Today, I told my husband that I'm jealous of all the other girls whose husbands always take pictures of them together and post them online. He responded by posting a picture of himself, with me on the toilet in the background, captioned, "The bitch on the pot." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my husband is upset because somewhere out there, on a long forgotten social media site, is a picture of me mooning my geography teacher's house. He doesn’t like that my ass is on the internet. It’s a 30 year-old pic, out of focus, taken on a damn flip phone, and you can’t even see my face. FML
Today, I caught my husband of 13 years looking at other women in Instagram. FML
Today, I saw my husband’s Instagram story of a young lady captioned, “How did I get so lucky?” I took a screenshot of it and sent it to him. His only defense was, “Oh fuck, I meant to post that to my Close Friends! It’s not what it looks like!” He's called me 14 times and has left 6 voicemails of him sobbing to not leave him. FML
Today, my husband picked a fight with me because I have more pictures of our child on my desk at work than I do of him. FML
Today, my husband woke me up by sending me a picture of a guy I used to semi-see. The same night my boyfriend sent me a furious text asking why I didn’t tell him I’m married, because my husband has found his Instagram and was harassing him online. Like, leave me alone. FML
Today, a friend showed me my husband's online dating profile, which includes photos of him with our kids. FML
Today, I found out my husband had a Pornhub account where he photoshops himself to look like a girl. The worst part is that I noticed he wore some of my maternity clothes in the pictures. I guess they were the only ones big enough to fit him. FML
Today, I found out that my husband proposed to his girlfriend, and that her mom had posted it on Facebook. FML
Today, thanks to my asshole coworker and his obsession of posting pictures and tagging me in them on Facebook after I repeatedly told him not to, my wife found out about a party we had with colleagues only. I’m seen in several photos kissing my work bestie, who I hoped I’d keep under wraps until now. FML
Today, I was on the toilet, when I noticed I could see my daughter dancing in the other room in the mirror, so I took a picture with my phone. After I uploaded it, people pointed out that I was visible in the picture, sitting on the toilet and smiling. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Welshite 40
You asked for it. Now all those other women will be jealous and beg their husbands to do the same. I never knew relationships had to be cookie-cutter identical.
singer0421 32
Social media is not a representation of how happy a couple is. No need to get jealous.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (140)
amarie2009 22
I like your husband!!!
mike7800 8
ydi for thinking it strengthens a couple by posting their lives on the internet
maapz 5
So, why are there so few YDI's on this one? 'Cause she did, obviously.
Dellipop 12
This is the first fml I actual laughed out loud at! Omg
annarcheer 19
I would get him back. baaaadddd
EveningShades 6
honestly everyone is making a high deal outta this but I think its funny as **** aand so does my girlfriend. So I don't see why people are making a big deal over this. have a sense of humor. And as to revering to his wife as a "bitch" so what? Sometimes I call my girlfriend a bitch and she calls me an asshole, and it means absolutely nothing to us. I don't know what relationship the OP and her husband have, but if its anything like what me and my girlfriend have, then she probably laughed about it. but who knows cause all this speculation is being done about someone you've never even seen or met yet alone know.
GlasgowSneer 13
Well, don't try and do the same thing as everyone else, lol.
underguarded 20
If you're jealous of internet people, by god how do you function in public.
ladybugz23 13
its not right.....I've been through like that it ruined my marriage and end up divorce.
hobojo69 23
Sorry but this made me laugh way to hard!!