Intimacy: Today, while cuddling up on the couch with my boyfriend, I asked...

By whatadisappointmnet - 05/11/2011 18:58 - United States

Today, while cuddling up on the couch with my boyfriend, I asked him if this was his happy place too. He said, "Nah, it's in pussies." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 588

You deserved it 9 968

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Same thing different taste

Sexy catboys rule my life

By verno02 - 10/08/2010 23:58 - Canada

Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend. He's the kind of guy that likes to keep things interesting. Just as he started climaxing, he began to meow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 105

You deserved it 8 799

By :(((( - 27/04/2011 06:54

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend and told him how smitten I was with him. He responded by giving me a wedgie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 187

You deserved it 7 090

By Drafrica - 13/10/2014 10:20 - South Africa

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 725

You deserved it 5 794

The Lovecats

By HaedLei - 26/11/2013 12:17 - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend has a fetish for cats. I think I'm going to have to meow before we do anything together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 242

You deserved it 5 860

Awkward

By Anonymous - 29/03/2021 00:30

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to cuddle as we usually do. To prepare for this, the first thing I always do is dive into bed. This time, I felt something squishy under the covers, and screamed when I saw it was a Fleshlight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 604

You deserved it 879

By isoheartcaitlin - 25/08/2009 03:34 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling after getting it on a few times. He holds my face in his hands, looks deep into my eyes and says "I smell chicken." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 368

You deserved it 6 161

Repetition

By Anonymous - 24/07/2022 03:00 - United States - Saint Paul

Today, it was my first time with a new boyfriend. We had sex in my living room. He asked if he could "eat my pussy." This has became my parakeet's new favorite phrase. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 016

You deserved it 409

Not helping

By Anonymous - 19/06/2022 06:00 - Spain

Today, i told my boyfriend that I wasn't feeling emotionally well, and wanted cuddles. He proceeded to hump my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 898

You deserved it 1 277

Snuggle up

By addictedtofml - 24/02/2009 07:31 - United States

Today, I called my boyfriend crying to tell him I had the most terrible day. He said I should come over, and he would make me feel better. I said I just want to snuggle, and I was impressed with his sincerity. Then he said, "Can we snuggle... with my dick in you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 793

You deserved it 19 964

Pussy power

By Anonymous - 15/08/2012 17:15 - United States - Noblesville

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head on the living room couch. Apparently his two cats didn't approve, and they started attacking my face. Luckily for him, since my boyfriend was holding my head down, his privates didn't get a scratch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 758

You deserved it 5 580

fenceme235 0

Sunday 6 November 2011 1:32

Hope he ment yours

spyman178 0

Sunday 6 November 2011 1:32

Meow

Comments

lizliz23 0

Monday 7 November 2011 5:36

a blind man in new jersy saw tht one comin

Fruitmonster2 15

Monday 7 November 2011 5:59

I would have told her, that its not. Then I would kiss her softly on the lips, and tell her that I'm only happy when I kiss you. :D

DumAsian 3

Tuesday 8 November 2011 0:36

As in plural?

Ian20 6

Tuesday 8 November 2011 6:21

sounds like he said that for shock value, not as a legitimate answer. my thoughts at least ^ ^

brandont03 1

Tuesday 8 November 2011 14:42

At least he's telling you the truth. You wouldn't want him to lie to you!!

tactical_bacon 4

Tuesday 8 November 2011 16:44

haha u should be glad to have a boyfriend so awesome. lots of people on here arent so fortunate

withered 30

Monday 14 November 2011 16:08

LoL what's fortunate about having such idiot for a bf? I'd prefer not to have one then have such an idiot,...

ireardon 0

Thursday 10 November 2011 2:39

what a bro

EmilyPashley 0

Saturday 12 November 2011 22:00

Break up with him

bbiiaattcchh13 1

Monday 14 November 2011 3:28

Take him to go get a kitty then

bumblebee14 0

Monday 14 November 2011 23:59

OMG tell him to come to my house and go to his happy place with me....

Keywords

Stalker Instagram Love Social Media Ironic Embarrassing Animals Phobias Spiders Health Bikes Ecology Transportation Drunk AITA Work Poopoo peepee Facebook Geek Vacation Mysterious Weird Video games Gamers Gross First Dates Smells Technology Parents Annoying

The Top

Today, my mom has two workbenches in her basement. They are so cluttered, they have all but disappeared. Now that she’s actually building something, she just uses the chest freezer as a workbench. I’m hungry and my dinner is in there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 782

You deserved it 92

Today, my husband and I were role playing to keep our marriage alive. His character was a deranged stalker while I was the helpless girl. My neighbor thought I was really being chased so she called the cops. Once they came we explained the whole story and got a fine for disturbing the peace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 853

You deserved it 7 893

The Top

Today, I was standing in line at a coffee shop when the guy stood behind me let out a huge fart, then walked away. The rest of the line turned around, thinking that it was me. An old lady started to lecture me about being rude, while the guy who did it laughed behind his mask in the corner of the shop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 563

You deserved it 129

Today, I was home alone. It was very dark and so I went to turn on the lights, when I heard the sound of a gun loading. I dropped to the floor but never heard a gun fire. I got up and heard the sound again. When I got lights on, I discovered it was only my printer telling me it was out of paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 480

You deserved it 26 051

Today, I watched a tutorial video on YouTube. In the video, the guy had several apps with 50+ red notification dots on them, and it bothered me so much that I couldn’t even finish the video. I couldn’t find a single other video that could help me with my particular issue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 439

You deserved it 717

Today, my girlfriend said she wanted to get a little crazy and try some role-play. "Act like you don't want it," she said. Without thinking, I replied, "Well, that should be easy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 473

You deserved it 54 650

Today, my mum called and told me she had bought me a new, white dish washer for my apartment because it doesn't have one. I was SO excited and told her I'd pay her back as soon as I could. I only had to pay her $1.25. She bought me a sponge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 153

You deserved it 8 632

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 759

You deserved it 13 668