barlos88

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Offline (19 hours ago)

barlos88

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : San Diego, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 March 1988 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 641
  • Number of comments : 103
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About barlos88 : Bartender, workout enthusiast, mellow Kauaian

barlos88's page activity

Visits<b>Iluvdonuts</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 4:07pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 3:31pm<b>ALPHA8WOLF</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 2:27am<b>fatgummybear</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 1:30pm<b>VGBadgerz</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 12:12am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 7:55am<b>Love_L0ST</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 1:00am<b>taterrtots</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 2:48pm<b>Craven1987</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 3:11am<b>edmunson</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 1:46am<b>MissEris</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 10:26pm<b>panromantic</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 10:51pm<b>Tendou</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 3:54am<b>cheeeksss</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 7:13pm<b>steeler088</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 9:43pm<b>beeyouteefull</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 8:30pm<b>InnocenceBlue</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 6:49am<b>Greatsoulme</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 6:38am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 1:54pm<b>taterrtots</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 8:46pm<b>jessie85678</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 12:24pm

barlos88's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of barlos88's badges

barlos88's favorite FMLs

Today, I shared with my doctor that I still feel uncomfortable with my medication. She expressed surprise, saying, "Really? By now I would've thought it'd be routine." Sorry, no. In three months, I have not gotten used to sticking a syringe up my butt and injecting my rectum full of medicated foam. FML

by Anonymous / 02/04/2016 at 9:22pm / United States (Maryland) / Health

Today, I was putting the cat outside. He wouldn't go, so I kicked him. Then I woke up to my husband screaming. I’d been dreaming, and the "cat" I kicked was his family jewels. FML

by Anonymous / 08/21/2015 at 4:33am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my daughter to the zoo, because she loves tigers. Correction: she used to love tigers, until one sprayed urine on her from a distance of four meters. FML

by Anonymous / 08/21/2015 at 1:55am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, after getting home from being in the field for a week, my wife who's a nurse, convinced me I had a spider bite on my penis. After rushing to the ER and standing nude in a cold exam room while the ER staff checked me out, I learned it's just an ingrown hair. FML

by Why's it so cold in here? / 02/01/2015 at 1:13pm / United States / Health

Today, I called my mom to ask for some help with my dishwasher. Somehow, the call got turned into a video call. I was wearing a bathrobe, and she was naked in her bathroom. Most awkward call ever. FML

by FaceTime issues / 04/06/2014 at 2:57am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got home from work a little late due to bad traffic. My wife kissed me, then flew into a rage and swore that I had the taste of penis on my lips, accusing me of cheating on her with a guy. Apparently she got this insane "test your man" idea from some Cosmo-type magazine. FML

by Anonymous / 08/30/2013 at 12:14pm / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

by anonymous / 07/17/2013 at 12:48am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, while using a urinal in a very busy mall bathroom, another man unzipped his pants and attempted to use the same one as me. FML

by not cool / 06/28/2013 at 1:16am / Australia (Queensland) / Health

Today, I had to explain to my white girlfriend that dating me doesn't give her the right to call my mother the n-word. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2013 at 11:30pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog did something I had no idea he could do. He participated in an all-male three-way at the dog park. In front of everyone. FML

by MoreActionThanMe / 12/10/2012 at 7:04pm / United States / Animals

Today, I was enjoying a nice bath, when one of my cats jumped up on the rim and started purring. I thought it was sweet, until my other cat ran in and body-slammed the first into the tub with me. Being a conscientious cat owner, I hadn't de-clawed them. FML

by Neutered / 11/27/2012 at 2:52pm / United States (Alaska) / Animals

Today, a co-worker asked me if I have a Facebook account, and I said I do. I had to politely smile as he spent the next half hour insulting me for supposedly being glued to it 24/7, before claiming that it's all a CIA front to steal people's social security details. Why are nutjobs like this even alive? FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2012 at 7:49pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, my girlfriend dared me to put on her bra and panties and give her a lap dance. Feeling spontaneous, I decided to do it. Just as I was getting really into it, she told me I was on webcam for all her friends. Apparently it was a contest of who had their boyfriend the most whipped. She won. FML

by Embarassed / 11/23/2012 at 1:14am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, whilst in an argument with my girlfriend, I told her she was the craziest bitch I'd ever met. She responded with "Challenge accepted." I'm now terrified. FML

by Andrew / 10/30/2012 at 2:08am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, my boyfriend was showing me photos on his iPod when he came across a photo of a half-naked girl. He tried to play it off by quickly changing it, only to reveal even more half-naked girls. FML

by hatemyluck / 09/09/2012 at 10:12pm / United States (New York) / Love