Love: Today, I got knocked over at the park by a rampant dog. My fiancé...

By StrandedWhale - 03/11/2013 07:21 - United Kingdom

Today, I got knocked over at the park by a rampant dog. My fiancé stood by laughing his ass off as I repeatedly tried to stand up, only to be knocked back down again. I'm seven months pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 817

You deserved it 5 156

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Same thing different taste

By randomguy - 09/07/2012 15:09 - United States - Saylorsburg

Today, I woke up after my pregnant fiancée punched me in the face. Apparently, I rolled over in my sleep and knocked her out of bed. She is still pissed about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 959

You deserved it 12 160

Slapstick

By Anonymous - 05/10/2023 04:00

Today, as I was on the floor playing with the dog, my husband walked past, tripped over something, and fell on me, smashing his bony elbow right into my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 618

You deserved it 114

By wifeofafainter - 24/09/2015 06:31 - United States - Bronx

Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 413

You deserved it 3 070

By coloris - 03/08/2019 00:01

Today, I came home on crutches. My dog was immediately afraid of them, and came running towards me, growling and barking. She ran right into me, knocking me over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 642

You deserved it 131

By Al - 22/06/2009 04:11 - United States

Today, I was walking around the park with my wife. Out of nowhere, a little girl on a bicycle slammed in to me, knocking me to the ground. As I rolled over, sure that my ankle was broken, her father ran over to me. He screamed, "Watch where you're going, douchebag!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 909

You deserved it 3 346

By Jacklyn - 18/03/2012 19:18 - United States - Chicago

Today, my fiancé and I decided to have a romantic rendezvous on the trampoline in our backyard. Or at least it was romantic, until I accidentally rolled off and all but crushed our dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 775

You deserved it 20 084

By Anonymous - 09/09/2010 20:09 - United States

Today, I saw a pregnant woman fall off her moped. As I helped her back up, I asked if her baby was okay. I was then blindsided by her brick of a purse while she screeched, "I'm not pregnant!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 640

You deserved it 14 673

Jogging is bad for you

By Broken - 17/06/2009 14:12 - United States

Today, I was running with my sister's dog. It had the brilliant idea of shooting between my legs and I immediately faceplanted on the cement. I now have a swollen nose and cuts all over my body. I'm a grown man who does martial arts and I got beat up by a dog the size of a baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 917

You deserved it 6 755

By Anonymous - 27/11/2011 22:46 - United States

Today, my boyfriend picked me up bridal-style to carry me to our bed. As he carried me through the bedroom door, the dog ran between his legs and sent us both crashing to the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 452

You deserved it 3 598

By -_- - 29/03/2011 02:22 - United States

Today, I was walking in the park with my girlfriend, when out of nowhere, I was savaged and brutally humped into submission by a massive Great Dane. Not only did my girlfriend watch it all, but the dog's owner took the time to snap a few pictures with his phone. Neither bothered to help me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 971

You deserved it 5 348

kaitieloo 22

Sunday 3 November 2013 15:33

Ultimate douchebag.

transcedental 18

Sunday 3 November 2013 15:36

This is the first time I actually say 'Fuuuck' while reading an FML, and I've been around here for years. This is too brutal for a pregnant lady, he should've taken care of you. Sorry, OP, I hope you're alright.

Comments

yourlifeissucks 8

Sunday 3 November 2013 19:45

your fiance is a scumbag

groundzeromma 8

Sunday 3 November 2013 20:03

Hopefully you cheated and the kid isn't his, otherwise the douchebag gene pool is gaining another specimen

askingandy 23

Sunday 3 November 2013 20:44

What a **** face. I'm sure he's not bad all the time, but you should definitely be a total bitch or something for at least a week or two. Who does that shit?

Eahae3 12

Sunday 3 November 2013 21:06

Can you say DOGHOUSE?

jillian2296 11

Sunday 3 November 2013 21:25

wow how rude! please do a follow up

elcee1987 18

Sunday 3 November 2013 21:47

Ditch his ass. Obviously you will be better off without him.

esserskat 12

Sunday 3 November 2013 21:57

I'm so sorry for you!

BEATLES1133 3

Sunday 3 November 2013 22:37

Tell him that he's a little bitch

SuzyTurquoiseBlu 25

Sunday 3 November 2013 22:44

If this were me, I would have laughed his ass out the door. No ******* way.

sammyjo06 14

Sunday 3 November 2013 23:05

Wow. I don't think your fiance deserves to be called a man. No man should let his pregnant woman be put in danger like that, much less stand around laughing about it. He should've helped you up and then stood between you and the dog until the owner could put it on a leash or whatever needed to be done.