Intimacy: Today, a cute guy in a bar came up to me, and we started chatting....

By Anonymous - 16/08/2011 03:31 - United States

Today, a cute guy in a bar came up to me, and we started chatting. I'm a natural blonde, and he commented on how nice my hair was. He then followed this up with, "Does the carpet match the curtains?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 733

You deserved it 5 182

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Same thing different taste

By kklaucen14 - 06/08/2012 01:15 - United States - Connersville

Today, my boyfriend and I went to a party. He got drunk and started talking about how his hot blonde girlfriend gives him great blowjobs. I'm a brunette. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 062

You deserved it 3 264

By brunetteshavemorefun - 22/12/2012 17:56 - United Kingdom - Burnley

Today, I dyed my naturally-blonde hair dark brown. Upon seeing me, my boyfriend immediately wanted to have sex, because I now remind him of his favourite porn star. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 974

You deserved it 15 149

By Anonymous - 07/03/2013 03:14 - United States - Fort Worth

Today, I met a guy in a bar. He was sweet and funny so I asked him out for coffee later. He quickly turned me down, saying that I didn't even meet his first requirement. His first requirement was "looks like a girl." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 368

You deserved it 4 416

I'm looking through you

By lesler - 20/07/2021 06:01 - Canada

Today, my bartender noticed my new haircut before my live-in boyfriend did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 911

You deserved it 194

How're you doing?

By figcurzyez - 23/05/2016 15:57 - United Kingdom - Harlow

Today, the checkout guy at my local store asked me if I had my hair cut. I answered and started talking about my hair, and he gave me a really weird look. He was talking to his friend, who I hadn't noticed in the queue behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 016

You deserved it 2 332

By Anonymous - 23/11/2014 01:33 - United States - Chicago

Today, I was at a club and caught a cute guy's eye from across the bar. He smiled at me, got up and came over, then said "Oh shit! You looked way hotter from back there. Damn!" and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 026

You deserved it 3 581

Having multiple jobs may have its benefits

By Scoudrel - 26/02/2021 17:01

Today, I flirted with the cashier at the local bagel joint. I complimented her unique blue hair and got her number. Later on that evening, she served my girlfriend and me our food at a different restaurant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 278

You deserved it 6 308

By Brunette, small breasts - 24/07/2016 18:51 - Romania - Campina

Today, I decided to finally talk to my crush. I said, "Hello" to which he replied, "First, dye your hair blonde and grow some boobs, then we can talk business." FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 029

You deserved it 1 405

Face the facts

By ugly - 15/04/2011 06:43 - Australia

Today, I was at the hairdresser's getting a trim. The lady doing my hair commented on how beautiful and luscious my hair was, which made me feel really good. I later overheard her telling her colleague that hair as nice as mine was wasted on someone with a face like mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 027

You deserved it 3 365

By Anonymous - 19/06/2015 19:51 - United States - Seattle

Today, a cute guy asked me if I was single. When I said yes, he said "Yeah, you look like the type", and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 162

You deserved it 2 447

gyoopiy 0

Tuesday 16 August 2011 8:35

Does it?

jswizzle_ 6

Tuesday 16 August 2011 8:36

Now you have left us all wondering.

Comments

the_huldra 1

Tuesday 16 August 2011 10:08

I really want a kit kat bar now...

Ray_of_midnight 22

Tuesday 16 August 2011 10:18

Should have replied "Yeah but not the upholstery" like in the XKCD comic.

hanghimXD 0

Tuesday 16 August 2011 10:46

Aha that guy is low -_-

PapSmearNinja 4

Tuesday 16 August 2011 11:35

chicks with a little bit of hair down their is sexy. like a little runway strip but not like narnia

nibh 0

Tuesday 16 August 2011 11:49

Smart kid

perdix 29

Tuesday 16 August 2011 12:18

Tell him "I got Pergo" and then let him try to figure that out.

bawlerr75 9

Tuesday 16 August 2011 12:34

Hey at least he's cute;)

smiller0789 3

Tuesday 16 August 2011 12:39

That was certainly crude and tactless, but not really FML-worthy

roadracer39 5

Tuesday 16 August 2011 12:40

EmmyBabe, I love the way you think

texas_redneck88 10

Tuesday 16 August 2011 12:53

do they match?? or is there no carpet?

Keywords

Relatable Students Work Mental health Parenting Kids Love Embarrassing Awkward Family Intimacy Wanker First Dates AITA Singing Animals Cats Weddings Public freakouts Bodyshaming Transportation Cars Cops Sex Sexism Health Growing old Periods Job interview Education

The Top

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 7 941

You deserved it 56 271

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I agree, your life sucks 895

You deserved it 286

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I agree, your life sucks 1 829

You deserved it 110

Today, I was riding in the car with my new boyfriend. He had "something serious" to tell me. He started to emotionally confess his addiction to masturbation. In detail. The drive was two hours long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 94 296

You deserved it 7 642