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mariepastyglue

Offline (the 08/22/2014 at 11:42pm) | Search for a member

mariepastyglue

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 23 October 1985 (28 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1437
  • Number of comments : 80
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About mariepastyglue : FML is so freaken addicting, and I love it!!!!

mariepastyglue's page activity

Visits<b>Qele</b> - 10 hours ago<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 10:13am<b>snowboardflips</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 9:47pm<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 9:38am<b>Erto</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 8:37am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 3:26pm<b>123914</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 10:39pm<b>baseballbv</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 4:52pm<b>papashaan</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 3:13pm<b>Mons</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 1:04am<b>dafuck_15</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 3:51pm<b>FMLMaximus</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 12:41am<b>ayungballer</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 2:04am<b>nyancait</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 3:29pm<b>djoudjou7598</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 6:45am<b>gary3768</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 11:45am<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 10:42am<b>vegemute</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 9:07am

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You have thumbed 5000 comments.

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You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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mariepastyglue's favorite FMLs

Today, my family and I were visiting an aunt. While helping my aunt to set the table, my sister remarked that from behind I look exactly like her. I reflexively blurted out "well fuck you too". Very awkward silence. FML

#20557009
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11901) - you deserved it (36866)

On 03/23/2013 at 8:38pm - misc - by Kjer (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML

#20537010
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20470) - you deserved it (59842)

On 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by je_regrette_tout (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I discovered my son, who has recently moved out of our home, eating his dog's food. His excuse? He wanted the new Pokemon game, and "compromises had to be made". FML

#20122132
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20620) - you deserved it (2638)

On 10/18/2012 at 4:33am - kids - by anon - Australia

Today, I was on a plane returning to University, and I decided to shut my eyes. I opened them about 45 minutes later just as the plane landed to find I couldn't move at all. I was in sleep paralysis. The air hostesses had to lift me out of my seat. FML

#20090890
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25289) - you deserved it (1827)

On 09/27/2012 at 11:46am - health - by Dave (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

#20068526
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44474) - you deserved it (3885)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I foolishly told my husband that I know he's been holding back sexually, and that I was willing to indulge any sexual fantasies he may have. Now it seems that tonight, I'll be responding to the name "Fluttershy". FML

#19846265
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26034) - you deserved it (15679)

On 06/25/2012 at 6:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I asked my girlfriend why she never lets me in her house. She stared blankly and said, "What is inside is not for thine eyes." I told her best friend about this creepiness later on. She sighed and said, "T'was not for mine eyes either. I didst fail to listen." I feel like I'm losing my mind here. FML

#19772012
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24513) - you deserved it (3300)

On 06/11/2012 at 5:45pm - love - by amidreaming?? (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I went to the water park with my boyfriend. A swimsuit was required to go on the rides. My bikini straps somehow got torn off and I had nothing else with me. My boyfriend said, "Hell, just wear my spare shorts. You could pass as a guy with your chest". FML

#19642292
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27742) - you deserved it (2954)

On 05/18/2012 at 3:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, a therapist told me that I was too depressed to attend his depression group meetings. FML

#19520944
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27873) - you deserved it (2503)

On 04/24/2012 at 7:22am - health - by Sad Sally (woman) - United States

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

#19463606
582 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13067) - you deserved it (54045) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, I'm recovering from colon surgery. They gave me codeine as pain relief, which has made me constipated. I'm currently sat on the toilet, trying to push out what feels like a small child wrapped in barbed wire out without busting my stitches. FML

#19405476
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28820) - you deserved it (1695)

On 04/04/2012 at 6:13am - health - by screaming monkey - United Kingdom (Windsor and Maidenhead)

Today, I had to use antiperspirant deodorant under my breasts. FML

#19152897
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24753) - you deserved it (6190)

On 02/24/2012 at 10:05am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland

Today, I found out that my favorite song since I was a small child is actually about anal sex and delaying an orgasm. FML

#19117009
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29200) - you deserved it (4625)

On 02/19/2012 at 6:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymoosey - Canada

Today, I let my little sister sleep in my room because she had a nightmare. She is currently snoring like an overweight 40 year old man with a cold. FML

#19105693
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21531) - you deserved it (2980)

On 02/18/2012 at 5:07am - misc - by sleepless - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML

#18954927
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30821) - you deserved it (4965)

On 01/30/2012 at 7:25pm - intimacy - by ugh (man) - United States



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