Today, my group of friends, my girlfriend, and I were playing 'never have I ever.' My girlfriend's turn came up and she went with, 'Never have I ever had an orgasm.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (45952) - you totally deserved it (13877)
On 02/17/2009 at 10:22pm - intimacy - by skeletor (man) - United States (New York)
Shouldn't she have formulated that statement as, "Never have I ever had an orgasm"? Never Have I Ever is the name of the game, after all...
Anyway, if she meant to imply that you've never brought her to orgasm, then why is she only telling you this now? How does she expect you to learn to give her one if she doesn't give you feedback on what's working and what's not while you're doing it?
Then again, she wasn't necessarily saying it was your fault. Perhaps she can't even bring herself to orgasm, in which case she should consult her doctor to check for disease and get a blood test done to check for hormonal imbalances.
#2 - On 02/18/2009 at 5:41am by kersh
well if you are young enough to be playing drinking games such as "never have i ever", then you probably don't know what you are doing anyway. consider yourself fortunate that you have an honest girlfriend and use that to your advantage by learning how to actually please a woman. your future girlfriends will be thankful (and will stick around / not cheat on you as much)
#3 - On 02/18/2009 at 5:51am by learn
Dude, according to the online rules of the game...
The players sit in a circle or around a room and someone starts out with the phrase "Never Have I Ever" (insert something you may have done or want to find out if another player has done). If anyone in the group has done this they have to take a drink. If you have not done it you wants to find out more about your friends. If only 1 person drinks they must tell a detailed strory about the events.
The person saying so MAY or MAY NOT have done/experienced the thing they are saying... I guess the trick there was, did she drink on that round? If not, you should really get your head out of your arse and speak to her about how you can improve :P
#4 - On 02/18/2009 at 6:04am by Nic
Don't take it too badly man. My current girlfriend admitted to me that she had never had an orgasm before being with me (despite previous attempts by 3 different boyfriends and herself). It varies from girl-to-girl, and some of them just have a really hard time getting there. I recommend trying more foreplay and practice by concentrating on what makes HER feel good.
#5 - On 02/18/2009 at 6:06am by Peter_Griffin_MD
How lame do you have to be to play stupid drinking games and know all the rules to all of them?
#84 - On 01/23/2010 at 10:38pm by sharpiebandit
Um, #6, I hate to break it to you, but... "pounding it really hard" does not help.
Also, in the version I know of the game, you have to say something you have NEVER done. So I'm assuming those are the rules they were playing by.
#9 - On 02/18/2009 at 9:17am by MH
#7: maybe someone who hasn't heard of the game? I'm not from US, or whichever country the poster is from, and have not heard of this game before either. We play different games in this country, certainly less embarrassing and mortifying games, it seems - but looking it up helps to understand the FML post better for those of us not familiar with the term. The difference between seeking clarification and being an ignoramus, but I guess you have the latter covered as far as lame is concerned.
#13 - On 02/18/2009 at 9:48am by Mika
Agreed. I'm from the US and haven't heard of this game in forever so it's not just you.
#85 - On 01/23/2010 at 10:40pm by sharpiebandit
hhahah.. "pound it really hard". there goes a guy who's ALSO not given his girl an orgasm.
#16 - On 02/18/2009 at 12:46pm by san diega
a) The majority of women never achieve orgasm from straight intercourse.
b) Most women don't fully develop an ability to orgasm from oral sex or intercourse until their mid-20's.
Don't think of this as an FML, but as a golden opportunity! Just be patient and attentive and you'll have a much better chance at giving her her first orgasm! (Just imagine how grateful she'd be!)
#18 - On 02/18/2009 at 1:37pm by FrostyNorth
What you should do is step up to the challenge. When I told my ex that I didn't seem to be able to have an orgasm from intercourse, he was like "Ok." and never caught on to my attempts to increase foreplay and what not. Be that awesome boyfriend who gives a girl her first orgasm!!
ohhh geez. that's a bad day bud. Maybe she was hinting at something... oral foreplay is the way to go before sex. Just, don't make it awkward....
#21 - On 02/18/2009 at 2:44pm by fmlismymodo
So you were playing a drinking game in which one has to tell the group something that they have or haven't done that they wouldn't know and you are upset that she said that? Your life isn't f***ed, you're just stupid.
Its true about women needing to be older. We aren't like water balloons stuck on a tap like men. It takes time and patience, and probably not is a reflection on your...skills.
#23 - On 02/18/2009 at 3:45pm by alwaysalady
hahahaha! hey, its her own fault she didn't tell you till now. And I agree that it was bitchy to tell all your friends before notifying you.
but dude... you have to fix that!
#26 - On 02/18/2009 at 5:09pm by JRas
I agree with #25. You should focus on pleasuring her once in a while, not yourself.
#27 - On 02/18/2009 at 5:25pm by fj;ira
Nice going, copying a french FML to be submitted on the english website... lololol
#29 - On 02/18/2009 at 6:01pm by Kabaloo
She said she's NEVER had an orgasm, has she never pleasured herself? Does she even try and pleasure herself? Sounds like you both have a lot to learn, experiment and learn together or bang as many girls as you can until you get it right.
#30 - On 02/18/2009 at 7:18pm by truth
#29 -- it happened. i've never even been on the french site. but thanks for the failed put-down!
#32 - On 02/18/2009 at 8:19pm by OP
as a wise man (dan savage) often says: "play with her clit!"
thats pretty much the key in most situations. or have her play with it.
#33 - On 02/18/2009 at 8:40pm by dan savage junkie
uh so? only about 35 percent of women orgasm during sex. please take a sex ed class and educate yourselves. that's not a FML worthy. also for most of the guys who are so proud that their girlfriends have "orgasmed" when they were having sex, they were probably faking it. so don't be braging.
#34 - On 02/18/2009 at 9:02pm by santi
If she's never had an orgasm then thats not necessarily your fault...if she can't give herself an orgasm how can she expect YOU to give her one? Sounds like she needs some alone time with her right hand and figure out what she likes...
#30 has a point. Studies have shown that a lot of women who didn't masturbate growing up have trouble getting sexual pleasure out of intercourse.
#36 - On 02/18/2009 at 10:36pm by maddie
#30 has a point. Studies have shown that a lot of women who didn't masturbate growing up have trouble getting sexual pleasure out of intercourse later in life.
#37 - On 02/18/2009 at 10:39pm by maddie
definitions of sexuality in our society is all based on masculine ideals of pleasure...if people paid a little more attention to female pleasure then faking orgasms wouldnt be as common. think about it - just penetration without clitoral stimulation is like tugging on your balls and expecting you to come...you need to learn to think about your girlfriend and her pleasure center if you really want to make it work!
#38 - On 02/19/2009 at 12:55am by womens studies.
Eh, don't worry about it. Girls don't come every time. I know I don't. Heck, guys don't even every time (thanks to stress, drinking, etc).
And if she's never worked herself up by masturbating, how the heck are you supposed to know what to do if she doesn't know? Not the same moves work for every girl. So... give yourself a break. She needs to learn more on how to communicate instead of being a bitch about it and not talking to you directly.
#39 - On 02/19/2009 at 1:26am by dachshundcrazy
Lots of girls don't experience an orgasm, anyone who has taken a human sexuality class can tell you that
#40 - On 02/19/2009 at 2:41am by it okay
#6 pounding it hard? LOL apparently you don't know what you're doing either
#42 - On 02/19/2009 at 4:28am by darlingseas
Yeah.... Playing "Never Have I Ever" with my ex was also a bad idea.
#43 - On 02/19/2009 at 11:19am by wat
hey man, dont worry. some women cant orgasm with anything less than 3000 vibrations a minute. no man can do that haha
#45 - On 02/19/2009 at 9:42pm by nono
2 words for you:
CLITORAL STIMULATION!
20x the nerve endings in a girls clit than in the head of a guys penis....think about it....
vaginal stim doesn't usually get a girl off.
#46 - On 02/19/2009 at 10:44pm by gumby06
why oh why she decided that THAT was the moment to tell you... and your buddies...
#48 - On 02/20/2009 at 5:45pm by ridiculous_gnome
pretty sure it's normal. look it up.
i've never had one either.
#51 - On 02/21/2009 at 9:13pm by hihuhiuhi
pound it really hard? seriously? OUCH that does not help. oral sex all the way!!!!
#54 - On 02/26/2009 at 6:35pm by vbdhbvjds
Clearly you all don't know how to play Never Have I Ever. You always pick something you can't drink to [i.e. something that doesn't apply to you] - so by her saying "Never have I ever had an orgasm" unless she drank, then that means she HAS had an orgasm.
#55 - On 02/27/2009 at 4:18pm by B
First off, I'd like to say, zidane312 or answer number 6, pounding it really hard? I'm hoping that you have more than one setting because there is a lot more to the wonderful world of sex than pounding on your lover.
Secondly, skeletor, it sounds like you are focusing on the negative. Communication is a necessity in a good relationship. Use this as an opportunity to talk with your girlfriend. A lot of women have trouble achieving orgasm, by themselves and during sex. Take the time to figure out what is good for her and work on it. Yes, going down on a girl can be great but it is much more subtle than that and this is really the tip of the ice burg so to speak. Conclusion, take time, communicate, and don't take this as a personal attack because it is not necessarily one.
it's ok to have a small penis. or erectile dysfunction. or just be really lame in bed
#57 - On 03/04/2009 at 7:38pm by tifferneelee
I rarely orgasm during sex. I have a hard time bringing myself to orgasm. It's okay, doesn't mean I'm not having an AWESOME time.
Not a big deal, don't worry.
Lets look at it this way. You now know you have to pleasure your gf, what might have been a better idea is if you had played this game before a relationship... then you know EVERYTHING you have to do better/ do period. Its good advice, that and use all of her turn on's.. but most girls have never had an orgasim... and then ones that do sometimes fake it... soo.. i think honesty works better
#59 - On 03/10/2009 at 12:45pm by milifeaintfucked
Its not your fault, she never asked you to help her get there.
#60 - On 03/11/2009 at 1:56am by Cantexplain1234
60% of the time a girl doesn't know if she climaxed... its not ur fault. and there is 10% of the time a girl can't climax. Girls usually fake orgasms. I especially hate it if you asked her how it was and they shrug and won't tell you a thing. So misleading... Just try harder...
It's not as easy for women to have orgasms as it is for men. Also, women may not be able to have orgasms due to psychological problems so maybe you two should talk about your relationship and see if there are any problems. But don't worry about it too much because it may not be your fault, it could be hers.
Don't take it personally. I've had incredible hookups but couldnt mentally relax myself even so i thought I was. I thought there was something horribly wrong with me but it took being really comfortable with a person, my current and first serious relationship. Try to spend a day focusing on her.
Tell her to rub herself while you penetrate and encourage her to close her eyes as well while you talk dirty to her about how she feels and what youd do to her in the shower etc etc .... I haven't heard it's' common for women to orgasm through penetration alone.
OMG epic fail man. its your fault if u don't even know that you have't made ur gf climax. sad....
#73 - On 03/24/2009 at 3:16am by weirdshitsucks
That's pretty bad kid. Although I feel that may be your fault.
By the way...has anyone ever called you Millimeter Peter??
There's your problem right there.
#75 - On 04/21/2009 at 7:59pm by Sebastian69
I was playing this with some friends at my house, and a hot blond said "Never have I ever had an orgasm." Later that night, I gave her her first TWO. True story!
#76 - On 04/27/2009 at 2:08am by christopherlove
Poor girl. FHL, not yours. Work harder in bed. Go down on her if regular sex isn't doing it for her.
#77 - On 04/27/2009 at 11:34am by Victoria2103
The problem with this fml is that he never says if she took a drink or not. If she did take a drink then its probably not your fault, its more of a fhl
#78 - On 05/18/2009 at 1:40am by UncleverName_FYL
wow comments are funnier than the actual post sometimes and i don't know no experience with boys or other wise .. .. ..
#83 - On 11/18/2009 at 10:42am by HarperGirl
