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Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, while shopping at Wal-Mart, a guy grabbed my butt. When I turned around to slap him, he shook his head, said "Nice ass but such an ugly face", then walked away. I've never been told I'm ugly before. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25905) - you deserved it (5819)
On 12/31/2011 at 7:51pm - misc - by thathurt (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I left work early, and discovered I was locked out of my house. I subsequently had to use a spoon I found on the ground to smash the bathroom window. I cut my leg on the glass when I climbed through. While inspecting the wound, I felt a lump in my pocket. It was my house key. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7699) - you deserved it (26936)
On 12/29/2011 at 10:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - China
Today, I found out my girlfriend starts fights with me over text because apparently, when I'm arguing with someone, I stop speaking in "annoying shorthand" and am grammatically correct. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7253) - you deserved it (24033)
On 12/29/2011 at 5:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I got punched in the face by a drunk because I couldn't give him any cigarettes. I don't smoke. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20355) - you deserved it (1624)
Today, we found out where our daughter had been hiding her crayons. We also found out why our stereo stopped working. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16337) - you deserved it (1898)
On 12/26/2011 at 9:24pm - kids - by Peter - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I invited a few of my co-workers over to play video games. Within an hour, my wife had gotten drunk, grabbed my controller, told me to "get back in the kitchen", and described to everyone in blood-chilling detail how she took her first boyfriend's virginity. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21840) - you deserved it (2434)
On 12/23/2011 at 7:26pm - misc - by ThinZ (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, thanks to some asshole with a padlock, I got trapped in porta potty for over an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24857) - you deserved it (1739)
On 12/19/2011 at 12:48pm - misc - by stinkyhair (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was working on the computer when my dad walks in, pointing his finger at me like a gun. Before I could even ask, it turns out he was aiming a rubber band at me. The doctor says I'll be able to take off my eye patch in a couple of days. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23646) - you deserved it (1636)
On 12/19/2011 at 12:03am - health - by suhleedah18 - United States
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via the medium of free-style rapping. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25476) - you deserved it (3171)
On 12/17/2011 at 12:03pm - love - by Emily - United States (Indiana)
Today, I discovered that for the last six months my mother has been leaving my TV on FOX while I sleep, in the hope that my subconscious will absorb it and turn me into "a morally-upright human being". FML
I agree, your life sucks (21853) - you deserved it (3374)
On 12/16/2011 at 5:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, a stoplight dropped square into the bed of my pickup truck. The police think I was attempting to steal it, and my insurance won't cover the damage to my truck. There were no witnesses. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23891) - you deserved it (1377)
On 12/15/2011 at 10:16pm - misc - by metallicatime - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend took me to dinner and near the end, he pulled out a long, rectangular box. Thinking it was a necklace, I got very excited. It was a wand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20598) - you deserved it (12261)
On 12/13/2011 at 7:26am - love - by reallyman__639 - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, I was set up on a blind date. When I arrived, the person waiting for me was a woman. It appears that my friends have always thought I was a lesbian, and that they 'played along' when I talked about guys. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26416) - you deserved it (2402)
On 12/09/2011 at 2:56am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I got to say, "My best friend hooked up with my step-sister's grandma's aunt" and be correct. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20485) - you deserved it (1630)
On 12/09/2011 at 12:22am - love - by thatisnotcool45 - Canada
Today, I walked out of the store, car keys in hand, only to discover my car was missing. After a frantic search, I started to hyperventilate and a nearly had a full-blown panic attack. Then I remembered I walked to the store. I am an idiot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18587) - you deserved it (25104)
Friday 24 May 2013
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