Animals: Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving...

By andrea99 - 03/10/2010 09:35 - United States

Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 657

You deserved it 3 415

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Same thing different taste

Clever

By FMLTIMESTWO - 10/06/2009 04:36 - United States

Today, I found a dead bird on my windshield. Thinking I was clever, I turned on my windshield wipers to get the bird off. Unfortunately, the dead bird fell through my open window and onto my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 555

You deserved it 61 960

By Wellthisishawkward - 14/08/2015 22:40 - United States

Today, as I was driving, a bird swooped down, right in front of my car. I didn't have enough time to react, and so I had to listen to my wife cry the rest of the way home. She kept talking about how it bounced off the windshield and how it probably had a family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 732

You deserved it 2 891

By Username - 13/05/2011 08:13

Today, I was driving along when the car in front of me ran over an animal. I only realised this when a chunk of flesh and blood landed on my windscreen. I put my wipers on to get rid of it but instead it got stuck underneath the wipers and smeared all over the screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 848

You deserved it 6 719

By nothingisreal69 - 01/03/2011 22:21 - Reserved

Today, as I was driving home from work, a bird decided to commit suicide by flying in front of my car. The shock caused me to slam on the brakes, totaling three other cars in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 304

You deserved it 13 339

By tristaph - 01/08/2018 00:00

Today, a bird took a dump on my truck as I was driving and the wind pushed it into the keyhole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 369

You deserved it 182

By oops1234 - 16/04/2009 14:38 - United States

Today, I discovered that I had left my sunroof open all night during a storm and my front seats was soaked. I grabbed a towel for my seat but didn't close my sunroof because it was nice out. As I pull out of my driveway, I felt something wet hit my forehead. A bird shit on me through my sunroof. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 502

You deserved it 17 447

By birdbath - 08/11/2009 07:26 - United States

Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 888

You deserved it 3 632

By me. - 14/03/2012 15:19 - United States

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to drive my car through a flock of vultures eating road kill. Since a bird hit the mirror and broke it, I now have to pay for a replacement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 148

You deserved it 3 856

By craphanded - 19/07/2011 17:45 - United Kingdom

Today, I saved a bird from being run over as it lay in the middle of the road. Thinking it had a broken wing or something, I started carrying it home, intending to take it to the vet later. It crapped in my hand and flew away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 783

You deserved it 9 199

By birdmagnet - 25/04/2009 19:12 - United States

Today, I spent 90 dollars and two and a half hours getting my hair done at a fancy salon. As I was unlocking my car, a bird pooped in my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 173

You deserved it 12 617

crazedcabbages 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:15

im pretty sure ur life is not messed up

aaa125 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:14

just clean it up and get over it

Comments

xeldawyn 14

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:13

That's terrible!

cole86 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:42

u lucky buthole now ye have a tarry free dinner!

Skiittleez 0

Monday 4 October 2010 0:20

Yeah thats pretty terrible. And op had to take it off his windshield haha grossss

_TONGAN_ 5

Monday 4 October 2010 3:01

ggvif

EffinAhole 0

Monday 4 October 2010 4:54

It's not like a dead mouse (or whatever small animal it was) landing on your windshield would dirty up your clean car.

guiltypleasure12 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:13

and now you have dinner!

rottentomatoes 7

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:22

hm.. great, Burger King ^^

HahaHokayThen 10

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:28

eww. lol. I wonder what animal it was.

zp5 4

Sunday 3 October 2010 23:00

14 i didn't know vultures could carry cows...

HahaHokayThen 10

Monday 4 October 2010 2:37

chicken, perhaps? (/

aaa125 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:14

just clean it up and get over it

randomchickkk 0

Monday 4 October 2010 5:08

haha ouch. that's harsh.

craziemane 0

Monday 4 October 2010 6:18

boob cleavage

Matu 4

Monday 4 October 2010 20:40

lol 100

d4_user 5

Thursday 18 November 2010 17:46

boobs

corrector_fml 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:14

free food, what are you complaining about?

Chunchunchun 3

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:15

Be happy! You saw nature in action!

crazedcabbages 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:15

im pretty sure ur life is not messed up

sanem0808238036 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:16

that sucks arse man:/

Spastastic 6

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:16

This is worded kind of terribly...

ImaginaryFoe 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 20:05

and punctuated very badly.

Spastastic 6

Sunday 3 October 2010 21:13

Indeed.

Spastastic 6

Sunday 3 October 2010 22:20

Well, the mods fixed it now.

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Sunday 3 October 2010 22:59

Oh good. I thought I was hallucinating decent grammar where it wasn't.

andrea99_fml 0

Monday 4 October 2010 3:22

wow. grammar police over here. maybe a 'large bird' should shit on your head...... lmao

Jessi2487 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:17

just clean the windshield. you dont have to wash the entire car again. duuuh

catatonicsleep 17

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:48

have to wash the whole front... it probably hit the windshield and rolled down the front of the car

Jessi2487 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:51

well still, op doesnt have to wash the ENTIRE car.

MAGNAVOX 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 20:42

cleavage shot.

aleksjai 0

Monday 4 October 2010 15:46

never know ...the animal might of splattered :0

Lilbabynid3 3

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:18

the vulture is the one that should be complaining. just rewash your windshield

Wlollpop 0

Monday 4 October 2010 4:10

what about the animal? Being dead and all...

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I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 748

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I agree, your life sucks 279

You deserved it 965

Same thing different taste

Clever

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