Transportation: Today, my ex stole my car keys. Good news is she can't drive... - FML

By GrandTheftArson - 09/03/2016 03:51 - Canada - Waterloo

Today, my ex stole my car keys. Good news is she can't drive stick. Bad news is she set my car on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 179

You deserved it 1 581

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Same thing different taste

It's mine now

By Anonymous - 26/04/2020 20:00

Today, my best friend's boyfriend stole her car, so now she wants my car, the one that I just bought from her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 648

You deserved it 138

By Anonymous - 01/11/2012 17:09 - Philippines - Makati

Today, after a week of looking for my car keys and being forced to drag my family around on public transportation, my wife found the keys in our car's ignition. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 088

You deserved it 32 259

By Username - 18/10/2010 15:52 - France

Today, I was woken by the news that my car had been found, but was completely destroyed due to a fire. I didn't even know my car was missing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 178

You deserved it 2 915

By seththing - 22/05/2016 03:49

Today, I locked my keys in my car. I had a spare key in my wallet, that I also left in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 098

You deserved it 3 173

By Unhappymothersday - 17/05/2012 20:41 - United States - Raleigh

Today, I woke up to the sound of my car being stolen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 507

You deserved it 2 167

By stolen-car - 26/06/2012 02:55 - United States - Columbia

Today, I finally got enough money to buy the car I wanted for a year now. It was stolen today too. I had my car for 4 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 678

You deserved it 2 655

By PoorCar - 20/09/2009 15:07 - United States

Today, I went on a trip to DC. When I got back I found out my car was stolen. Apparently they didn't know how to drive a stick because it was only 4 blocks from my house and the engine was blown. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 275

You deserved it 2 347

By carless - 15/08/2010 02:25 - United States

Today, my car was stolen. From my driveway. By the guy who sold it to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 900

You deserved it 4 230

By thesmartone - 21/06/2012 03:44 - United States

Today, I let my imbecile of a brother borrow my car. The keys to his car are now jammed into the ignition of mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 008

You deserved it 4 834

By Anonymous - 03/06/2016 19:46 - United States

Today, the police finally recovered my stolen car. All it took was a shootout and two people dying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 656

You deserved it 1 949

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Top comments

mustangbravo 27

Wednesday 9 March 2016 19:10

You at least get to press charges.

football98_fml 20

Wednesday 9 March 2016 19:02

And I set fireeeeee, to your car, watched it burnnnn as I ran away

Comments

jinkiesscooby 3

Thursday 10 March 2016 4:35

I bet your glad you got out of that one

LH_FIRE_22 12

Thursday 10 March 2016 6:10

I smell a lawsuit

FrostyyFML 15

Thursday 10 March 2016 6:10

I see a lot of FML's in Ontario, I guess I'm soon?

napoleod 8

Thursday 10 March 2016 7:05

I apologize, but I found this really funny.

thatsjustgreat1 16

Thursday 10 March 2016 22:00

"But my friend said you cheated on me, so it's totally okay, right?"

Krankerev 10

Friday 11 March 2016 0:08

Wow. What a ****** bitch. Sue her to get money to get a new car.

kfchicken 31

Friday 11 March 2016 7:52

well that escalated quickly

mrkidlmao 2

Friday 11 March 2016 13:15

how the hell did she set fire......okay well it is a woman we are talking about soooo I belive it

jvanevery 19

Friday 11 March 2016 16:45

a lot of people don't realize how serious a crime arson is just taking your car she could probably get by with a misdemeanor taking a car without permission the light in your car on fire is arson she could do 5 years

OrganicSistah 17

Saturday 12 March 2016 14:35

Geez what did you do to her

Keywords

Video games Gamers Love Weird Gross Health First Dates Smells Parents Technology Kids Annoying Jealousy Dogs Animals Pranks AITA Dreams Family Geek Relatable Gun control Amazon Money Cute Birthday Awkward Abuse Social Media Scams

The Top

Today, a customer threw a bottle of milk at me because we'd moved our smoke counter 6 months earlier during our renovations. Moved it five metres to the right that is. He marched out of the store, then marched back, grabbed the milk from my hands, threw $5 at me and then left again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 246

You deserved it 589

Today, I asked a girl at work out, who'd claimed she was single. Not ten minutes later, our boss fired me. Turns out that girl is actually his side chick he cheats on his wife with, even though she’s 19 and he’s 48. Not illegal, just scummy as hell, and he fired me out of jealousy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 747

You deserved it 100

The Top

Today, my date sent me a text saying "I'm sorry we're running late, we will be there shortly." I replied asking what she meant by "we". She said her parents, who were coming along to chaperone. I laughed about two 27 year olds having chaperones, until she walked in with her parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 492

You deserved it 3 417

Today, I woke up to my pants off and my vibrator still on. I fell asleep masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 726

You deserved it 57 235

Today, an old lady wearing a low-cut shirt with no bra underneath came into my line with some groceries. At some point while bagging her groceries, her wrinkled breast slipped out of her shirt. She didn't even notice. I wish to fuck I could unsee this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 835

You deserved it 2 278

Today, I went to the dentist to get a cavity filled. The numbing medication didn't work, so I felt everything. I was in so much pain that I accidentally bit down on the dentist's finger, causing him to yell in agony. Now, I have to find a new dentist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 759

You deserved it 144

Today, my husband of 4 years announced that he doesn’t love me anymore and that he’s leaving me for his coworker who he met 2 months ago. I helped him find that job. It’s like I aided in the destruction of my own marriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 367

You deserved it 106

Today, my boyfriend and I snuck into the bathroom together at his house for a quickie. Just as we unzipped our pants, his step-dad knocked on the door. Panicking, I jumped into the closet to hide. When his step-dad came in, he went to put some towels away. In the closet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 096

You deserved it 42 130