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About chuka81 : Well, first, I'm a Nigerian and, no, I'm not a prince. Currently studying law, would hopefully graduate soon. My parents don't know I'm an atheist or they'd probably have my head. I'm a big fan of country music and some very obscure bands such as The Weepies and Drew Holcomb and the neighbors. I'd probably add a lot of my local music acts but none of you would know what the hell I'm talking about.
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Who’s the fairest of them all?
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The Thumb strikes back
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Today, my girlfriend lost one of her rings. I found this out as I overheard her gushing to her friend about how I must have borrowed it to find out what her ring size is. I have zero interest whatsoever in the sick and utterly immoral institution of marriage. FML
Today, after dating my girlfriend for a while, I had a realization. She often says things like, "You're my favorite!" and scratches my beard, which I appreciated affectionately. Upon meeting her pets, it dawned on me that I am just another one of her cats. FML
Today, I visited my boyfriend's uncle's house for a party. His 8 year old cousin started asking if I like penis, so my reaction was to laugh, spitting my drink on her and her new dress. She can't pronounce peanuts, and I can't visit anymore. FML
Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML
Today, it was raining heavily. I saw a large puddle by the edge of the road near with a passing lady. Thinking it would be funny to splash her, I swerved to hit the puddle. The puddle was deeper than I thought. I lost control of the car, spun out, and hit two parked cars. FML
Friday 5 February 2016