Relatable, Parents and Miscellaneous: Estranged - FML

Estranged

By assdialed. - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I got a phone call from my dad, who I haven't heard from in months. I didn't answer, but he did leave me an accidental voicemail, saying, "Oh shit, I didn't mean to call her." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 339

You deserved it 2 692

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

rhymethyme 0

Wednesday 4 November 2009 14:29

Couldn't seem to let this pass Without agreeing your dad is an ass!

Fleecy 0

Wednesday 4 November 2009 18:58

For those who this does actually happen to and its not fake....call back and say "Oh shit I didn't want you as my father". Hehe. Then they'll know how it feels to be disrespected.

Comments

mysterynmayhem 0

Friday 6 November 2009 23:52

are we related? i swear this sounds just like my father lol

sofa_kingdom 0

Saturday 14 November 2009 9:31

You think that's bad? I was in the same situation and answered only to have him ask who this was and then laugh nervously saying he had the wrong number. Instead of being a decent person and pretending to care, he hung up before I could say anything

EmmaMK 35

Sunday 4 September 2022 8:57

I understand, been in a similar situation. Sometimes life is crazy, people are unkind, and it hurts. Sending love and happy vibes x

ilovejustin4ever 0

Friday 25 December 2009 16:42

you should ring your dad bakk and tell him if he dont wana fukkin speakk to you then fukk off and stay out of your life....

bowlingman157 0

Sunday 27 June 2010 6:41

you honestly can't.just say shit?????

cofucked 0

Monday 21 February 2011 6:26

sounds like peter griffin to meg

EmmaMK 35

Sunday 4 September 2022 8:53

Call back. Say hi! And just see if he wants to chat. I would pretend I did not hear the message. He sounds like an idiot but, Life is too short to stop trying. Sending love x

Keywords

Video games Love Gamers Health Weird Gross First Dates Smells Technology Parents Annoying Kids Dogs Animals Jealousy AITA Pranks Dreams Family Geek Relatable Gun control Amazon Money Cute Birthday Awkward Abuse Scams Social Media

The Top

Today, my step-dad was talking about how he was raised in Las Vegas, telling stories about him and his buddies, until he stopped, looked right at my mom and said, "Find her, feed her, f*ck her, forget her. But I never forgot your mom, that's how I stole her from your dad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 381

You deserved it 4 153

Today, I'm a graduate of a wealthy public school in So Cal. It astonishes me how many of my classmates don’t see a problem with today’s politicians, or gas, rent, and food prices. I was given shelter but had to earn everything I had growing up. I knew I wasn’t crazy though they acted like I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 378

You deserved it 105

The Top

Today, my friends held a roast for my birthday, as per my request. They went pretty hard and I got a little uncomfortable. Afterwards, I told them that their jokes were a little too far, and they said all of their roasts were 100% genuine, and they just needed an excuse to tell me their problems with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 362

You deserved it 1 599

Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 696

You deserved it 8 645

Today, I cut my finger at work while chopping some vegetables. I grabbed the nearest rag I could to stop the bleeding and put it on the cut. I didn't know the rag had just been used to clean up a lemon juice spill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 456

You deserved it 4 055

Today, I went to rent a DVD with my 85-year-old grandpa. I was walking around and then realized I was alone. I looked for him for quite a while until I finally found him open-mouthed in the porn section. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 209

You deserved it 3 043

Today, I was working as a swim instructor for kids. Teaching them not to be afraid of the water, I put my face in the water and blew bubbles. I asked them to try it. All of them did, except for one. I went right to him and blew bubbles again. He then said to me, "but I just peed in that water." FML

I agree, your life sucks 94 214

You deserved it 9 280

Today, I had surgery on my "girl parts" and can't have sex for six weeks. My boyfriend sees no need to spend any time with me until I heal up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 429

You deserved it 7 425