Today, my wife of 10 years bought me a bottle of wine, a wine rack, and a wine accessory kit for my birthday. She knows I don't like wine. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
How can I make this about me?
Today, it's my birthday. My wife took me to my favorite restaurant for dinner. She made me pay for my birthday dinner, along with hers. She also got me a gift card to HER favorite store. FML
Today, it's my 30th birthday. My husband came home with a big case of beer for himself, then told me he didn't have time to get me a present because of work. FML
Keep quiet
Today, trying to impress my in-laws, I put a lot of effort into selecting a nice bottle of wine for dinner at their house. When I got there, I gave the bottle to my wife's mother. Later, my father-in-law emerges from the kitchen to berate his wife over her poor choice of wine. It was mine. FML
It's the (saucy) thought that counts (or not)
Today, I surprised my wife with some new lingerie for our upcoming anniversary, thinking she would like it. Instead of a thank you, I got an ungrateful attitude from her instead. FML
Today, my mother-in-law gave me a bottle of champagne for my birthday. This is the third year in a row she has done this. I'm a recovering alcoholic, and she's well aware of that fact. FML
Equality
Today, I gave my wife a £55 gin Advent calendar. She gave me a £1 one with chocolates i don't like. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me the present she'd bought for me. I said, joking, "I hope it's not a tie!" It was a tie. FML
Inappropriate crush
Today, a week after my 10-year anniversary, I realized I've somehow been roped into hosting my husband's crush's birthday party with all their friends. My gift to myself was a $60 bottle of whiskey that won't arrive in time to help me with my debilitating social anxiety. FML
They're all yours
Today, I was having a garage sale and my mother-in-law came by to see what I was selling. She decided to buy these ugly green wine glasses that were still unopened. It turns out that she gave those to my wife and me when we got married. FML
Today, my husband bought me a present for our three year anniversary. It was a pack of 20 cigarettes. I don't smoke. He does. FML
Top comments
914smv 18
This is probably for her! For her birthday buy lots of beer! and maybe go to a football game!!
Crawyz 11
Well don't wine about it
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Comments (66)
xn3x 10
What did you do to upset her? Get her a nice new set of wheels for her birthday... Just make sure they only fit your car.
kaitb1103 23
Hint hint ;) maybe she feels like you don't give her enough gifts, or maybe you forgot your anniversary, birthday, etc?
Goblin182 27
Buy her some tools.
confused_wandere 26
Plot twist: his wife is a carpenter and that's the best thing he could buy her.
GarfieldDaCat 5
buy her some power tools and a toolbox
CliffyB03 28
Would you like some cheese with that wine?
Robert3242009 13
Happy Wife happy life
JustTheTruth42 13
I honestly hate people like that.
hardcorepunk87 18
Maybe the real gift is when she drinks the present she bought herself she'll be all frisky later. Sexy time incoming!
Sandman0351 13
its for the guy shes cheating on you with
Branessa9611 14
For the next big event you two share, just nonchalantly buy her a bunch of your favorite stuff. See how she likes it.