Today, my mum came to my ballet class. She spent the whole lesson sitting at the back yelling at me to, "Stop sticking your butt out!" My ballet instructor had to ask her several times to pipe down. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom was watching me during my Taekwondo lessons. She was yelling at me to focus on my own work and to quit hanging out with the little kids. I'm the instructor. FML
Today, I finished a ballet class with a group of seven-and-unders. Afterwards, a new student's mother came up to me and thanked me, saying she was glad that her daughter had a "role model with a, ahem, fuller figure" and "not to worry about my weight." I have never thought I was fat before. FML
Today, I was at a ballet recital with my friend, sitting between her and the mother of the head male ballerina. When he came on stage in obscenely tight white tights I whispered to my friend, "You can see his whole freaking package!" I'd whispered to the wrong side. FML
Today, I was at the local theatre watching "The Nutcracker" ballet with my mother. When the prince made his appearance in his tights my mother leans over to me and says, "Those are some well defined butt cheeks!" loud enough for everyone around us to hear. FML
Today, in ballet class, I was really focusing and actually trying to work hard. I was really getting into the choreography. I was travelling big and leaping long. While going across the floor, again I travelled and leaped… right into the ballet bars and fell over, in front of 35 people. FML
Today, my mother followed me to work to see what I got up to. I'm a fitness instructor in a ground floor gym that has big windows overlooking the street. She stood outside and waved at me for half an hour, while I tried to concentrate on teaching a visibly amused class. FML
Today, at my daughter's ballet recital, after she was done dancing, grown adults booed. She's five. FML
Today, I started recording my piano exam pieces to submit, and I was proud at my interpretation that I spent time trying to make it sound good. That was until my tutor walked in and said I had "shit rhythm and ass intonation." My mom was there. FML
Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML
Today, my mother gave me a reprimand for my table manners when I didn't ask for someone to pass the vegetables I could have gotten myself. She then let out a raunchy fart at the table, and had the nerve to yell, "Did you ask to be excused?!" as I vacated the area. FML
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Top comments
FlamingTacos 7
Sounds like she could go on Dance Moms
littlekellilee 45
Maybe she should stop sticking her butt in your dancing.
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Comments (84)
NeonCookies89 13
well you might wanna consider how big your ass is.
x2grant 3
In the words of Jenna Marbles...PIPE THE **** DOWN!
spikekutter 9
i bet you look nice in a tutu..
Happyhighs1 3
No idea who the **** jenna marbles is. The whole time I'm reading this I'm sitting here reading this all I can think of is the inventer of marbles but then why would she say **** marbles are for kids....... So confused
Jennidoll 2
no. it has nothing to do with the toy marbles. go to YouTube and type it in. hell even Google would have worked. you really couldn't think to try to look it up yourself? what the hell is wrong with you people?
MissMess 12
Like the people who post status updates asking for something like the bank or schools number. You're on the ******* Internet already just google it you attention seeking *****.
charvisioku 22
Youtube it you damn fool.. honestly. Some people need their hands holding for the simplest things...
Happyhighs1 3
And I accidently repeated myself. See thats how confused it made me
KiddNYC1O 22
What are "Ehh moms"? =P
Jennidoll 2
the **** is wrong with you?
Geary519 20
that the last time mom comes to see you dancing?
Satoaoi 13
dance moms indeed
CaptainSaveAHoe 11
what is this I don't even