

Well...it's not like it's her decision whether or not you pay your fee. She's a phone-jockey. However, you could have started screaming at her, made odd clicking noises, and finally knocked yourself over the head in a plea of insanity.

0 0
perdix 29

Witchy, Could you translate this story for us poor, ignorant Yanks? I found that "boiler cover" is insurance for your boiler, so if the OP is losing her house, why would she continue to pay insurance on the boiler in it? Is something missing in translation, or is the OP just a dumb ass?

1 2
arienh4 0

Why would she be losing her house? She said 'moving house' which simply means moving to somewhere else.

2 1
perdix 29

Whether she is "moving" house or "losing" house, she is still not going to be involved with that house's heating system, so why would she continue insuring it? But thanks for bringing up the irrelevant issue of how she is leaving her house.

2 2
flying_vegan 0

British Gas often let you carry your insurance plan over when you move house, so she could be referring to that.

2 0
Witchcraft_fml 4

My comments keep disappearing. Anyway, what I said was that she was canceling it, so...don't know. :]

0 0
mcwildcat8230 0

Wow waste of life, and the ******* British ones are ******* stupid because they use words like skint which are ******* dumb

1 17
uppitybitch 0

They call them 'panties' in America, or so I've heard. It's us Australians who call them underpants.

0 3
Brooklynxman 0

HOLY BRITISH SLANG BATMAN! If I translated that right then that sucks bro.

2 1
anonymous69_fml 0

I read this olll with o British occent

2 5
flying_vegan 0

English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, English accent, IT'S NOT A ******* BRITISH ACCENT IT'S AN ENGLISH ACCENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 Unless you somehow managed to do an accent that is equal parts English, Scottish, Welsh and Northern Irish, it's not an British accent.

3 2
riceicle1 6

Don't forget Geordie, Yorkshire, Scouser (Liverpudlian), Somerset, Brummy , Black Country , Classic Queens Posh, Cornish, Oxford-y, Cockney, Northumbrian, Cumbrian, Sussex and Essex And that's just a FEW of the English ones alone.

2 2
FerrariCake 2

No one in the US (or "the colonies" to you Brits) has the slightest clue as to what you're talking about.

0 14
stridercab 12

Thank you #48...they claim to have spawned the whole damn English language, yet no one knows how to ****** use it...

0 12
Esnedon 0

Wow, I'm not even British and I know what insurance cover is. Does one word really make a difference? Even if you ignored 'skint', you would still get a rather detailed idea of the story. @stridercab: THEY don't know how to use it? Americans were the ones who actually changed it around. Just because everyone knows your slang doesn't mean they can't use theirs in everyday activities.

8 1
stridercab 12

but they're slang SUCKS BRITISH DONKEY BALLS...Get with it. America spawned all the good shit.

0 9
whut 0

They are slang sucks donkey balls? If you're going to claim that no one knows how to use it, at least get it right yourself.

1 0
stridercab 12

Holy Shit...who the hell cares?!? You Brits have THE SHITTIEST FML's...

0 8
Lydia1749 0

That's because our lives are great! American FMLs are funny because your lives ARE ******.

3 1