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Today, I went on a date with an awesome guy. I got super hammered and punched him in the face. FML

#5894935 (95)

I agree, your life sucks (4338) - you totally deserved it (35012)

On 10/19/2009 at 11:42am - love - by DrunkGirl - Sent from a mobile version

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kierstin's life also sucks

stick also deserved it

Comments

Man, I would love a super hammer-hand to punch my dates with.

#1 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:20pm by Narzhul

Haha hammerhand, I want to marry a girl with one of those.

#19 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:52pm by tyhillman

Isn't there an FML out there in the perspective of the boyfriend?

#52 - On 10/19/2009 at 7:33pm by Reyo

http://www.fmylife.com/love/5758524

North Carolina and France, so not the same couple

#54 - On 10/19/2009 at 7:49pm by NewEngland

Wooo, a feisty one. A great candidate that I would like to give some donkey punches to while Banging her from behind! Ahh haaaa haaa!

#70 - On 10/19/2009 at 11:49pm by Skull_300

Terrible FML. You're a fucking moron.

#2 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:22pm by Rota

For some fellows that would make you a prime candidate for a second date.

#3 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:22pm by macnamera

If you actually read the FML in moderation it did say the "dude wants a second date because he likes that I'm crazy"

#7 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:29pm by nomadxx7

Randel Graves says "Seventeen year olds nowadays are crazy. They're up for anything. They even like it when you go ass to mouth."

#11 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:40pm by jackkerouc9

They change the FMLs during moderation? Da fuck?

#12 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:41pm by Gavik

Actually I think that most people post their FMLs about 3 - 5 times each. I've seen duplicates but also the same FML written several different ways. I think it's to try to get the story published so the OP is making multiple versions to get one to be submitted.

#31 - On 10/19/2009 at 3:33pm by nomadxx7

this one makes me sad somehow... FML has lost it's glory

#4 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:23pm by Zakimus

Your doing it wrong. He is supposed to punch you in the back of the head.

#5 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:25pm by jackkerouc9

Foreplay?

#6 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:28pm by mercyFML

Longtime.

#25 - On 10/19/2009 at 3:07pm by TheLetterZero

If you had an awesome date.. then why did you need to get super hammered? its your own fault so no i dont feel sorry for you.... just for him

#8 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:36pm by phanotomsea

No sympathy. YDI.

#9 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:38pm by The_Disturbed

Funny shit, but get to a meeting fast!

#10 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:39pm by BlacknBlueHaHa

YDI for being an idiot and getting wasted on a date.

#13 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:41pm by Chunchunchun

I like how France resumes to Nord Pas de Calais

#14 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:45pm by Boulouloum

well don't feel bad I am sure that there are guys who are into that sort of thing.

#15 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:47pm by nofxtime

Why would you even try to get sympathy for this?
Unless he was sneaking alcohol into your drinks, you deserved that one hundred percent.

#16 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:48pm by dreamfactory

you know, the truth comes out when you're drunk..

sounds like you didn't even like him =)

#17 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:50pm by fuckingshitt343

AWESOME!!!!!!!

#18 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:50pm by ShutUpandEat

Guys don't mind if you get hammered if you also get nailed.

#20 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:58pm by perdix

NICE!

#81 - On 10/20/2009 at 5:12pm by donkey_hang_down

Oooohhh, this guy would call it FOREPLAY!

#21 - On 10/19/2009 at 2:58pm by Brakeshoe

HAHAHAHAHA AWESOME ! :D

#23 - On 10/19/2009 at 3:04pm by Chaldean710

i kissed a dunk giiiirl. why do i, do these things i do to myseelf.

#24 - On 10/19/2009 at 3:06pm by best_friends_

i fucking love you. and i fucking love soco.

#44 - On 10/19/2009 at 5:29pm by asafetybuzz

That's what he gets for dating a girl who overdrinks.

#26 - On 10/19/2009 at 3:10pm by TheLetterZero

I just wanna know how you say 'super hammered' in French. I'm sure it sounds sexy!

#27 - On 10/19/2009 at 3:14pm by kukopia

"complètement bourrée" would be a possibility...

#80 - On 10/20/2009 at 4:46pm by memory_loss

French is not sexy. I speak French... It's not sexy at all.

Neither is Spanish.

#93 - On 12/28/2009 at 9:36am by ahriman22

I hate drunk chicks

#28 - On 10/19/2009 at 3:16pm by citycrazed25

this seriously just happened to me last week. but I was the guy that got hit. I wonder if this is her?

#29 - On 10/19/2009 at 3:23pm by drmike

I'd be okay with this.

#30 - On 10/19/2009 at 3:29pm by netfreak

HAHAHA!! Thank you for bringing this into my life!! So funny!

#32 - On 10/19/2009 at 3:36pm by Shelley9912

Hope he punched you back. Fair's fair if you punched him first. Maybe it'll teach you not to get 'super-hammered' and punch him in the face.

#33 - On 10/19/2009 at 3:49pm by freudianego

He should have punched you back, or at least (jack)hammered you

#34 - On 10/19/2009 at 3:50pm by donkey_hang_down

You should have offered him anal to make up for it.

#35 - On 10/19/2009 at 4:05pm by SheriffBart

If I was on a first date with a girl who not only got hammered but full on hit me in the face, she would have my applause and would automatically qualify for a second date. In fact, that would bump her up 80% of the way to "worthy to bear my children"

#36 - On 10/19/2009 at 4:20pm by thousandinone

would you like to go out with me??? : )

#68 - On 10/19/2009 at 11:23pm by hardskrew

YDI you stupid drunk.

#37 - On 10/19/2009 at 4:29pm by ayashe

Your own damn fault.

#38 - On 10/19/2009 at 4:29pm by Rasetsu

So because you don't know your limits, you want sympathy? Go to rehab.

#39 - On 10/19/2009 at 4:54pm by AndreaHatesYou1

if it helps, i got black out drunk and punched my boyfriend in the throat on our first date. i was aiming for the face, but he dodged it. we've been together for over a year.

#40 - On 10/19/2009 at 4:58pm by lynnshelbs

awesome lol

#41 - On 10/19/2009 at 5:01pm by KiddNYC10

EDIT: oops wrong one....

#42 - On 10/19/2009 at 5:02pm by A7X112009

gees! so not funny like whos house did ya wind up at afterwards? not smart to get hammered on the first date!

#43 - On 10/19/2009 at 5:02pm by baby_gurl2405

YDI for getting that drunk.
Self control is not that hard.

#45 - On 10/19/2009 at 5:33pm by _Naboo_

Bitch gets hammered, bitch's bitch gets hammered. In the face.

#46 - On 10/19/2009 at 5:34pm by Clitastrophe

Unless it's a glitch in the system and all of France turns into Nord-Pas-de-Calais, there is an awful lot from that area, and someone obviously has a lot of time on their hands to conjure up these ridiculous scenarios.

#47 - On 10/19/2009 at 5:46pm by dilhole

Four million people also live there.

#60 - On 10/19/2009 at 9:15pm by redbluegreen

my god you are my idol

#48 - On 10/19/2009 at 6:02pm by peaceheyyy19

Sounds like someone's getting a second date.

#49 - On 10/19/2009 at 6:16pm by dspadres

sounds like your gonna be my second wife

#50 - On 10/19/2009 at 6:30pm by KillU2009

wasnt there an fml a couple weeks ago about a guy getting punched in the face by a girl he went out with that got too drunk?

i think there was.

#51 - On 10/19/2009 at 7:23pm by whoslayedgoliath

win!

#53 - On 10/19/2009 at 7:37pm by Superawesomestev

if he was so "awesome", why did you feel the need to get hammered?

#55 - On 10/19/2009 at 8:00pm by g00nie

sounds like hes the one that got hammered..

#57 - On 10/19/2009 at 8:44pm by blake116

You have an alcohol problem! You may want to do something about it.

#58 - On 10/19/2009 at 8:44pm by yourkiddingright

That's hot.

#59 - On 10/19/2009 at 9:01pm by RPGod

Wait a second.... a guy posted how he went on a date with a hot chick. That she got drunk. And punched him in the face... HOW RANDOM!

#61 - On 10/19/2009 at 9:36pm by Jessica12

So you punch him in the face and it is fuck YOUR life? lol, YDI and FHL

#63 - On 10/19/2009 at 10:44pm by GreenHacker

Hey #30 correction: thats wat he gets for waking up i vagas!

#64 - On 10/19/2009 at 10:45pm by LeoV

I laughed, I really did.
I shouldn't have...
But I did.

FHL, not yours

#65 - On 10/19/2009 at 10:53pm by DameGreyWulf

ahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*wipes tear from eye* whew.

#66 - On 10/19/2009 at 11:13pm by Vaetrus

I've done it, too. It happens to the best of us rowdy gals.

#67 - On 10/19/2009 at 11:20pm by hardskrew

Wow. Great first impression. you're definitely a keeper. Guys, she is available now.

#69 - On 10/19/2009 at 11:34pm by vmimo

Any particular reason why the part about him liking your craziness was left out? I know I saw that when I was moderating submissions....

#72 - On 10/20/2009 at 12:52am by kscott88

DONKEY PUNCH!!!

#73 - On 10/20/2009 at 2:32am by asilex

Might I suggest dating a masochist next time?

#74 - On 10/20/2009 at 3:34am by Ninjaface

why are there so many FML's from Nord-Pas-de-Calais? Must be the same person making them up.

#75 - On 10/20/2009 at 4:03am by nzl

yeah coz there cant be more than one person in Nord-Pas-de-Calais who reads FML, thats impossible

#76 - On 10/20/2009 at 7:19am by NATTiCUS

fml was made by 3 french dudes...

#77 - On 10/20/2009 at 10:36am by stephy_k22

I don't like to think of myself as a nasty person but really, I cannot summon any pity for people who get sick or do stupid things because they got drunk... Your life wouldn't suck if you didn't drink!!

#78 - On 10/20/2009 at 3:23pm by Im_Not_Jimmy

hahaha, that is SO funny!! Man that sucks, he must have been like WTF !? god this made my day.

#79 - On 10/20/2009 at 3:40pm by Rockybaby12

Aw that takes me back! Sounds like me and my man every other weekend ahahaha.

#82 - On 10/20/2009 at 5:41pm by belladonna_1986

Haha, "hammered," "punched." I get it xD It's a pun

#83 - On 10/21/2009 at 1:35am by theunwantedone

I went on a date with a girl. Turns out she's a hammer and punched me in the face. FML

#84 - On 10/21/2009 at 9:42pm by begeru

nyc...thats how u roll!

#85 - On 10/22/2009 at 10:25am by sj

This happened to me once. One of the many reasons I decided to quit drinking.

#86 - On 10/26/2009 at 8:30am by roisindubh

dont drink then

#88 - On 11/03/2009 at 11:42am by amybroccoli

If I was him, I would have donkey punched you later!

And you would like it...

#89 - On 11/03/2009 at 11:56am by donkey_hang_down

I can't believe that we allow women to drink now, much less leave the house. These are the kind of people that we let vote. F our lives.

#90 - On 11/27/2009 at 7:34pm by ElvenMarth

not ok #90... not ok. you are a sexist jackass.

girls rule XD (yes im a guy)

#95 - On 03/19/2010 at 12:52am by immabe13

the moral of this story is don't get "super hammered" because you'll probably end up doing something incredibly stupid.

#91 - On 11/28/2009 at 9:27pm by midnight10

Good. That's what you get for being a worthless alcoholic. And this is a waste of server space.

#92 - On 12/01/2009 at 11:50pm by metalpunk

I honestly don't remember when going out drinking was a good idea for a date. You're supposed to get to know each other better. That's the point of dating. Drinking is for going out as friends or when already together.

#94 - On 02/17/2010 at 5:39pm by Compass

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