Today, I found out my cousin stole my used pregnancy test and ultrasound pictures the last time she came to visit, and tried to fake a pregnancy. This was two years ago when she stayed at my house. I just found out I'm pregnant again, and guess who just asked to come to stay and "visit"? FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom came into my room, yelling at me about a pregnancy test that she found in my bathroom. My mom wouldn't believe me when I said it wasn't mine. Turns out my sister bought the test, threw it under my bathroom cabinet, and now she won't admit to the prank. She thinks this is hilarious. FML
Today, my ex showed up at my doorstep, claiming to be pregnant with my baby. Of course, I pointed out we broke up ten months ago and hadn't seen each other again until just now, and she is currently six months along. She actually admitted to my face that she figured I'd be too stupid to put the pieces together. FML
Today, I found out my wife of 5 years, with whom we have three kids, is actually my cousin. At a family dinner someone had pointed out how much she looks like my uncle. We laughed until she mentioned that she was adopted from the same town my uncle's ex-wife had a baby. A few questions and a blood test later, we all learned the sick truth. FML
Today, after taking a pregnancy test and carefully disposing of all the evidence so no one would find out, I realized I left the receipt for it on the bathroom counter. I noticed too late as I watch my mom step out of the bathroom, and my step-father go in right after. FML
Today, my ex told me that she's 3 weeks pregnant with my child. Not only was she on her period when I broke up with her last week, her friend let me know that the positive pregnancy test she showed me was a fake that she'd bought online. FML
Today, my uncle stole my cousin's phone to take a picture of me. He then sent said picture to my cousin's boyfriend, saying that she'd been cheating on him with me for over a year. He's been cheated on before and is hysterical. My uncle then had the nerve to act all defensive when my cousin and I exploded at him. FML
Today, I mentioned to my mum that one of my friends is pregnant. She decided I was lying, that I'm the one who's actually pregnant, and that I'm going to get checked out by a doctor. FML
Today, I just found out that my sister slept with the guy that I have had a crush on for years and that she may or may not be pregnant with his child. FML
Today, my pregnant wife has been crying for hours after she found out that I’d slept with the woman who does her ultrasounds. That woman happened to have been my prom date nearly 20 years ago and I had no idea she moved back in town, let alone worked for our doctor. FML
Today, my sister went into a blind rage at me for "upstaging" her by announcing that I'm pregnant, two months after she did the same. My husband and I have been trying for two years. She's in high school and doesn't even know who the father is. FML
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Top comments
Chazzster 32
Why does your cousin apparently want to fake a pregnancy? Is it still a thing that some girls/women fake pregnancy to get a marriage proposal? Or is cousin suffering from some need for attention that she thinks pregnancy will bring her? Or is it something else?
tounces7 28
This has always been a thing and likely always will be. She's likely using to manipulate someone.
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Comments (5)
RichardPencil 32
1 Marjorie Taylor Greene 2 Beyoncé 3 Brett Favre I love guessing games. Just make sure whoever it is that they pay for your pregnancy test and the co-pay for the ultrasound. Let me know when I win!
Chazzster 32
Why does your cousin apparently want to fake a pregnancy? Is it still a thing that some girls/women fake pregnancy to get a marriage proposal? Or is cousin suffering from some need for attention that she thinks pregnancy will bring her? Or is it something else?
tounces7 28
This has always been a thing and likely always will be. She's likely using to manipulate someone.
Warp1978 15
Ummm no, no you can't.
J15237 25
Have you asked her why she did that? I feel like the explanation of that situation would be hilarious. For you, CONGRATULATIONS!
Inkoseh 33
So...keeping your positive pee stick is a thing now? Just huck it and she won't get it. Put the ultrasound photos away so she can't get them? I mean, if she's done it before then you obviously know to not keep the items out of available.