Today, I was in the bathroom defecating when I felt something hanging there. I reached back with toilet paper and starting pulling it out inch by inch; 3 feet later I learned I had a tapeworm. Worst of all, no pharmacy has the med the doctor prescribed. I have to live with this thing until the med gets here. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39728) - you totally deserved it (1743)
On 09/15/2009 at 5:14pm - intimacy - by benander (man) - United States (North Carolina)
*My tapeworm tells me what to do!*
*Pull the tapeworm out of your ass (HEY!)*
System of a Down rocks :P
#71 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:01pm by coloradodude12
Yeah really, what did OP eat to get a 3 foot tapeworm?
/flashes to CSI when the tapeworm crawls out of that guy's mouth
//i can only imagine how disgusting it would be to pull a tapeworm out of one's ass
///slashies
think of it as this... you can eat whatever you want cause it will eat everything you eat
#112 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:33pm by a1mostevi1
that has got to be one of the worst ways to find out you have a tapeworm. protip: always fully cook hamburger meat and other grinded up meats
#128 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:50pm by brutallyhonest24
Na, the tapeworm is usually in the larvae or early stages on the food, so it could even be smaller than a grain of rice. Then when it gets inside of you and starts feeding on your chewed-up food, it starts growing. It's fucking disgusting.
Agreed with you there #138. There has to be a line drawn somewhere. *shiver*
Thank sweet-mother-of-pancakes fmylife.com taught me to not ever eat and read FMLs at the same time long ago.
#200 - On 09/15/2009 at 10:56pm by CyclonePsycho
Can't just pull it out, it would just break and segment and you'd still have the head surviving inside you. The only thing that kills it is the medicine.
Side note, there are quite a few ways to get a tapeworm, but the most common method is feco-oral contact.
Another side note to another reply here; Being a vegetarian doesn't matter, in fact vegetarians have a higher instance of hookworms and thread worms.
#206 - On 09/15/2009 at 11:01pm by TheTruth1428
OP could have eaten a vary large number of things, any of which undercooked, and containing tape worm larva or eggs could have led to the condition. It is not un-heard of.
from Google:
Tapeworm infection is acquired by eating raw or undercooked meat of infected animals. Beef generally carry Taenia saginata (T. saginata) while pigs carry Taenia solium (T. solium). In the human intestine, the larvae from the infected meat develop into the adult tapeworm -- which can grow to longer than 12 feet.
OP, sounds like you were lucky yours was a weenie tape worm, otherwise you would have been pulling out of your ass an animal over twice your own height. talking about freaking the fuck out.
On the other hand you could always try to train it to do tricks. That would be the life of any party. "oh yeah, fuck your toy poodle, watch what my ass worm can do!"
#210 - On 09/15/2009 at 11:05pm by lets_be_ian
YDI, like #1 said What did you eat? You either undercooked your food or were rimming someone. So yeah YDI.
@256 - read the OP's reply. it was undercooked salmon. but OP never said he prepared the salmon, so it's not necessarily his fault it was undercooked.
@138 - *starts drawing*
#273 - On 09/16/2009 at 9:22am by diet_otaku
omg that almost made me piss my pants o.o lmfao :P
Yeah screw your poodle! my ass worm can jump through hoops *fart* oops there it goes.
#278 - On 09/16/2009 at 4:43pm by falconpunch125
#138 pretty much rule 34'd that one. Everything is doomed
#297 - On 09/20/2009 at 5:23am by PandaPandaPandaX
Ew on so many levels. Also: now no one can say first!
#2 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:20pm by TakeItEasyPeople
Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment.
FIRST!!
reply to you:)
#28 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:37pm by i8shrooms
No. They can grow to rediculous lengths. And, the worst part is...it's a worm. Like all other worms, if you cut it in half...it regenerates. =X
#13 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:25pm by ChelseaAnn08
actually tapeworms are segmented, so it will just keep growing. that's probably what happened to this poor soul; they just pulled out a 3 foot segment of the tapeworm. [shudders]
What makes you think there is only one of those in there? There could be a whole colony in there. Good thing the OP discovered it before he got too sick.
#288 - On 09/17/2009 at 6:56am by spidermantexas
ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww how longggg.. OP, if u were a girl and it came from your frontol regionss.... ummmm wow.. im sure i raped everyones eyes with that...
#326 - On 10/27/2009 at 12:05am by moon_mistress
WHAT THE FUCK.
This NEEDS to be illustrated. I cannot back that enough.
#10 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:23pm by allmidnighteyes
*shudder* Yuckkk, if they illustrate it I hope it doesn't look as realistic as the image in my mind right now. x( This is one of the grossest FMLs I've ever read. Eww.
#109 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:29pm by Amysbodybetrayal
A guy ate food (on purpose) with tapeworm eggs in it (are they eggs? idk) and let it grow. about 2 months later he had a worm removed from his intestines that was huge. Human Biology has taught me some pretty gross stuff :S
#296 - On 09/20/2009 at 5:12am by PandaPandaPandaX
It's not that bad. Just let the worm live it's life until the medication come. It's not like it's causing any pain (if it is, I'm sorry.) Just go without thinking about it for a day or so and you'll forget about it completely, works for me every time I want to forget about something, like school. ;D
#11 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:24pm by fatehatesme09
Yeeeaah, the tapeworm survives by stealing nutrients from your body, sometimes to the point of malnutrition. Not hurting you at all...
#26 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:35pm by kitkatkelly
@26, i think he meant that if he couldn't actually feel any physical pain, it would be a little be easier to ignore
but that is just eww...that thing has gotten all the way down your digestive tract
#34 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:41pm by the_stereotype
Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment.
You were defecating? My word 'ol chum. Watch your tongue whilst using the World Wide Web, there are sure to be young people out there who, with their impressionable young minds, would be sure to use this word in everyday language. I hate to be crude but could you imagine a world where people use "defec*te" in every day language?
Ex. Holy Defec*te! That man just shot his fucking balls off!
My apologies for the '*' I was using. I simply can't bare to see that word used so often. Once is far too many times in my humble opinion.
Asshat.
Well it's not his fault that he didn't want to say "I was taking a crap."
#17 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:30pm by Epic_Phailure
What else was he supposed to say?
"Today, a flurry of chocolate McNuggets erupted from my asshole with the fury of Mt. Vesuvius burying Pompeii"?
#25 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:35pm by allmidnighteyes
#25, you win so hard XD
FYL, OP. Hopefully the meds come in asap.
#68 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:59pm by cocoapuffshooter
You do realize, dspadres, that you spelled "bear" wrong in your post? Kinda ruins your credibility to go bashing other people's English skills when yours are lacking in itself.
#114 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:34pm by nitrous2401
Tapeworm would like to battle!
Tapeworm sent out itself!
Asshole sent out chocolate fudge!
Chocolate Fudge used defagate! Aka dspadre
Its not very effective!
Tapeworm used asshat!
ZOMG Critical Hit!
It super effective!
Asshole fainted and regurgitated Anal Fecal Matter!
Asshole Browned Out!
#146 - On 09/15/2009 at 9:21pm by TheLoneWolf87
#14 - you clearly aren't as smart as you wanted to make yourself out to be. if you were as smart as the average person, you would realize the term "defecate" is what is scientifically correct, therefore something that is also ok to say in normal conversation...
much better than saying "i'm taking a shit or crap"
... idiot.
pretty sure he already knew that and was bagging out the OP for feeling obliged to use the correct terminology rather than some other crude word.
The following people just got trolled by dspadres:
Epic_Phailure, kitkatkelly, allmidnighteyes (though your response makes it worth it), nitrous2401, vwe. @LilaBear: bingo.
#234 - On 09/15/2009 at 11:45pm by Edumacated
I know he was trolling, it was pretty obvious that it was.
I just needed an excuse to post what I posted :]
#239 - On 09/16/2009 at 12:03am by allmidnighteyes
#25 - I wasn't going to read the comments of this FML. I wanted to forget it and move on. I don't know what possessed me to change my mind, all I know is I'm glad I did.
OMG, allmidnighteyes. You seriously made me laugh so hard my mom thought I was coughing. I agree,^^^ E.P.I.C. Your seriously like my hero:P
How do you not know you have a tape worm?? especially one that long!! Major FYL
#15 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:27pm by Playdate
you don't necessarily have to know even if it's 6 feet long. it's a parasite, it can hide pretty well.
#18 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:31pm by loveeisnott
Um do some research, most people dont know they have tape worms until they loose a lot of weight or it decides to make a surprise appearance like what happened to the OP.
Its not like you feel it moving around inside of you.
I hear back in the old day, they used to put tapeworm eggs in pills and sell them as a miraculous weight-loss pill.
OP, were you raiding an ancient drug store in hopes of losing weight?
#143 - On 09/15/2009 at 9:15pm by adelaide_evening
Wow, this is about the epitome of FML! Im sorry OP...maybe you can get the meds from a hospital or a nearby town?
Or a vet? WTF is it with worms today? I was holding one of my dog's 4 week old puppies today, and I felt something moving on my arm. It was a worm coming out of his butt! I almost dropped the poor little thing! The vet said it's common after the first de-worming. So disgusting!!
#255 - On 09/16/2009 at 2:03am by girlygirl666
At least it one came out, someone died having a tapeworm because it started eating its organs. A least you're still alive so that's good.
#27 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:36pm by PIQ
BLARG. Tapeworms are some seriously disgusting creatures. FYL, I've known a few people who have had them.
English Trolls: please, PLEASE shut the fuck up. Take a cue from the Taoists: "He who speaks does not know. But he who knows does not speak." If you're so damn smart, show us by writing an eloquent post instead of throwing your shit at the wall and howling. GodDAMMIT.
#35 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:42pm by BlueBomber
that's disturbing. I heard that you can put a piece of meat in front of your mouth or I guess asshole and lure the tapeworm out of your body.
Actually, you can. Sort of. If you don't eat anything for a day or two, then hold some smelly food - milk, peanut butter, meat - in front of your mouth, the tapeworm will smell it and might try to crawl up your esophagus and reach out your mouth to get it. At which point you (or a friend, since you won't be able to pull too far from your own mouth) grab it by its head, whip it out, fling it across the room, and take pictures.
#318 - On 10/08/2009 at 7:21pm by WoWoWoWoWo
Dude. This is a huge FML. they are so gross D: Im sorry you had one :/
#38 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:43pm by thelovelykira
eww that's nasty! do u feel it at all inside of u? did u name it?
#41 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:45pm by maryoceanblue
It's attached to his intestines. If he could physically pull it out (which I'm pretty sure he couldn't because of the way they attach themselves with teeth-like projections), he would seriously cause some damage.
If u drink a tiny bit of cyanite not enough to kill u but to paralyze your stomach for a couple of hours the tapeworm will detach and be excreted during a bowel movement.
Cyanide? I would not trust myself to put *any* amount of that in my system.
#159 - On 09/15/2009 at 9:39pm by ihatestupidppl
This sounds like the awesome basis of a sitcom...!
"Meet Charlie, he lives with a tapeworm, lets find out what happens when Charlies friends come round for a pool party...!" *insert studio applauds.*
#44 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:45pm by DrunkenValor
I gagged a bit. I haven't met anyone who's had a tape worm, but hopefully it'll be gone soon. At least you're alive, and it hasn't moved on to organs. Wish you luck in getting better! =/
Lol I wish I didn't just eat dinner before reading this FML
#51 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:50pm by waterynuggets
The thing was probably like this:
http://i31.tinypic.com/oa9dsg.jpg
SURPRISE!!!
#54 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:51pm by allmidnighteyes
LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WTFFFFF DID U EAT XDD
#55 - On 09/15/2009 at 7:51pm by urmamaisgay
Dude... you gotta COOK YOUR MEAT. How do you get a tapeworm outside of a third world country in the 21st century, unless you're eatin your food animal planet style? Still, that has GOT to suck. fyl indeed. Hope your meds come in soon...
Who "defecates"? I poop, drop a deuce, take a shit, take a crap, make fudge, take a dump, drop off friends at the pool, make a chocolate baby. But "defecate"? No need to be so clinical about it.
You forgot......Open up a can of soup, pinch one off , take the Browns to the Superbowl, lose a few pounds, make a donation to the porcelin god, release the chocolate hostages, pop a squat, give birth, lay an egg, kill a fish, and feed the alligators. xD Bahahahaha.
#113 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:34pm by ISeeStarsBitchh
Dude, same thing happened to me! I was sitting there dropping the Browns off at the SuperBowl and felt some thing hanging, pulled on it a good couple of times and as it started coming out, it was like 6 inches long! Crazy feeling man, I feel for you.
I think the worst part about this is not pooping out a tapeworm, but that you have to live with it hanging out of your ass for however long the meds take to arrive. :(
#70 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:00pm by potatopeeler
Guess this means no backdoor action for a while? ;)
#72 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:01pm by cocoapuffshooter
Omg ewww >.< how do you even get a tapeworm?? No, wait, I don't think I want to know...
#74 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:03pm by MadeOfAwesome
I was eating supper when i read this and had to stop chewing and take it out of my mouth .
YDI for loosing my appetite AND being a dirty mofo
#76 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:05pm by YourLife_sucks
OP: ignore the people below us(except the ones being sympathetic), talk it out with your husband and mend the wound rather than split it open.
THAT'S some serious shit... 3 feet! I'm sorry for you and the doctor that has to see a three foot thing up your ass
Omg... this made me feel all squirmy inside. Let's just hope you don't wind up like the woman on 1000 ways to die.
omg thats disgusting! ugh i just got the worst visual x.x
#87 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:13pm by Sun_Kissed18
uhm. I think I barfed a little. Sorry to hear thaat..
#88 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:13pm by Daaniellee1234
OH. MY. FUCKING. GOD. that is the single most nasty, disgusting, foul, gross thing i have EVER heard in my ENTIRE life. holyshitholyshitholyshitholyshit i am so disturbed.
#91 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:15pm by in_wonderland
This has to be one of the most disgusting FML's ever! Bet you were wondering why you were losing so much weight!
My toilet brings all tapeworms to the bowl
and they're like, "it's longer than yours.
damn right, it's longer than yours"
I can infect you, but I have to charge.
My tapeworm is longer than yours.
#93 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:18pm by allmidnighteyes
holy shizznats. FYL, seriously. hope the meds come asap. :(
#97 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:20pm by ohmyword08
This is the guy that posted this. To answer your questions: Cook your salmon thoroughly or else; Only a pill will kill it; It doesn't make you loose that much weight but you do feel like shit; They can potentially spread throughout your body; and finally it is fucking gross!
Killed my love for seafood right there, dude.
Internet fame, but at what cost?
AT WHAT COST!
Again... sorry about your secret buddy =/
omg dude im so sorry it must suck!
but in what way does it make you feel like shit ? does it hurt ? and wtf do you just sit there wile it "hangs around" DAWM sorry :(
#217 - On 09/15/2009 at 11:12pm by 122vanessa122
The horrible spelling makes this comment 10 times funnier.
#309 - On 09/28/2009 at 10:57pm by Harry_Poochi
Wait, wouldn't that have been, like, severely painful? Did House lie to me?
#106 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:27pm by kscott88
i know exactlyyyyy which episode you're talking about.
i was thinking the same thing.
#185 - On 09/15/2009 at 10:31pm by vlgala
Just dangle your ass over some tasty chicken and it should fly right out o:
anyway, fyl.
#119 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:37pm by NonExistance
that's fucking awful...but luckily it isn't in your large intestine, otherwise it could have led to your death.
#120 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:38pm by 14hatemachine
Buddy...your large intestine is what connects rectum and small intestine. Yes, if it's in your large intestine, it might lead to your death. That's because NO MATTER WHERE IT IS, IT IS POTENTIALLY DEADLY.
People hate my guts; I hate their spleens.
#126 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:49pm by Intoxiicunt
lol. Are you at this shit again, assbag? Stop being jealous of intoxicunt just 'cause you look like an Orc. Reported.
YDI for not making sure to thoroughly cook meat. Everyone knows that shit puts you at risk for parasites.
Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment.
i call fake on this one. the states arent dirty and unless youve been somewhere like south africa recently, this wouldnt have happened.
#131 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:55pm by charmasaurus
Umm, actually yes it can.
http://i.abcnews.com/Health/PainManagement/story?id=6309464&page=1
Here's a good example.
I was eating. Now I;m not. I may never eat again.
That's repulsive.
#132 - On 09/15/2009 at 8:57pm by alwaysalady
I'd cry. Feeling sick just thinking about it.
But kudos to you-best FML I've read in a while.
#141 - On 09/15/2009 at 9:10pm by Chibi_Seme
I WAS EATING!! AAARRRRGGGHHHH! Now I keep looking at the sauerkraut on my reuben, and all I can see is a tapeworm :( I kind of hate you a little right now. Note to self: make sure you've finished eating dinner before reading the new FML's of the day.
#144 - On 09/15/2009 at 9:16pm by adelaide_evening
Get some meds from your local vet...it works the same, right?
#147 - On 09/15/2009 at 9:23pm by disney_blonde
Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment.
You are the most horrific and despicable type of breathing scum. What gives YOU the right to summarily and without provocation, destroy maliciously and with contempt, an innocent living animal, one that was designed by Almighty God? How DARE you slowly torture to an agonizing death, with painful chemicals another creature that has as much of a right to life as you? Who made you judge over the life and death of another?
You are a dark, cold, soul-less, and selfish sub-human pig! What do you do in your spare time: Push little sore ass ducks into salt water?
I hope someone reports you to PETA. You deserve the full, unbridled, and disdainful wrath of animal protectors the World over.
What a sorry, no class, son of a motherless whoring bitch.
150- im all for animal protection, but i dont think sacrificing your own life is worth the life of one tapeworm...
#152 - On 09/15/2009 at 9:36pm by RavensRule97
This has got to be sarcasm... for many reasons, not the least of which is that you're talking about an animal that was attempting to slowly kill this person by sealing his food and nutrients...
I hope you're trying to be funny... because if you're not, you need to get a life.
#169 - On 09/15/2009 at 9:59pm by fluffypoo09
They were obviously being sarcastic and trying to be humorous, and I thought it was funny. Apparently no one else did since the comment was buried....people need to get a sense of humor.
#232 - On 09/15/2009 at 11:41pm by adelaide_evening
i would sacrifice myself to save the 3 foot long worm living inside me any day.
#311 - On 09/30/2009 at 7:23am by che_williams
ok this is one of the grossest things ive ever read. FYL. and number 150.... was that a joke or are you serious? cuz you seem kinda crazy....
Without a doubt, this is the most uncouth and nasty FML I've ever read. However on the other hand, it is the exact reason this site was created.
Disgusting kudos to the OP, and thank you for giving me a reason to avoid tonight fishy-fillet dinner.
Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooow.
#164 - On 09/15/2009 at 9:42pm by made_of_fail
Oh my word. I think I am going to vomit. I wish you the best OP.
#166 - On 09/15/2009 at 9:50pm by TulipLuver
all i can say is
COOL, FREE BAIT!!!!!
lets go fishing :)
#167 - On 09/15/2009 at 9:54pm by dragonmystik3030
Today, i was eating breakfast when i read a FML about a guy pulling a tapeworm out of his ass. I loss my appetite. FML
omg i'm sorry that is so nasty, aw i feel so bad for you :(
#170 - On 09/15/2009 at 9:59pm by carmal2012
Oh good, I'm not the only one! :-x This FML freaked me outtt!
#184 - On 09/15/2009 at 10:30pm by Amysbodybetrayal
OH!!! SO GROSS!!! I AM SO SORRY!!!! EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWwWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
That sucks...I hope they're nothing like the animal tapeworms we see @ the vet clinic - those you have to get 2 deworms 3 wks apart: to kill the live ones w/ the first round and to kill the eggs w/ the 2nd round. Good luck w/ that.
Sounds like something I heard on discovery channel... Something about my teacher in the same instance. Only you switched it up a little.
YDI for using the term defecating.
#187 - On 09/15/2009 at 10:32pm by DeathShad0
EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
I totally agree! This must be one of the grossest FMLs EVER!!! EW EW EW!!!
#188 - On 09/15/2009 at 10:33pm by lalalaaa_
OH MY GOD THIS IS MY WORST NIGHTMARE!!!!!!!!! im sorry.
#189 - On 09/15/2009 at 10:33pm by EmoKidsFail
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GROSSEST. THING. EVER!!!!
Oh, shit. (no pun intended) That sucks. I hope you got some revenge and cut the little tapeworm into pieces!
#191 - On 09/15/2009 at 10:36pm by iFruit
Oh my god, that is absolutely disgusting and horrifying. This sounds like a nightmare. I hope the medication comes REALLY soon (could you not ask your doctor to prescribe a med that they do have?) and you kill it. Fast.
That's absolutely fucking disgusting. Thank god I'm a vegetarian. I don't have to worry about it. [:
Lol on a side note, I wonder what plexico could possibly say about this FML?
#198 - On 09/15/2009 at 10:51pm by JukeboxBunny
Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment.
This is fake.. but since you people don't know why i guess i'm going to have to elaborate.. first off you can't pull out a tapeworm because they are composed of tiny little segments with weak joints that barely hold them together.. now along with that the segments also have teeth-like things that latch on to the inside of your colon so that it can not only stay in it's place but so it can get nutrients.. therefore this person did not accomplish this and either has a huge tapeworm in them or no life and a compulsive-lying habit.. PWNED..
#202 - On 09/15/2009 at 10:58pm by hawthornehit
i haven't commented on one of these fml's in a loooooooooong time but i just HAVE to say something now: that is utterly disgusting. mortifying actually. and i'm realllllllllly sorry this happened to you. FYL indeed.
#203 - On 09/15/2009 at 10:58pm by whoaa_nellie
farside- where I'm from ducks do not have a problem with salt water. that's why my husband and I go down to the bay to hunt them :) so don't go saying it's mean to push ducks off into salt water because it really doesn't bother them. what's bad is PETA freaks like you. go eat a veggie burger and take a few deep breaths I'll sit here and enjoy my steak :)
in biology we had to watch a parasite video and there was a story about a man with a tapeworm. i am sooo sorry dude. it looked painful and uncomfortable to watch the reinactment i can't even imagine what you felt.
#213 - On 09/15/2009 at 11:07pm by yellowpostit23
LOL i hear it's a good way to lose weight!! wow, that must feel extremely weird!! unlucky!
#214 - On 09/15/2009 at 11:07pm by take_a_moment
Im not sure on this. If he didn't pull it out, how does he knows it's that long? If he pulled it out, he would be in the emergency room, unlike all idiots who try and outsmart some of us. To: the horrid redundance(repeating) of making fun of how he speaks, is lame and irrelevant. He actually has some manners instead of retards saying; "I was taking a smelly and wet shit whenever I felt the worm." idiots.
#219 - On 09/15/2009 at 11:17pm by Jincos
Kelly: I swallowed a tape worm last night. It's going to grow up to three feet inside of me, and then it eats all of my food so that I don't get fat. And then after three months, I take some medicine, and then I pass it. Creed sold it to me. It's from Mexico.
Creed: That wasn't a tapeworm.
#220 - On 09/15/2009 at 11:18pm by NaturallyUnlucky
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH YOU POOR POOR GUY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :(:
#221 - On 09/15/2009 at 11:22pm by crazycatlady15
Well, that's horrible to learn.
But don't worry, tapeworms don't do anything but eat the food you eat, so you'll be okay until you get the meds. Just make sure you take all of them as prescribed.
#223 - On 09/15/2009 at 11:24pm by ShenziSixaxis
... and people think that the Canadian health care has bad patient care and the best way to take care of patients are through money making business and that with health care reform patient care would get worse... like to see how this story could be worse
OMFG that sucks so much. well I guess you're sort of lucky you found out sooner than later but still that sucks!!!!
#227 - On 09/15/2009 at 11:33pm by michaelcarell
damn... im gonna think about this every time i wipe my ass
#230 - On 09/15/2009 at 11:38pm by bean_dawg
this is fucking TERRIFYING. I have a phobia of worms and now every time I go to the bathroom I will freak the fuck out
So... you went out into the public with that thing dangling out of your ass?
If so, FYL very much indeed. And FML for having the imagery stuck in my head.
#244 - On 09/16/2009 at 12:23am by youreawhore
The majority of the world population has tapeworm but doesn't know it, if your butt itches at night you most likely do
#247 - On 09/16/2009 at 1:18am by PaulieeBooMN
#247, I think you are thinking of pin worms. Pin worms are tiny parasitic worms that live in your rectum. They can cause your anus to itch horribly. Tapeworms do not bother one like that.
ew. I feel for you. the fml is so gross but the comments are freaking funny. "chocolate mcnuggets". omfg you're my hero. and the afi referance. love it. my fav fml just for the comments. and I never knew there were so many alts for pooing. ahh. <3
OMG, you are the FIRST person on this site to get the This Celluloid Dream reference in my name.
:D
#252 - On 09/16/2009 at 1:36am by allmidnighteyes
Y'know what? u don't need to share that. I almost threw my phone across the room after reading that.
#257 - On 09/16/2009 at 2:08am by george903
I saw this same story on Discovery channel, GG on trying to be original you stupid hick, next time try to get a story that doesnt suck.
#260 - On 09/16/2009 at 2:35am by Tiddlesflyingcat
FYL, but on the plus side, the comments on this have made me laugh harder than I have all week. So you're doing some good.
Be glad you live in an area where this is treatable. I can't imagine a worse death other then slowly being starved of nutrients as the tapeworms start growing/multiplying and digesting everything you eat.
also another fun tapework type disease: in this one, it enters through your foot (i believe) and attaches to your intestines, and then it starts to poke a hole through your abdombinal wall and you have to live with it just chilling there outside of your body, and people in africa who can't get this treated have a stick that they just continually roll the tapeworm up in.
Woah. Let me make sure I'm following this: You can't pull it all the way out, since it's attached to your intestines. But the OP already pulled it out three feet. Does that mean he's going to have three feet of tapeworm hanging out of his ass until the meds arrive?
Balls, dude. This is one of the real "FMLs."
#266 - On 09/16/2009 at 3:25am by ladyvader401
He had to use the word "defecating" because the phrase "taking a crap" isn't civil enough to be published as an fmylife on this site.
#267 - On 09/16/2009 at 3:41am by jewelzgalore
first off the does NOT belong in intimaticy. second at least you'll lose some weight during that time!!
omg that sounds sooooooooooo grosss :(( and painful?? well gross anyway..... yeah it doesnt belong in intimacy - put it over to HEALTH. lol.. so u didnt pull it out??? or you mean to say there's more inside you......... thats so gross.. hope u get rid of those.....
LMFAO! i was reading this thinking eww-kay? but meh... then i remembered it was in 'intamcy'... what kinda sex life dose this guy have xDDD
#275 - On 09/16/2009 at 2:28pm by suicidalmashmelo
ah, FYL.
That would be so embarrasing as well, having to tell people you pulled a worm out of your ass.
I hope you get rid of it
This should probably be a health FML rather than an intimacy....Unless pulling worms from your ass gets you hard
I am offically becoming a vegetarian from now on.
#93 you made me laugh my fuckin ASS off that is WAAAY to funny.
OMG i geel so bad 4 you.......... Hope yah get ur meds in time :-x
#286 - On 09/17/2009 at 12:47am by Zanieboo44
First of all, I'm not quite sure why this is posted under the 'intimacy' category.
Second, and most importantly, I'm fairly positive that everyone who read this FML yesterday was paranoid that they, too, might have a tape worm, and probably thought about it at various times throughout the day.
I know I did... and it's fucking terrifying.
what the he'll......
how does this go into the sex catagorie.? shouldn't it go in health?
#290 - On 09/17/2009 at 9:51pm by paramore7890
from now on, overcook your meat. this is really scary...now i feel i should bring some "shit" to see a doctor just to be safe....
btw, it must have taken a while to pull 3-feet long tape worm out.....ugh...i am getting goose bumps just by typing...
yes its very messed up this is one of the most disgusting things ive ever heard
#295 - On 09/18/2009 at 5:50pm by awesomebeastuga
I think perhaps the OP meant that the information was very intimate to share, not necessarily that it was about intimacy. Telling someone that a worm came out of your butthole is pretty intimate (as in I'd have to be close to someone to share it), but not in a sexual way.
I find it funny how you realized you had a tapeworm 'three feet later'. Did you think that was shit you were pulling out before?
Holy fucking shit, at first i didn't realise what this actually was, so i googled it a bit and now feel like this is the true embodiment of what an FML is like, jesus fucking christ thats so unbelievably disgusting.
Ya, I was kind of confused and kind of disturbed that this was in the intimacy section. Maybe he's grown attached to the worm?
Although I guess it doesn't necessarily have to be about sex.
ok so he pulled out a few inches of it and then what? just let it crawl back fully up his anus?
#310 - On 09/30/2009 at 7:20am by che_williams
Damn, I can totally imagine your reaction at the time.
you: *pulls stuff) wow this is a long piece of shit.
*3 feet later*
you: oh, shit, this is a worm.
I don't know what happens after that, but anyway FML.
Thanks to this though, I'm paranoid of shitting now.
why is this in the intimacy section there is absolutly nothing intimate about that what so-ever in anyway
On 09/15/2009 at 5:14pm - intimacy - by benander (man) - United States (North Carolina)
-----
I wonder why this is under intimacy?
That sucks though.
FYL indeed.
#315 - On 10/04/2009 at 8:10pm by Ohnothingreally
that is sooo gross! ewwww. that must have been a fun bathroom trip for you :D
#316 - On 10/05/2009 at 2:10am by CrystalCryptonit
Here's what you have to do. Find the end that you..... o___0 "got out" and tape it to a wall. Don't be shy-- the tape is your friend. Once its secure, RUN. If its that long jump off your bed or a window. Oh God FML just imagining that......
last I heard...you can only pull out half an inch of it out every 15 minutes without the worm breaking off so How long were you sitting there doing this!?
#323 - On 10/15/2009 at 9:05pm by Vanpraetd123
As far as I know if you haven't taken the medication for getting rid of tapeworm it comes out a little at a time... Three feet is not the amount that would've come out unless you've already taken the tabs... and then it would most likely be A LOT more... perhaps.
Tapeworm will live in your intestines, growing larger and larger and when their length is too much parts of it gets "broken" off... not sure about the correct term... and then it would come out during... well, you know... defecation. :) It wouldn't be three feet though.
#327 - On 11/26/2009 at 9:25am by wild_angel
FYL and F*** you for posting this! Now I have a very disturbing image in my head and I dont think I'll be eating any meat any time soon.
#328 - On 11/30/2009 at 12:59am by SexyLatina89
I am so sorry for you... That is just disgusting and imaging that makes me freak. That sucks, FYL D:
#330 - On 01/03/2010 at 3:30am by Pop1520
i think i just threw up a little in my mouth that is so gross! fyl
#331 - On 01/04/2010 at 4:14am by katybean12
