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Today, my boyfriend decided to name his penis "Jesus". For the last two hours he's been continuously asking if I "want to be touched by Jesus" or will I "let Jesus in to spread his warmth." FML

#8119072 (290)

I agree, your life sucks (8609) - you totally deserved it (2411)

On 02/11/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by syl - Canada (Alberta)

More FMLs?

suuuucks's life also sucks

BlackPolarbear also deserved it

Comments

(+2)

... he seems cool o_O

#1 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:14am by elodea

(-1)

lol not reali it's jus funny not cool

#6 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:15am by tatte3

(+2)

sounds like a man after my own heart

#15 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:22am by saltz

(+1)

haha he's genius

#43 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:52am by me199

(+1)

what does it mean when people say. ^This

#44 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:52am by responses

(+1)

means he's doing exactly what we would

#49 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:00am by saltz

(+1)

haha that's fucking brilliant, I'm naming my dick after someone in the bible sooo many little metaphors.

#85 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:17am by poopberry

(+1)

#85 name it Peter since you keep being denied by women :D

#90 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:23am by purplemnm

(+1)

are you a Jesus freak?

#106 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:12am by rochound

(+1)

FYL

#125 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:56am by ilovefatcats

(+2)

@purplemnm: Oh, snap! But seriously, that was brilliant. He'll be on SNL one day.

#140 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:49am by Zigma

(+2)

so....... did u accept Jesus into your life LMAO

#174 - On 02/11/2010 at 2:48pm by russwee

(+2)

Jesus loves all.....including guys.

#187 - On 02/11/2010 at 4:20pm by pfunk129

(+2)

hahahahahahahahaahahshahahaahah

#190 - On 02/11/2010 at 4:54pm by j0k32r0x

(+1)

that's just funny

#196 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:00pm by soccer060

This comment has been moderated.

#200 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:49pm by sc95060sc

(+1)

rotflmfao!!! I like this guy :D

#211 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:50pm by vrock

(+1)

You just need to let Jesus inside you.

#212 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:41pm by Pointy130

(+2)

I want to be touched by Jesus lmao Jk

#227 - On 02/12/2010 at 2:53am by herrera_2014

(+1)

haha your bfs awesome love him haha

#229 - On 02/12/2010 at 4:47am by rebornhunter25

(+1)

Hahaha I actually thinks that's hilarious!!!

#230 - On 02/12/2010 at 5:03am by khloe_sophia

(+1)

106 u are my hero

#240 - On 02/12/2010 at 6:07pm by hoopstar15

(+1)

haha!(: that's the shizz!! that's laughable. his penis is a hero!!:D

#244 - On 02/13/2010 at 5:24pm by Spoozie

(+1)

@106 no I'm not I just spent the last three years of school at a Christian high school...I know the bible like the back of my hand

#254 - On 02/16/2010 at 10:01pm by purplemnm

(0)

it's brilliant but I can see how it would be annoying

#274 - On 04/11/2010 at 5:16pm by granthm

(0)

lol #90!

#279 - On 05/04/2010 at 5:31pm by thatonek1d

(0)

haha ur boyfriend is awesome op

#281 - On 05/18/2010 at 1:48am by WorldCupCheer

(+1)

haha perdixxx

least he didn't go with "almighty lord" or have fun with dick and Jane

#54 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:10am by scuba1722

(+1)

ROFLMFAO @ 54

#138 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:40am by Tripout

This comment has been moderated.

#202 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:06pm by tj41567

(+1)

You were probably like "I want to be touched by Jesus and let him into my 'heart"

#257 - On 02/17/2010 at 10:37pm by Gumblebum100

(+1)

hahaha that sounds like something my bf would say as a joke lol.. I hope u took it lightly and mucked around with him bak lol

#3 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:14am by quelbaby

(+1)

If his junk can't do any miracles exorcise him!

#9 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:15am by Eddie_Paints

(0)

I like your samurai champloo pic <3

#68 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:37am by XDNurse

(0)

quelbaby ur from p.a arnt you

#82 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:09am by isaiah614

(0)

Thanks Xdnurse! That's so cool you know where itz from!!

#167 - On 02/11/2010 at 1:39pm by Eddie_Paints

(0)

yesh I'm an anime junkie...;3

#177 - On 02/11/2010 at 3:03pm by XDNurse

(0)

lmfao. do it just as a joke I dare you

#4 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:14am by Terwilliger

(0)

guess what you think about every Sunday at church xD

#241 - On 02/13/2010 at 12:33am by OBCD

(0)

hes funny lol

#5 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:14am by px

(0)

haha hell yeah he sounds like a badass

#122 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:50am by hunter989

(0)

FYL naaawwss I would hate that, I would be like shut tfu it's a penis not Jesus, aw.

#7 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:15am by jaydnnx

(0)

oo but when it goes in ull be shouting the lords name in vain there's no denyin it

#111 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:24am by scuba1722

(+1)

don't fuck with Jesus!

#170 - On 02/11/2010 at 2:20pm by greenlime

(+1)

hahah. "fuck with Jesus"... I get it :D

#208 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:17pm by quietlytearful

(0)

LMFAO all of the above.

#210 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:42pm by HeyThereGorgeous

(0)

omg thtss hilarious..:D lol

#8 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:15am by Foxracingluver

(+1)

Nice. Methinks your boyfriend is a little weird. That would be so disturbing...

#10 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:16am by snickerdoodles

(0)

don't knock it till you try Jesus ;-)

#60 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:24am by lickmyjock

(0)

You changed your pic again?

#78 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:59am by x_HELLo_tHERE_x

(0)

Methinks??? That was so act cute.

#95 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:39am by heeheehoo

(0)

Shakespeare?

Juliet said that in one part.

#152 - On 02/11/2010 at 12:02pm by Ajjas013

(0)

....

#195 - On 02/11/2010 at 5:45pm by conner516

(0)

ask him if his Jesus would like the same fate as the real one ?

#11 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:16am by Leveilleur

(-2)

that is lacking wit. I can totally come up with something better than" Jesus spreading his warmth". your boyfriends a retard

#12 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:16am by warom

(0)

do it here.

#42 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:46am by maskedman

(0)

haha give your boyfriend my number bahaha! that's funny as f*ck.

#13 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:18am by sugarbabyxoxo

(0)

I'll call it whatever name that pleases you if it gets your number... and create better inuendos

#56 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:16am by scuba1722

(0)

ew

#71 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:42am by babybubz

(0)

lmao

#77 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:57am by scuba1722

(0)

Okay, let's hear some.

#80 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:01am by x_HELLo_tHERE_x

(-1)

If I call it any pokemon i want...
I choose you ________.
what!?!??________ is evolving??
_____ use ur hydropump, quick attack, stringshot... ect...

the terminator

pops cherry... I'll be back
done fucking.... hasta la vista baby... kick her out

I'll call it moby dick if it catches me that whale

few examples I have tons more lmao

#91 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:25am by scuba1722

(0)

Jesus was way better

#127 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:57am by LTMcleod

(0)

Yeah, Jesus was partially funny anyway.

#134 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:30am by pendatic

(0)

Me thinks you're not getting that number...

#143 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:53am by DGross

(0)

#156 - On 02/11/2010 at 12:39pm by babybubz

(0)

Jesus wants to stay the night.

#159 - On 02/11/2010 at 12:43pm by Ajjas013

(0)

since when does jesus live in pantss?

#166 - On 02/11/2010 at 1:38pm by deathcab7

^^your hott! ;)

#235 - On 02/12/2010 at 11:14am by Foreverfacedown

(0)

get a life!! ^

really guys? y'all go on fml to hit on girls? lmao

#251 - On 02/15/2010 at 2:35pm by seeimdee

(0)

let him in!! ahah your bf is so funny i need one like him :D

#14 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:22am by Astraea

(0)

If you go to anyone from the church they'll tell you to let Jesus in..

#171 - On 02/11/2010 at 2:25pm by greenlime

(0)

yeah, cause this is totally a fml? not really..you must e a sensitive bitch.

#16 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:22am by FatMooseEars

(0)

^This.

#19 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:24am by snickerdoodles

(0)

it sacrificed so much for your sins and will rise again hardened with those crimes and fuck you on judgement day

#58 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:20am by scuba1722

(0)

Well done scuba. I salute you! 

#81 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:04am by x_HELLo_tHERE_x

(0)

*thinks*
......ow.

#113 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:26am by cinnaluna

(0)

there we go, that was good

#129 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:59am by LTMcleod

(0)

jesus will enlighten you hahahaha

#18 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:24am by tuscany

(0)

Crucify Jesus

#20 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:28am by Playout

(0)

your bf has a sense of humor. you don't. so really, fuck his life.

#21 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:29am by you_guys_are_dum

(0)

that's soo funny!! LOL but not a FML!!

#22 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:30am by zuuzuu

(0)

hahahahahaha EPIC WIN

#24 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:31am by KASHMIR

(0)

lol sounds like he is loosing ways to get into your pants but coming up with great lines

#25 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:31am by Nikolee

(0)

so question to people on here. girls:what would you name your penis if you had one?! guys: what do you call yours if you do have a nickname for it????

#26 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:31am by lovesexhugs

(0)

Squirtle!

#27 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:32am by snickerdoodles

(0)

I call mine chuck Norris. no explanation necessary.

#29 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:34am by KASHMIR

(0)

you can name it.

#34 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:39am by FatMooseEars

(0)

mike hawk

#51 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:04am by thump

(0)

mines called harry potter. that's how magical it is

#57 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:16am by HamsteronA

(0)

perdixxx u know u call it scuba steve after my pure awesomness...

and i don't call upon him untill it's a sure thing, so if you really want to know guess what's gotta happen lol

#61 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:24am by scuba1722

(0)

so scuba is into the men I see

#69 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:39am by saltz

(0)

omg #57 you made me remember that fml when the guy told his gf he wanted to "put his basilisk into her chamber of secrets" lmfao! you made my day ;)

#70 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:40am by XDNurse

(0)

I name mine mini me, mini because I've got baby dick, and me to impy awesomeness

#75 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:51am by saltz

(0)

not at all into men what made u jump to that

#79 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:00am by scuba1722

(0)

I call my junk simply "mr"

#97 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:45am by lickmyjock

(0)

Zeus, cos I'm a pagan

#116 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:35am by thoughtcrimeno1

(0)

it definately sounded as if you were proposing sexual favors to perdixxx

#145 - On 02/11/2010 at 11:05am by saltz

(0)

my uncle told me the name for his in high school was "cherry poppin daddy"

:/

#255 - On 02/16/2010 at 10:05pm by purplemnm

(0)

that's a little disturbing

#28 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:33am by nickwk

(0)

lmao I'm pretty sure I'm jealous of how fast you came up with a nickname... I can't think of one.

#30 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:35am by lovesexhugs

(0)

You have a penis?

#92 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:36am by perdix

(0)

and you have an imposter perdix!!!

#119 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:40am by scuba1722

(0)

No, that is his penis posting.





jk

#169 - On 02/11/2010 at 1:53pm by CallMeHush

(0)

I'd name my dick; crayola...
I had a pun but I forgot it. haha

#252 - On 02/15/2010 at 2:38pm by seeimdee

(0)

^ This

#256 - On 02/17/2010 at 9:34am by Bullet4MyChemaMo

(0)

why would i name my penis(if i had one)? could sb please tell me what the point is??

#31 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:35am by Astraea

(0)

chill homie. it's a guy thing. don't reply or youll get roundhouse kicked by "chuck Norris".

#33 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:38am by KASHMIR

(0)

it really is your second personality it must have a name

#63 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:26am by scuba1722

(0)

scuba, mine IS my personality, so I don't have to give it a name ;)

Astraea, the point is called the head. It is particularly sensitive, so if you ever get to play with a penis, focus extra attention on the point. Your brother, I mean, your friend's husband, oops, I mean your dad. . . what's wrong with me?, I mean your boyfriend will appreciate it.

#107 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:12am by perdix

(0)

personification?

#118 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:39am by thoughtcrimeno1

(0)

boys are just stupid that's why. they think naming there dick is funny.

#250 - On 02/15/2010 at 2:33pm by seeimdee

(0)

what a douche

#32 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:36am by mponce12

(0)

the penis doesn't need a name. it's too royally suave for such nonsense. unless it can't match it's purpose. then you just name it "lame dick". :\

#35 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:39am by arikeer

(0)

……Bad past experiences much?

#89 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:20am by fyrestarter00

(0)

lmfao haha

#36 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:41am by bcwrape69

(0)

boo hoo, I think that his enuendo is actually quite funny

#38 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:42am by BMP

(0)

I need a chuck Norris in my life

#39 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:43am by Nikolee

(0)

lmao rename it for him

#41 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:44am by kaydee085

(+2)

Does it take more than 2000 years for Him to come?

#45 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:53am by perdix

(0)

best comment. the end.

#46 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:55am by you_guys_are_dum

(0)

LMAO!!! Good One!

#47 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:57am by MsBigelsworth

(0)

perdix just won the Internet.

#62 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:26am by Wooddaver

(+1)

lmao he came once give him some credit

#67 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:32am by scuba1722

(0)

win

#72 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:42am by saltz

(0)

At least the op couldn't complain about how her bf doesn't last very long

#172 - On 02/11/2010 at 2:34pm by greenlime

(0)

that's so wrong....

#52 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:05am by Shadowdra126

(+2)

I've got an idea. how bout you skip the crucifying part and just burry it in a cave. *wink wink

#55 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:16am by just0wow

(0)

WWJD

#64 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:27am by Adam2092

(0)

lol

#65 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:29am by airforce987

(0)

haha. he's a smart kid

#66 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:31am by japs96

(0)

lmao.!!! he said u wanna get touched by Jesus.? funny shit Mann..funny shit. I'm still laughing

#73 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:44am by CheerRivera

(0)

name ur pussy the virgin Mary

#74 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:47am by sgomfg

(0)

wait you like mother son action?!!!!! you must be from Alabama.

#76 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:53am by saltz

(0)

umm virgin Mary? wouldn't it just be Mary?

#203 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:22pm by LforLove

(0)

wow. that is all I have to say..

#209 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:22pm by quietlytearful

(0)

let jesus heal u

#83 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:11am by uhohuscrewedup

(0)

Before you two try anything, I think you should make "Jesus" heal the sick and walk on water. ;]

#86 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:17am by skepkitty

(0)

I dunno, mine's had some weird names before but Jesus is out there……you should ask him if he wants you to Crucify it

#87 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:18am by fyrestarter00

(0)

that is hilarious!! this fml made my day!!

#88 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:19am by abstar

(0)

He probably calls it Jesus because it takes 3 days to rise from the dead.

#93 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:38am by Darksyde

(0)

After being in a cave, no less.

#109 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:14am by perdix

(0)

haha. mine us called "orange chicken delight." lol

#94 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:38am by akwizzle123

(0)

scuba. dood. ur awsome. and funny as hell

#96 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:41am by xvxblackdahlia

(0)

/bow i'll be here all week

#105 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:10am by scuba1722

lmfao that is funny.

#98 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:52am by heyhookers

(0)

name ur vag satan

#99 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:55am by LOLomgWTF

(+1)

maybe next Jesus will spit on you, then make you kiss his feet, oh I meant balls

#100 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:56am by razorp

(0)

...Win

#101 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:01am by Rickymonkeypants

(0)

it will forgive your sins go for it

#102 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:04am by blackstatic

(0)

I will pray to Jesus so that he will help you with your problem.

HA.

#103 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:06am by Ateaney13

(0)

I can get where he is coming from

#104 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:09am by funkey3

(0)

that's pretty hilarious

#108 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:13am by sublime93

(0)

lame.

#110 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:15am by twistedavalon06

(0)

MAY THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELL YOU!!!

#112 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:25am by thedivinecomeD

(0)

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahHahaha

#205 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:28pm by LforLove

(0)

my girl named my penis Jesus never knew why untill she screamed it out many times in bed (go fig)

#114 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:26am by Wasted_Elmo

(+1)

WAIT!!! I GOT IT!!! tell him his penis is like Jesus... nonexistent. XD

#115 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:27am by thedivinecomeD

(0)

well... you did say yes... right?

#117 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:39am by damienwatkins

(0)

Calls it Jesus because it's dead and decomposed as well?

#120 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:46am by omgwtffmmfl

(0)

lmao, thats funny.. at least he's funny :L?

#121 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:46am by indiecindyx

(0)

no matter how bad your vision is , DO NOT let "Jesus" come anywhere near your eyes. he CANT cure you!!! (hehehe...get it, "come"?)

#123 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:51am by thedivinecomeD

(0)

I think that's hilarious. As long as he doesn't keep doing that for the next week.

#124 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:52am by orlyescence

(0)

I would stop eventually but when I nut in out or around my girl I would always finish with
" you have been cumpelled by jesus"

#128 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:58am by Wasted_Elmo

(0)

i dont know whether that was funny of the OP's boyfriend, or very disrespectful. he's clearly NOT a good catholic lol. FYL for going out with a dumbass.

#126 - On 02/11/2010 at 9:57am by JojoBrown520

(0)

what a tool

#130 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:01am by givants

(0)

lol whatta pimp.

#131 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:09am by freakinflynn

(0)

dump him. he is a dumb ass MF. don't have any respect for his own god. Ahole

#132 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:13am by mrzero

(0)

Who said it's his god mrzero? Bit of an assumption there.

#137 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:35am by pendatic

(0)

yes I love the whole dump someone for saying one thing that irritates you, a true sign of maturity. get over yourself

#146 - On 02/11/2010 at 11:13am by saltz

(0)

I don't get what your complaining about

that's funny

#133 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:21am by drummer07boy

(0)

HILARIOUS!!!!!! I couldn't stop laughing!!!

#135 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:31am by adamsk1

(0)

I get weirded out when guys name their dicks... This is a little disturbing. FYL

#136 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:32am by PhillyFox

(0)

My name says it all. He needs to change "his" name.....I did get a good giggle though lol.

#139 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:48am by Im_Jesus_BITCH

(0)

wow you're a dick

#288 - On 08/30/2010 at 5:32am by Chocolate_Chunk

(0)

your bf sounds like a dork

#141 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:51am by comatoast

(0)

there's a line in a film -- The Exorcist -- "Let Jesus f@@k you!"

#142 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:52am by fastcared

(0)

that's hilarious

#144 - On 02/11/2010 at 11:04am by koko1718

(0)

at least it wasnt like you guys were having sex and he was screaming "may the penis be with you!"

#147 - On 02/11/2010 at 11:22am by merccy319

(0)

I tried that... almost got slapped... next time warn ppl of the consequences

#232 - On 02/12/2010 at 7:30am by scuba1722

(0)

why are you complaining??

#148 - On 02/11/2010 at 11:32am by bsfpolo

(0)

Jesus will smite you!!!

#149 - On 02/11/2010 at 11:49am by yesterday1_2

(0)

lmao haha that's classicc

#150 - On 02/11/2010 at 11:51am by ImTrEvOr

(0)

classic

#151 - On 02/11/2010 at 11:59am by ewrek

(0)

does Jesus wanna get nailed to a cross?

#153 - On 02/11/2010 at 12:13pm by crossel

(0)

i love yout bf. you should name your pussy Mary

#155 - On 02/11/2010 at 12:34pm by FMLoverAgain

(0)

Mary is Jesus's mother weirdo

#272 - On 03/24/2010 at 4:23pm by sexysinglesam

(0)

sounds like a immature prick, joking or not.

#157 - On 02/11/2010 at 12:39pm by bigpapi210

(0)

now that's a brilliant concept. ur bf is smart fellow! how is this a fml? u should be all over Jesus, as he will save you.

#158 - On 02/11/2010 at 12:41pm by adi2

(0)

thats fucking awesome

#160 - On 02/11/2010 at 1:00pm by killurbeer

(0)

Thats hilarious! Hes my dream guy! jkjk hahahaaa

#162 - On 02/11/2010 at 1:17pm by anonymous112295

(0)

haha hilarious

#163 - On 02/11/2010 at 1:20pm by amberceleste

(0)

so... just let jesus spread his blessings all over you

#164 - On 02/11/2010 at 1:26pm by Joey7361

This comment has been moderated.

#165 - On 02/11/2010 at 1:28pm by olw25

(0)

Tell him youre Jewish, kick him in the crotch, then leave. :-)

#168 - On 02/11/2010 at 1:40pm by Laurendorcus

(-1)

that's horrible. I would dump my BF if he just threw Jesus' name around like it was nothing and named his penis that!!! Truly horrible!!!

#173 - On 02/11/2010 at 2:44pm by kristidgranger

(0)

hopefully you nailed his Jesus like the real one?

#175 - On 02/11/2010 at 2:50pm by BStinson

(+1)

when you are done, and he has "completed", does Jesus ever rise from the dead for a second round?

#176 - On 02/11/2010 at 2:53pm by BStinson

This comment has been moderated.

#178 - On 02/11/2010 at 3:11pm by buttafly414

(0)

that is hilarious as hell!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#179 - On 02/11/2010 at 3:20pm by 510lobita510

(0)

A little sacraligious (sp?) but funny as fuck.

Just to mess with him you should've said you're an Atheist and don't believe in Jesus.

#180 - On 02/11/2010 at 3:24pm by dorito_420

(0)

let Jesus spread his warmth!

#181 - On 02/11/2010 at 3:24pm by walkerellis

(0)

aww I wish I had a funny boyfriend :( lol

#182 - On 02/11/2010 at 3:25pm by blackchick

(0)

not really an fml but more of how annoying, your bf is funny

#183 - On 02/11/2010 at 3:27pm by smhallo

(0)

Hahah he sounds really funny

#184 - On 02/11/2010 at 3:34pm by amazinggbaby

(+1)

oh no my boyfriend is a genius with humor. FML

#185 - On 02/11/2010 at 3:53pm by cakezorz

(0)

if my boyfriend did that I'd probably have a 100% reason to believe in Jesus.

#186 - On 02/11/2010 at 3:54pm by tia73

(-2)

flipping stupid, why the he'll would he do
that?! seriously I dnt think it's fun to make fun of Jesus. Grow up already.

#188 - On 02/11/2010 at 4:25pm by l4princess

(0)

maybe you should grow up yourself. May we also not make fun of the easter bunny or santa?

#289 - On 08/30/2010 at 5:34am by Chocolate_Chunk

(0)

That's hilarious, but blasphemous.

Kinda like watching Family Guy... :D

#191 - On 02/11/2010 at 4:58pm by ScaryyMary

(0)

this guy is a pimp

#192 - On 02/11/2010 at 5:11pm by olefan

(0)

lmao he sounds like fun

#193 - On 02/11/2010 at 5:19pm by chikiitaaa

(0)

holy fuck XD this is amazing!!! best fml ever!!!

#194 - On 02/11/2010 at 5:31pm by roseyredcheeks

(-1)

that's sick. break up with that dumbass

#197 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:26pm by pandabear90

(0)

perdix, scuba,

#198 - On 02/11/2010 at 6:41pm by ssdd_dilligaf

(0)

apparently he thinks too much of himself and has alot of spare time!

#199 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:32pm by XxpootieXx

(+2)

I'm typing this with my penis. cool huh?

#201 - On 02/11/2010 at 7:51pm by tperknohomo

(0)

Did you like it?

#204 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:23pm by Lordlucian

(0)

LMFAO!!!!!

#206 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:32pm by KarinaValencia

(0)

Does he know Jesus was crucified?.....may be time to remind him.

#207 - On 02/11/2010 at 8:34pm by epictrollathon

(0)

tell him you're sure Jesus is taller than that.

#213 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:42pm by snafu57

(0)

um...

#214 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:44pm by fairies633

(0)

He is awesome. I think I need Jesus in my life.

#215 - On 02/11/2010 at 10:50pm by tampura

(0)

lol they should definately make a FMD. there's more FMD's than FML's on this site

#216 - On 02/11/2010 at 11:03pm by Diannaa

(0)

#91 is annoying!

#217 - On 02/11/2010 at 11:49pm by 101Alex101

(0)

ohhh woooow. that's just WRONG. lmaoo

#218 - On 02/11/2010 at 11:57pm by ledamonsterbunny

(0)

lmao he so funny. i gotta tell my husband this 1, he will love it and take after it...

#219 - On 02/12/2010 at 12:05am by eli20

(0)

AMAZING!! he should have said Jesus wants to hang with Mary half clam!

#220 - On 02/12/2010 at 12:13am by D4RKM4TT3R

(0)

ATHEISTS RULE!!! lol just kidding you shouldve said that

#221 - On 02/12/2010 at 12:57am by Emofluffinzhehe

(-2)

sinful. tell him Hell is real whether he believes it or not. He will have eternity believing in it.

#222 - On 02/12/2010 at 1:18am by nilofc

(0)

l0l would you like a blessing from Jesus?? l0l

#223 - On 02/12/2010 at 1:38am by starbucksfan33

my sense of humor must be different from his because I don't really find that funny at all :-/

#224 - On 02/12/2010 at 2:01am by Typhani19

(0)

I call mine the will of god

#225 - On 02/12/2010 at 2:17am by daneeyoll

(0)

wash your face in his holy water :D "bukake with love"

#226 - On 02/12/2010 at 2:39am by Sekococo

(-2)

Sacreligious heathen! Next time he says that, tell him you're going to nail Jesus to the cross.

#228 - On 02/12/2010 at 3:37am by wairdt

(0)

if he goes soft does it mean it takes him 2 days for him to rise again

#231 - On 02/12/2010 at 5:38am by daniel361

(0)

..and this is why he's had to beg for the past two hours.

#233 - On 02/12/2010 at 9:38am by ohSNAPyall

(0)

My pussy is call the iron clamp her ability comes from her VCH. that remind me how i had to call the paramedics to take me of my ex since i clamp to tight. Sigh R.I.P little jimmy - once big and now crush.

#234 - On 02/12/2010 at 9:46am by Sekococo

This comment has been moderated.

#236 - On 02/12/2010 at 11:40am by deanftw

(0)

OMG hahahahaha tht was a guud one ur bf is hilarious i dont think this was exactly am FML but it was fumny

#237 - On 02/12/2010 at 1:28pm by wezywei

(0)

you should have told him jesus got strapped to a cross and burned...

#238 - On 02/12/2010 at 1:37pm by makc5point3vtec

(0)

Hahaha.

#239 - On 02/12/2010 at 5:00pm by Skankkk

(+1)

that hilarious he deserves some head

#242 - On 02/13/2010 at 12:55am by nightELFassasin6

(0)

That's hilarious :D But I can understand if it bothered you because you're religious. Then, that's not cool for you ):

#243 - On 02/13/2010 at 4:49pm by picturescrazy

(0)

ahahaha, thats funny.

#245 - On 02/14/2010 at 1:09am by Schmuty

(0)

haha my bf does the same thing except he usually says "christ has risen, christ will come, christ will rise again" ...and i love #228. i'm totally gonna say that if he starts annoying me with it

#246 - On 02/14/2010 at 7:23pm by HellKitten18

(0)

he will have to answer to God for that, then we will see who I laughing

#247 - On 02/15/2010 at 1:29am by JeffyisDisgudtip

(0)

lmfao

#249 - On 02/15/2010 at 5:12am by krazykiya12095

(0)

"in you right hand, there are pleasures forever" -some bible verse

#253 - On 02/15/2010 at 11:13pm by purplemnm

(0)

lol FYL but this dude is brilliant! can i meet him XD lol

#258 - On 02/18/2010 at 2:01am by lovin_darkness

(0)

that's kind of disgraceful to Jesus but it is kind of funny lol

#259 - On 02/18/2010 at 10:05pm by KGirl123

(0)

hahaha thats hilarious!!!!!

#260 - On 02/19/2010 at 3:32pm by bgue94

(0)

This is hardly an FML; Jesus can preform miracles ;)

#261 - On 02/19/2010 at 4:09pm by suicidalmashmelo

(0)

Perdix fuckin rocks, FML wouldnt be as much fun without him.

#262 - On 02/24/2010 at 4:11am by butterflyhearts

(0)

AHAHAHA

#263 - On 02/26/2010 at 11:28am by joce445

(0)

lmfaooo your dudes going to hell

#264 - On 02/27/2010 at 3:21pm by cjHidalgo

(0)

haha that's funny!!!!!

#265 - On 02/27/2010 at 10:59pm by stephen123456789

(+2)

that's probably one of the funniest things i've ever heard. kudos to your fucking boyfriend.

#266 - On 02/28/2010 at 8:39pm by aaalexa

(+1)

that's hilarious! come one, admit it, its funny.

#267 - On 03/01/2010 at 6:16pm by underaburningsun

(0)

Lol tell me your not still with him...It's funny...
His stuff had better be that big!!

#268 - On 03/02/2010 at 7:13pm by Brontesky91

(0)

hahahaaaaa lmao hahaha that's so funny cool guy I guess!

#269 - On 03/10/2010 at 4:19pm by mollyo

You should've said you were atheist :P

#270 - On 03/13/2010 at 8:57pm by atreyu947

(0)

i don't understand how this is a FML this is just funny as hell!

#271 - On 03/21/2010 at 8:22pm by 44ashley41

(0)

That's hilarious!!!!!!

#273 - On 03/24/2010 at 4:25pm by sexysinglesam

(0)

No Soviet Russia jokes? I've never posted one, but I like to see them from time to time, so....

In Soviet Russia, penis names you...

I call mine Happy, cuz he brings pleasure.

Here are a few:

Let Jesus take the wheel.

Confide in Jesus and you will be saved.

It would give new meaning to the song Jesus Loves Me.

Don't deny your maker.

Save me Jesus!

In Jesus name we pray, OH GOD!

...and hopefully he doesn't get lost in the spiritual void.

Any of these work? ;P

#275 - On 04/18/2010 at 10:37am by rasellersjr

(0)

your boyfriend and his jesus sounds AWESOME!

#276 - On 04/18/2010 at 6:33pm by Julianneisasmurf

(0)

I like him. Endless possiblities. "Would you like to feel the amazing power of Jesus Christ?" "Accept Jesus into your vagina". ... I like him.

#277 - On 04/20/2010 at 1:56am by blacklite69

(0)

hahaha, wooow. this is hilarious. xD

#278 - On 04/23/2010 at 8:31pm by sillyhero

(0)

hahahahhahahha Ima do that!

#280 - On 05/07/2010 at 2:01pm by albopoontang

(0)

wwjd?

#282 - On 05/18/2010 at 12:50pm by upintheorange

(+1)

maybe he'll give you semen on the mount

#283 - On 05/18/2010 at 10:49pm by blotter9

(+1)

open up to Jesus 

#284 - On 05/30/2010 at 11:30pm by meowkittyxo

(0)

This is not an FYL. This is too awesome to even begin to describe. If my boyfriend named his penis Jesus, I would love him forever.

#285 - On 06/22/2010 at 12:11am by Islander

(0)

hahaha so adding to favs lol

#286 - On 07/31/2010 at 6:59am by awsomechick212

(0)

Well, did you find jesus yet? he's a tiny guy

#290 - On 08/30/2010 at 5:38am by Chocolate_Chunk

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