Today, I found out that my mother has been seeing my maths teacher. I'm still failing his class. FML
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College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, after a conference with my teacher who had previously accused me of not doing my homework, she finally discovered she'd been losing it all this time. I've been getting straight Fs for a month. FML
Today, disappointed with my results on a mathematics test, I went over it and realized my teacher had added up the marks incorrectly, leaving me with 17% less than I earned. The person who's supposed to be teaching me math can't even perform basic arithmetic. FML
Today, I cheated on my math exam. I still failed. FML
Today, I learned, 90 horrifying minutes into a college exam, that my 85-year-old calculus teacher had spent the last three weeks teaching us the wrong chapter. FML
Today, I walked into my new maths class. I stepped inside only to be yelled at by the teacher for nearly 15 minutes. I was then told never to enter her class again and was sent to the principal. My identical twin brother was in her class the period before me. He also has a thing for older women. FML
Today, I came home to find my dad crying. Turns out my parents are getting divorced because my mom had an affair. With a teacher at my school. A female teacher. And the school isn't going to fire her because she's a good teacher. Every day at school I'm going to have to see her. FML
Today, I passed my math test with flying colors. My dad thought I had cheated, so he emailed the school and told them that I had. They lowered my grade. FML
Today, I found out that my mother was having an affair with my boss "to help me keep my job" because she thought I was useless. FML
Today, I found out my mom is the nude model for an art class at my college. FML
Today, my maths teacher, who hates me ever since I pointed out a mistake he made a few months ago, rang my dad and blatantly lied to him about me swearing at him in class. It was a complete load of bollocks, but my dad believed him and took away my PlayStation until after Christmas. FML
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Top comments
Cinn_fml 23
Good on your teacher for not feeling an obligation to break the rules because he's dating your mum. Maybe you should ask for help if you're failing.
Alzied 0
FYL for wanting to rely on your mom for your grades.
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Comments (286)
ellephaba101 0
FIRST!
pepsie_fml 0
ydi for bein stupid and failing math
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
1mom+1teacher=FAIL
mattman1994 0
just hope they don't multiply
Cinn_fml 23
I think you're about to start off a whole thread of maths based puns and chat-up lines. :P
ThePwnapple 0
Why don't you go out with your teacher too!
zp5 4
say "I'll get my mom to have awesome sex with you if you give me an A for the rest of the year."
purpleamandapand 6
haha yeah, add one boy, plus one girl. subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and just hope you don't multiply ;)
NightSkyx 0
48 win lol
twinny_sc 13
You're still failing, because your mom fails at sex.
GrEaT_BaMbInO 0
59 is awesome. the funniest thing I've seen on this sight
DudeImBetter 0
It's also obvious that your failing English maybe you should check with your Englishs teacher op. Unless people in the uk actually say maths teacher.
Spastastic 6
87 -- people in the UK do say "maths teacher", as a matter of fact.
mattman1994 0
87 "maths" is used in every English speaking country except the U.S because were wierd like that
mexicutioner123 0
3 some?
DudeImBetter 0
wow that's weird maths just sounds weird. It just doesn't roll off your tongue.
hockeyplayer82 0
103- I agree it doesn't sound right and it sounds like multiple math's to me just weird
omfgrofl1337 0
103, they think we sound weird too
purpleamandapand 6
thanks 86 (: haha
ShadyFTW1 0
lol 19 and 48 win. and 64 u beat me to it
firecopy 6
we should all just say mathematics so we don't confuse each other.
Sydknee 8
Maths is used in a lot of European countries.
purpleamandapand 6
96- we don't say "maths" here in Canada either. I think it's just a European thing .
mak3_1t_ra1n 0
your failing at maths(?) because ur mom fails in bed. ask ur dad. he'll tell ya. oh wait...
iHOOT4Hooters 0
OP, tell your teacher that you need the extra tutoring instead of him "tutoring" your mom.
chippa 24
Yeah, 96, what 175 said. I live in Canada too and we just say "Math." Of course, it could vary throughout the country, I'm not sure. But you're still wrong about it being "only America." :P
do20ss 4
tell her to get your grade up....anyway she can. if ya get what I mean, n I think ya get what I mean COLTS
cusof 0
"You don't say much don't you?" ... "AAHAAHUUUUUH HUUUUH"
StrictlyMCH 0
u can get it
GavinRoskamp 0
North America = Math. Europe + Australia = Maths.
TheNewGuy03 29
well, that's a huge plus. |the kid|
ellephaba101 0
Why did my comment get moderated??
mikeyb102 0
we're* grammar nazi fail
Alzied 0
FYL for wanting to rely on your mom for your grades.
cabbitt 0
Agreed #2. You get the grade you earn OP.
penguins17 0
tell ur mom to tryhard in bed then
Notimetobleed 14
mega douche bag #2
Spencer2597 10
I'm guessing OP is failing english too?
cnorris31 2
I think u should ask your to bang the English teacher instead
Cinn_fml 23
I think you guys should learn how to use Google.
sulitak 27
so according to #254 the OP should get better grades because of his mom dating the teacher. sorry, when I worked when I got grades, and when I slacked I got bad. That's how school SHOULD be
TheZigg 8
I agree. OP is a total dumbass. How can you even fail a maths class? How could anyone be that stupid?
XxBlackamusPrime 5
oh
XxBlackamusPrime 5
son of a bitch! I wrote "oh" so I cud be first! **** you all!
XxBlackamusPrime 5
who is the loser,tool, d1ck face who moderated me… within 5 seconds of the post?
xNephilim 19
It's also not the OP's fault. Some people just don't get math, no matter how hard they study. And some people just have a bad teacher. Before you say anything... Yes, teachers have a lot to do with the grades their students get. Not only because they grade their stuff (duh) but also because of the way they're teaching. I used to have a really bad teacher in math and failed. This year, I have a good teacher and a 90 average.
ToastyXD 0
Well look at it on the bright side. she could sleep with your English teacher so you know that it's math and not maths... If you want the "s" use mathematics.
slackinc 0
Shut up 195. Some countries use "Maths". Open your mind and stop living in your tiny restricted world.
Cinn_fml 23
Good on your teacher for not feeling an obligation to break the rules because he's dating your mum. Maybe you should ask for help if you're failing.
suppressed08 2
Totally agree. It should make no difference whatsoever. Good on your teacher. Try what I do and spend every couple of days hanging back at school. You feel a bit robbed at first but it helps so much on the harder topics.
samanthadude 0
I agree with Cinn. You're not going to have the same math teacher throughout all your years of school anyway; so even if your current math teacher did pass you specifically because he was dating your mother, he isn't going to be able to pass you every other year. Which means you need to learn the material or you'll most likely fail your next math class too; unless your mom plans on dating all of your future math teachers. (Might I suggest she moves to a different subject since math isn't working for you?) :P
TheNewGuy03 29
finally -- a person who is smart, and realizes that grades are not, in fact, candy. op -- earn your shit, dude. if you're expecting to be handed a passing grade now, wait until later -- you won't know what hit you! unless your mother has a penchant for dating math[s] teachers...but considering what already happened, you'll still fail. you getting a free grade is also unfair to other students who, well, try to pass on their own accord. |the kid|
flighted 1
OP is probably still failing so the teacher can have an excuse to have parent-teacher meetings.....hmmmmm
jpeezy122808 0
tell her to give it up better or more often. XD time to practice go buy her a cucumber
franniedottp 8
lmao :P
MaCOOLiT 5
first hand experience? LMAO
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
6 where did that peace love and chicken grease thing come from? just wondering.
riseofabreakings 0
dude I live in Texas! and where did the peace love and chicken grease come from?
sean0206 5
well I'd love to talk more:) know you're not looking for anything but you're really cute:) if you want to talk then let me know;)
minniemouse61 0
^^Wow .. Gettin a guuurl on FML That's a good sign (;
minniemouse61 0
^^Wow .. Gettin a guuurl on FML That's a good sign (;
jdawg4545 0
u must just suck at life to even be failing math
molil_4810 0
this reminds me of parenthood!
schnitzel5 0
well looks like you need a grammars teacher too
cwl727 33
No, in England they say maths.
Schizomaniac 24
Who ******* cares?! Not me, that's for goddamned sure. Now excuse me while I return to wanking myself off while I watch My Little Pony reruns. WERD.
lickmyjock 0
yeah I was going to say this...
illmatic2 16
Maybe not. Some people are really bad in just one subject.
Schizomaniac 24
Ill, I was exploiting the OP's typo.
suppressed08 2
Some are only good in one subject aswell (like me). Or they could be bad at everything.
yazmi_09 3
I was gonna say the same thing
Schizomaniac 24
WAY TO READ CINN'S COMMENT, AIDEN. I was mistaken.
i_am_alice 4
What is this typo?
Schizomaniac 24
There isn't one, you're late. You lose.
Gingerbeard_man 2
Pretty sure that that's regular English, you guys just use the modified "lazy" English
Cinn_fml 23
Or, Gingerbeard, maybe they're now both dialects of English and people can use whichever they want to use? :P
Swimmer248 0
I agree with Cinn.
picturerazzi 0
hahaha!!! I was thinking this as well.
macs4evr 7
It's not a typo dipshit, in the UK it's actually called maths, you're probably failing social studies
xhisors 0
if you do your homework you wouldnt fail - also if you dont understand somethin its pretty easy to ask for help - ydi
beatleschick1940 9
maybe your math teacher is just fair...
pirate5152 0
ur maths teacher? dnt u mean math teacher?
Cinn_fml 23
The OP is from the UK, it's maths not math here.
ParadoxTheory 3
Hmm, since the subject is actually called mathematics, I'd say that maths was closer to being right. Plus, that's how we say it in England.