Money: Today, I was walking downtown when a bum approached me for some...

By dude - 24/03/2009 20:52 - United States

Today, I was walking downtown when a bum approached me for some change. I planned to give a couple dollars but after pulling out my wallet exposing my cash, the bum beat me unconscious. The bum is a 5'0" tall woman; I'm a 6'2" male out $200. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 136

You deserved it 34 251

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 30/04/2012 21:46 - United States - Tampa

Today, I was walking home, when I saw a homeless man trying to tear the wallet out of another guy's hand. I can't stand bums, so I smacked him across the jaw. That's when the other one kneed me in the balls and made off with my wallet as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 814

You deserved it 43 261

By pinkrazrgirl247 - 03/07/2009 06:29 - United States

Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 434

You deserved it 52 207

By whathehell - 27/04/2013 08:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 128

You deserved it 3 639

Smooth criminal

By Anonymous - 28/04/2012 01:55 - United States - Darien

Today, I was walking down the street, when a little old lady bumped into me and fell over. I helped her up and she thanked me for being "such a nice young man". It was only an hour later as I was in line at the store that I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 665

You deserved it 2 575

Captain Badass

By NotAsToughAsHeThinks - 14/02/2011 03:25 - United States

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? Go on then." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 160

You deserved it 54 028

By Tanner - 16/07/2011 06:23 - United States

Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 441

You deserved it 3 681

By unknown - 12/06/2013 17:33 - United States - Tulare

Today, I was walking to the gym when the woman in front of me dropped some cash. I picked it up and tried to get her attention. She saw the money and thought I was trying to pay her to sleep with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 993

You deserved it 4 482

By hobosarea-holes - 14/08/2010 23:10 - United States

Today, I picked up a penny off the street for good luck on my job interview. A few seconds later, a hobo beat me up, took my wallet, and ran off. The whole ordeal made me late for the interview. So much for good luck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 292

You deserved it 3 765

By who_could_it_be - 06/08/2009 13:35 - Canada

Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 549

You deserved it 570 060

By Anonymous - 23/01/2010 08:05 - United States

Today, I was walking on a main street downtown. Suddenly, I felt someone slap my butt. I turned around, expecting to be my girlfriend who was to meet me there and almost gave an old homeless man a kiss on the cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 852

You deserved it 4 479

MonkeySpeaks 4

Wednesday 25 March 2009 1:06

Honestly, have you not learned to never take out your wallet or show how much cash you have on the streets? Thats just basic.

Bubs_fml 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 1:05

Gotta watch out for that Falcon Punch. Even homeless women can do it.

Comments

shelbi_T80 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 3:33

pussy

alloutbaseball 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 3:36

and ya i agreed with #69 this dude is a liar and #70 don't get butthurt.. i mean she is a 5 0" BUM she can't be strong (pending that this story is real) thus the 6 2" dude is either a skinny 6 2" 140lb weak panzy or he's just a weak panzy and just fyi even if you are a green belt, reach, size and strength plays a huge factor in a fight

ChelseaAnn08 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 3:51

I had to vote you deserved it. Basic street smarts...you NEVER expose your wallet and/or cash. Dumbass.

franciscossj4 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 3:52

ok u got own by a female bum that is 1 foot smaller than u, how did she hit u ? i guess she had to jump to get u or she got a stair, anyhow u got really slow reflex and if i were u i would call willie wonka and tell him that his worker hited me then i will proceed with suing him. PS: the rebelion of the ompalompa bums and they are meaner than ever before.

wanderingmaiden 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 4:04

u r a Dumbass king

franciscossj4 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 4:04

#72 its not that important about the hight, i am 5' 9 and i weight 140 and i am a black belt in kung fu and almost a moe thai master, and have beat people bigger than me in weigth and size. remember this a fighter's strength and abilities comes from his head not from his sizes and muscles. appearandes can be deceiving.